Tanya & Tasha #41 Cancelled Percy pig party? Taco better order another credit card

[Dramallamas]

She claims to have Sjögren’s syndrome but only has a ‘flare’ up when she needs some ego stroking.

Had to Google that and it says symptoms can include an inability to cry tears and a dry fanny. I think there’s a strong possibilty she might actually be telling the truth on this one if that’s the case

 

[Tdm]

Hey fatty. I’m not bitter. Sorry hun, but I guess #youdidntknow. I’m not on my 45th affair, didn’t steal from a former employer, have never lied about having cancer or an auto immune disease, haven’t forced my ex to sell everything to pay off my debt (don’t even have an ex husband!) don’t have kids and dogs who hate me, I don’t belittle my SiL, I don’t post unflattering pictures of my niece, I didn’t have to force my partner to ask me to marry him, or expect my parents to bail me out of every situation I’ve got myself in, I’m not so stupid that I need instructions on my dinner plates, havent humiliated my partner by making him kiddy valentines lunch in the work cafeteria, I’m not a bad bitch, haven’t uploaded a bunch of photos of a poor gentleman’s property going up in flames while praising myself for directing traffic. Anything else hun?

 

[swimming]

#whatdidido #todeservethis

That will always be the number one hashtag hilarity moment from Tranya

Why does trash act like she’s in a yummy mummy, coffee meet up, dropping the kids off at a school in California before heading for a brunch and gym workout with the other posh mums in her Range Rover?

Hun you’re zipping around Halisham in a second hand Ford Kuga sipping a diarrhoea inducing Tesco fridge coffee with 2 rats tails hanging round your ears.

 

[Lord Farquad]

At this point I think that Tasha is genuinely harmless. Lives for her family and Instagram. You have to wonder how she will cope when the kids head off to university or leave home. I think that’s when the pets will come in.

Tanya however, an absolute rotten character. Everything is so painfully false. We give Tasha fresh hell for the ugg boots and joggers at an upmarket restaurant but if anything, that just shows she’s simple. I’m yet to see a genuine post from Tanya.

 

[Dramallamas]

Fucking hell...I think that is my sister in law’s old car - she is in East Kent and chopped it in last weekend Not. Even. Joking.

 

[Letsspillthetea]

Imagine your family being so boring you take the highway code to your birthday meal so you can ignore them

 

[Tabby23]

Exactly that! I used to do that when I was 14 and into brands (remember kookai I would always buy the cheapest T-shirt with Kookai on just for the slogan and the carrier bag), however she’s a middle aged woman! It’s funny because she wants this image of being mrs fancy pants but then all we ever see her wear(when she posts a photo) is George or next clothes! Which are perfectly normal places to get your clothes from but in the mean time she’s such a snob for brands. She’s hilarious. If she wants to try and stand out to influence whilst flashing her cash (or credit card) how bout she tries out eco or UK made clothing? Now that I’d be influenced by!

It reminds me of when I went to Jane Norman as a teenager and bought the cheapest top I could find, just for the carrier bag, to use as my PE bag at secondary school.

 

[tarquin16]

How embarrassing having such a huge lead up and then revealing you’ve bought a cheap second hand car from the nineties that in no circles is considered a classic car. Wait for the pic tomorrow of her claws clutching a coffee cup in it when they take it out for a spin, powered on takeaway farts and nervous debt sweats. Such fun!

 

[PaulSmitt]

Just seen this on Facebook, who does it look like??!!

 

[Badaboom]

You know when you take ALL the stuff off a shelf, so you can clean the shelf and you end up with lots of things piled randomly in one place? That’s what this photo looks like. Too much stuff Tash, too much stuff .

