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Clickbait
VIP Member
Congratulations 
to @Facehugger for the thread title!
Well first things first! I got my very own award from @Pom Bear courtesy of my nomination from @Facehugger: I was thrilled.
Am very happy to do a little recap for my fellow Scrunchies as this is easily the best thread on Tattle. The recap is not as needed as some of the other faster moving threads mostly because Big Loz is essentially a sloth who hurts her front bone if she exerts any energy, but some of us Scrunchies can only dip in and out (like Oddbod in a sink) when their time allows.
We had some very funny detective work
from @Pixie7 who like me has not watched Love Island before, but us Scrunchies appreciated the effort.
The gender reveal was delayed which gave us more time to consider names and @roseturntupnose made me belly laugh with her suggestions.
It finally arrived today and unsurprisingly she’s having a girl which was spotted by eagle-eyed Tattlers on Valentine’s Day. You had one job Lauren!
Photos of the reveal that she’s not been able to edit show that the Papa John’s are not her friend, particularly not when dressed in shiny fabric wearing an ill-fitting bra.
It seems Big Loz’s dreams of more TV stardom might of been crushed by her foray into Only Fans so she’ll need her beg list even more. She may use the robot vacuum cleaner to pose on.
We did think the Amazon beg list was pretty low until @Glortard discovered she’s going to sell her used undercrackers to the saddos from Only Fans. Baybeh Cantaffordwaitrose will be so proud. At least Moleman can get a workout trying to prise her thong out of that cavernous arse crack, make him work for his commission Big Loz! I feel a bit cockly just thinking about it
We all despaired at her spelling (it’s a bizarre skill to be able to not spell correctly a word that is in the photo you are captioning) particularly when describing her new masterpiece - a cottage pie (sized to feed a small army) that we would have made better in a year 7 home economics lesson and not felt the need to add fucking sweetcorn to - @Blair-Waldorf had very strong feelings about this addition (totally warranted).
The pie was so very dry and needed ‘gravEy’. The spelling on the ingredients list was truly appalling, it killed off @lalalanded
Thanks to @fluffyglitterbug for sharing the step by step photos taken of the process.
She also *drum roll* made her first ever roast dinner at the age of 34
. Of course she doesn’t follow a recipe because no one in their right mind would want their roast potatoes floating in oil and doused in vinegar. Her portion size was off the scale (as per usual) and she ate a sharing size bag of Doritos and dip as a starter.
Surely it’s only a matter of time until she’s on the beg for a reinforced bed frame “for a friend”
She is still totally exhausted from doing sweet FA so needs multiple #nightsoffcooking to bombard the baybeh with more saturated fat, salt and sugar. Greasy pizza possibly eaten with her clacker out with a side order of something turd shaped (and no doubt deep-fried), a giant cookie, and of course a new face.
@Katewinsletsknee perfectly summarised Big Loz’s diet.
The very basic flaw in her plan to have a water birth was spotted by @Sunnydaze101.
@xyzcba discovered her new ‘asfetics’ branding and it’s given me nightmares ever since.
@MrFMercury may have found us out very own group sponsor!
@Silly-old-Slapper summarised what you need to do to officially join the cult of Big Loz.
I was mightily impressed by the poetic talents of the Scrunchies @Blowup80 here and @Noelc here. This led to a brilliant pun.
@pombear did us proud unearthing Oddbod’s catalogue modelling days. Suits you sir! How he may look if Lozza gives him her spaniel’s ears (the tongue out just makes these pictures perfection) and Big Loz does Demi.
Finally, my favourite pic of the thread and yours too
to @Facehugger for the thread title!Well first things first! I got my very own award from @Pom Bear courtesy of my nomination from @Facehugger: I was thrilled.
Am very happy to do a little recap for my fellow Scrunchies as this is easily the best thread on Tattle. The recap is not as needed as some of the other faster moving threads mostly because Big Loz is essentially a sloth who hurts her front bone if she exerts any energy, but some of us Scrunchies can only dip in and out (like Oddbod in a sink) when their time allows.
We had some very funny detective work
from @Pixie7 who like me has not watched Love Island before, but us Scrunchies appreciated the effort.The gender reveal was delayed which gave us more time to consider names and @roseturntupnose made me belly laugh with her suggestions.
It finally arrived today and unsurprisingly she’s having a girl which was spotted by eagle-eyed Tattlers on Valentine’s Day. You had one job Lauren!
Photos of the reveal that she’s not been able to edit show that the Papa John’s are not her friend, particularly not when dressed in shiny fabric wearing an ill-fitting bra.
It seems Big Loz’s dreams of more TV stardom might of been crushed by her foray into Only Fans so she’ll need her beg list even more. She may use the robot vacuum cleaner to pose on.