 

[LifeOnInsta]

Is that a whole lime she's shoved in her drink

 

[Crazymum]

I laughed at this comment

 

[Khe91]

Thread title suggestion: ten ton tan and tacky trash, always battling to have the most tat

 

[swimming]

She’ll post tomorrow saying that she’s been rushed to hospital and thank you for all your messages of concern which is usually just one person (Anita)

Maybe we’ll be treated to a photo of her hand with an IV drip line inserted. Or with a hospital tag on her wrist with “thanks for the lovely messages sorry I’ve been quiet it’s been a tough day but my lovely H2B has taken care of everything and washed up a spoon. Feel so grateful and loved”

 

[Mitzymooface]

Thread suggestion

Tan’s old banger’s all for show, Tash bust her hot tub #wedidntknow

 

[Toomuchtat]

She was also pissed up on a shed load of Lambrini and he looked extra good in that skip and even more so when he promised she could buy endless amounts of tat and he wouldn’t bat an eyelid, well not at her anyway

Then suddenly he pulled out the famous “EAT” sign from the bottom of the skip and she fell in love

 

[Maggie28]

I actually laughed her out loud, reading “I have a busy life”
Please fuck off Tan, you work 2 minutes down the road from your shoebox. You have two teenage kids that don’t live at home full time.
You don’t have parents that you look after.
You have no friends, what’s busy? Checking the EB website for more shit to squeeze in the shoebox.
I work full time, I have elderly parents, who’s shopping I do and I see them at least twice a week.
I have children around the same age as yours.
Mine do live at home. I drive them to their weekend jobs and pick them up. We live in the sticks so bus service is crap. I make them get the bus to college and uni. Only one of my kids drives. I have 2 dogs that I walk regularly, I do go running, and I have a demanding full time job.
Yet I still manage to cook, not like you of course.
I am not a cunt. I will chuck sausages and chips in the oven. And I even let my kids choose between beans or eggs. I couldn’t be arsed with a table scape every night. Who has the energy for the meals they cook.
Mind you, tonight we had spag bol, it’s not my signature dish. I don’t use jars. I didn’t have whole baby tomato’s in it either.
I just had normal spaghetti and no JD seasoning crap either.
She is on the beg for Hello fresh to gift her something.
Let’s hope they don’t, because it will be really annoying if they do!
I would say my life is pretty much the same as most people. I do what most people do, and I know there are people with more on their plates than me. So fuck off Tan. Shove your self pity up your fucking arse.

Someone please tell me, what is so busy about Tanyas life? She doesn’t do anything!!

The EB website must be very stressful, imagine she can’t have it all at once. So bless her she has to wait until the minimum payment is paid on the credit cards before she can buy something else.

 

[Kikidoyouloveme]

This is a bit mean, trashas lot REALLLYYYY aren’t a good looking bunch are they ? I’m not sure if it’s the general unhealthy grey hue they give off , the Mismatched outfits or just the general weird vibe of them all, run James , just run! Also tan ....still a twat.

 

[Maggie28]

New beautiful thread for Tanya & Trasha.
Thank you @Toomuchtat for the title.
It was the first one I came across with the most likes.

I’ve have messed up the title
And missed off the T for Tanya. Could someone help me please?

Little recap.
Tanya had her F&M basket out for Easter., bless Taco he got a hot wheels egg.
She keeps having imaginary people over (her kids) for dinner.
She made a huge deal about dressing up as big bird to visit her parents. Made is clear she didn’t want to see the real Ashfords.
Had a meltdown in Morrison’s, and had to be led away. To be comforted by a member of staff.
We all smelled bullshit.
She is averaging at least one take away a week, that we know of.
Taco finally got his ham, egg and chips.
She dressed like a Percy pigs drunk auntie for a night out at a local pub that was at least 6 miles from her shoebox.
She tried to fool us with a Percy pig party, and a Colin the caterpillar day!
She is buying up the White company.
Still buying EB.
She is still a wanker.
As for Trasha... erm erm erm erm
She still erm only erm works erm one hour a week.
She still buys a load of crap, still a shop hopping bastard.
Let’s Dips piss and shit all over the table. While they’re eating their din dins!
Still hasn’t cleaned her grout.
Likes to film her shit food shopping.
Needs binoculars to watch her tv.
Still has a scabby unwashed husband.
They both drink too much, and Trasha will be al fresco eating by the weekend.
Erm I think that’s everything, erm feel free to add.

 

[Letsspillthetea]

Answering emails you should never reply to spam

Wonder if she has long running secret affair with a Nigerian Prince