We did think the Amazon beg list was pretty low until @Glortard discovered she’s going to sell her used undercrackers to the saddos from Only Fans. Baybeh Cantaffordwaitrose will be so proud. At least Moleman can get a workout trying to prise her thong out of that cavernous arse crack, make him work for his commission Big Loz! I feel a bit cockly just thinking about it
We all despaired at her spelling (it’s a bizarre skill to be able to not spell correctly a word that is in the photo you are captioning) particularly when describing her new masterpiece - a cottage pie (sized to feed a small army) that we would have made better in a year 7 home economics lesson and not felt the need to add fucking sweetcorn to - @Blair-Waldorf had very strong feelings about this addition (totally warranted).
The pie was so very dry and needed ‘gravEy’. The spelling on the ingredients list was truly appalling, it killed off @lalalanded
Thanks to @fluffyglitterbug for sharing the step by step photos taken of the process.She also *drum roll* made her first ever roast dinner at the age of 34
. Of course she doesn’t follow a recipe because no one in their right mind would want their roast potatoes floating in oil and doused in vinegar. Her portion size was off the scale (as per usual) and she ate a sharing size bag of Doritos and dip as a starter.Surely it’s only a matter of time until she’s on the beg for a reinforced bed frame “for a friend”
She is still totally exhausted from doing sweet FA so needs multiple #nightsoffcooking to bombard the baybeh with more saturated fat, salt and sugar. Greasy pizza possibly eaten with her clacker out with a side order of something turd shaped (and no doubt deep-fried), a giant cookie, and of course a new face.
@Katewinsletsknee perfectly summarised Big Loz’s diet.
The very basic flaw in her plan to have a water birth was spotted by @Sunnydaze101.
@xyzcba discovered her new ‘asfetics’ branding and it’s given me nightmares ever since.
@MrFMercury may have found us out very own group sponsor!
@Silly-old-Slapper summarised what you need to do to officially join the cult of Big Loz.
I was mightily impressed by the poetic talents of the Scrunchies @Blowup80 here and @Noelc here. This led to a brilliant pun.
@pombear did us proud unearthing Oddbod’s catalogue modelling days. Suits you sir! How he may look if Lozza gives him her spaniel’s ears (the tongue out just makes these pictures perfection) and Big Loz does Demi.
Finally, my favourite pic of the thread and yours too
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Notredamn
VIP Member
Imagine in your wildest dreams ringing up the GPs for your blood results, and being told 'yeah the results are in' drumroll...'I can confirm' drumroll...'they have come back amazing, congratulations '
'amazing? What so I'm ok for iron etc?'
'yep. AMAZING'
It's amazing isn't it.
'amazing? What so I'm ok for iron etc?'
'yep. AMAZING'
It's amazing isn't it.
Katie8ee
VIP Member
So to be clear in this interview she called her child "a mini-me" and said it would be "a right little diva". So this little human that hasn't even been born has already had its path decided for it. At this point it's just absolutely heartbreaking that little girl will be a show piece sold to Instagram from the minute she is born.
Poor wee mite.
Poor wee mite.
Whatstheteasis
Well-known member
Fuck me! So not only has she made a trough of pasta but she’s only went and cooked a bloody pizza and garlic bread as sides
Attachments
Pom Bear
VIP Member
One minute I'm at home then by the afternoon up in a mountain in Portugal..
Looooooooool
xx.
xx.
Hello. Long term lurker on this thread (as in read it obsessively day and night). I feel like I’ve been on quite a journey with you all from the sidelines. You make me die with laughter. Great job Scrunchies!
Tonight I could take no more. Something trivial pushed me over the edge. It was the block of bloody feta. I can’t contain myself from posting here any longer. It’s been doing the Insta rounds for months. She’s such a fraud I want to call HMRC. Food blogger my ass. I worry for both Odd Bod and Baaaaybeeeh.
Wow. That felt good. As you were.
Tonight I could take no more. Something trivial pushed me over the edge. It was the block of bloody feta. I can’t contain myself from posting here any longer. It’s been doing the Insta rounds for months. She’s such a fraud I want to call HMRC. Food blogger my ass. I worry for both Odd Bod and Baaaaybeeeh.
Wow. That felt good. As you were.
NinaStar90
VIP Member
Anyone seen this on the New mag insta? Looks legit.
Attachments
lalalanded
VIP Member
Former midwife here and I can confirm that communication skills are actually very important in the profession and absolutely none of the terms she's used would every be used by a midwife. When I was a student I once said to a mother (and meant it as a compliment) 'what a cute little bump' and immediately got short shrift from my mentor. Calling a bump 'little' can make an expectant mother very nervous. We always said 'that's a neat bump' or 'you're measuring a bit large'. Bumps don't 'settle' and there's no such thing as 'amazing' blood results, just normal or abnormal. If her bump is real she is measuring big - very big and her midwife would need to have a word with her. If she's recently had blood tests that would be very telling because they are not done routinely throughout pregnancy unless there's an issue. My guess is the next big 'reveal' will be gestational diabetes.Even the terminology she uses: strong hormones, bump will settle , my blood test results were amazing. It's like she hasn't been in contact with a midwife cos that talk is pure shite
Dagenham Dave
Active member
Sunnydaze101
VIP Member
This quote cracked me up. “ and the growing tot is "really strong and really active", kicking and even "sunbathing", according to Lauren.”
Sunbathing
..Is she trying to cover her tracks for when the BayBeh comes out mixed raced coloured
Sunbathing
..Is she trying to cover her tracks for when the BayBeh comes out mixed raced coloured Fifthavenue
Active member
She's already put columnist in her bio. Probably got Craig to write that for her while she finds the pen emoji
Dagenham Dave
Active member
I’m confused! How can OK release a video and photos where she has different heads?? Shouldn’t be allowed
Attachments
annabelle_bronstein
VIP Member
'I lost my appetite for the first three and a half months.' tattle would beg to differ
Pom Bear
VIP Member
Thank you for the new thread and summary..your thread starters are the best on hereCongratulations
Well first things first! I got my very own award from @Pom Bear courtesy of my nomination from @Facehugger: I was thrilled.
Am very happy to do a little recap for my fellow Scrunchies as this is easily the best thread on Tattle. The recap is not as needed as some of the other faster moving threads mostly because Big Loz is essentially a sloth who hurts her front bone if she exerts any energy, but some of us Scrunchies can only dip in and out (like Oddbod in a sink) when their time allows.
We had some very funny detective work
The gender reveal was delayed which gave us more time to consider names and @roseturntupnose made me belly laugh with her suggestions.
It finally arrived today and unsurprisingly she’s having a girl which was spotted by eagle-eyed Tattlers on Valentine’s Day. You had one job Lauren!
Photos of the reveal that she’s not been able to edit show that the Papa John’s are not her friend, particularly not when dressed in shiny fabric wearing an ill-fitting bra.
It seems Big Loz’s dreams of more TV stardom might of been crushed by her foray into Only Fans so she’ll need her beg list even more. She may use the robot vacuum cleaner to pose on.
We did think the Amazon beg list was pretty low until @Glortard discovered she’s going to sell her used undercrackers to the saddos from Only Fans. Baybeh Cantaffordwaitrose will be so proud. At least Moleman can get a workout trying to prise her thong out of that cavernous arse crack, make him work for his commission Big Loz! I feel a bit cockly just thinking about it
We all despaired at her spelling (it’s a bizarre skill to be able to not spell correctly a word that is in the photo you are captioning) particularly when describing her new masterpiece - a cottage pie (sized to feed a small army) that we would have made better in a year 7 home economics lesson and not felt the need to add fucking sweetcorn to - @Blair-Waldorf had very strong feelings about this addition (totally warranted).
The pie was so very dry and needed ‘gravEy’. The spelling on the ingredients list was truly appalling, it killed off @lalalanded
She also *drum roll* made her first ever roast dinner at the age of 34
Surely it’s only a matter of time until she’s on the beg for a reinforced bed frame “for a friend”
She is still totally exhausted from doing sweet FA so needs multiple #nightsoffcooking to bombard the baybeh with more saturated fat, salt and sugar. Greasy pizza possibly eaten with her clacker out with a side order of something turd shaped (and no doubt deep-fried), a giant cookie, and of course a new face.
@Katewinsletsknee perfectly summarised Big Loz’s diet.
The very basic flaw in her plan to have a water birth was spotted by @Sunnydaze101.
@xyzcba discovered her new ‘asfetics’ branding and it’s given me nightmares ever since.
@MrFMercury may have found us out very own group sponsor!
@Silly-old-Slapper summarised what you need to do to officially join the cult of Big Loz.
I was mightily impressed by the poetic talents of the Scrunchies @Blowup80 here and @Noelc here. This led to a brilliant pun.
@pombear did us proud unearthing Oddbod’s catalogue modelling days. Suits you sir! How he may look if Lozza gives him her spaniel’s ears (the tongue out just makes these pictures perfection) and Big Loz does Demi.
Finally, my favourite pic of the thread and yours too
xxGlad you love your trophy..you deserve it
and it's lovely how much my I'm a sweetcorn pic made people happy Facehugger well done on your thread title
xx.Two pics from me today already made...
One for later but first I must put this up as mentioned in the last thread..Loz looking like a beanbag
xx.
Katie8ee
VIP Member
Oh no! Hope your ok poppet just remember it's all going to be ok because at least now Big Loz has someone to practice her rapping/DJ skills with.
