Jack Monroe #365 I suggest you delete your Tweet

[Mr Krabs]

My cat walked across my keyboard and accidentally opened a Patreon with multiple tiers. Now I’m getting thousands a month in my account and I can’t work out how to login and refund people.

 

[jenny2603]

Oh no fraus. I just put my iPad down on the bed after having a really detailed call to my mortgage broker and when i returned it had accidentally contributed to this thread.

Mate, I don't even know what Tattle is. I just keep sitting on my mobile by mistake and the next thing you know, I'm some sort of VIP member.

 

[Jay-cloth Cow]

Fraus i have some disappointingly weak tea for you..was with my NotHarold adjacent colleague today and she asked her NotHarold based contact a few days ago the last question I'm allowed to ask before she refuses to be my friend anymore I asked if NotHarold ever ate the slop or nuzzled his brother...her (and she said it's ok if i say this, i redacted the relationship before) brother who is friends with NotHarolds brother said he has no idea about slop eating but the brother was at the easter lunch, and apparently Jack was absolutely lovely and very charming to everyone at that gathering - no nuzzling happened but the brother was a bit concerned about how invested she was in the fairly new relationship as she kept calling him her future brother in law. Weak tea but all I can provide I'm afraid!!

 

[traumatised sideboard]

I should probably admit now that I had multiple identical unfortunate accidents involving the stairs in my flat, my cat and my computer keyboard. Before I knew it, my arse had paid for a domain and web hosting and uploaded an entire website coded from scratch with fully functional bots. What am I like

 

[FlowerOfTheEast]

Maybe if she leaves her phone in her bag for long enough, it'll publish the VBI...

 

[Brian Butterfield]

I'm sure Jack is aware and doesn't give a shiny shit, squig.

 

[BlendedSlop]

23rd June - SB expressed "very strongly" that he wants to stay in the bungalow:

16th August - Jack's been discussing a downsize with him for "a good few months" and he's "totally on board and v secure with it":

She really does just make it all up as she goes along, doesn't she?

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

Molly tweet incoming…

 

[missbct]

Spoiler: Me-rail

I know this is nothing to do with Jack, and I'm not a regular poster, but I just wanted to say something to you all.
I'm going through the most horrendous post break up trauma from being with my abusive ex (who is still abusive and manipulative and controlling yardyah) and it's had such a impact on my mentals. I left him last year but I was OK for the first few months until the reality of what I'd experienced and what he did next really hit. It's been fucking horrendous. I've tried so many things to distract myself from the intrusive thoughts, anxiety and ruminations (all legal and not harmful) - obsessive cleaning, rewatching old programmes, avoiding music and books and films, being the best parent I can, work etc. But little has brought me as much joy (and genuinely made me laugh after months of crying and self doubt/guilt) as reading some of the hilarity from you all - even without reference to JM. I've laughed and smiled for the first time in months and it's helped me realise I am such a long way from being properly healed (I contacted a bunch of therapists for my speed dialo's, maybe not three though) and I'm scared and afraid but among all the shit I turn to you funny Fraus to bring a bit of lightness to my life when everything feels crappy. Thank you

Also OT - does anyone know if you can change your Tattle username btw? Send helpo's

 

[Deeznutslol]

Mama? Give over.

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Make it STOP, I swear to god idk if I’m drunk or something but her tweets are absolutely tipping me over the edge tonight why does she make SB out to be such a fucking melt in every single one of her fake fantasy stories? Fuck offff man.
I sent it to my partner who is a seasoned fifa player and he reckons she’s cappin anyway

 

[Swisspea]

Oh no fraus. I just put my iPad down on the bed after having a really detailed call to my mortgage broker and when i returned it had accidentally contributed to this thread.

 

[Goldman]

the retweet!

 

[kachoochoo]

it's all very

me aged 17, texting someone i absolutely meant to text

1st text- hey, you ok? what you up to tonight? xxx

2nd text- omg! so sorry, that was meant for someone else! so, what you doin? xxx

 

[Pocahontas]

Big whoop, you’ve still got two other freezers.

 

[Scaredofbutterflies91]

My first post! Discovered you all in 2020 when Jack was visiting the lovely independent restaurant Dishoom but couldn’t keep up with her chaos. It’s summer holidays so I’ve managed a quick scroll of most of the recaps and am finally up to date.

HOW can she expect anyone to believe this?!

 

[BlendedSlop]

 

[help i need some help!]

Good grief

 

[NomDeGuerre]

Was the meeting held on a bouncy castle? How would she send that many from a bag that was (I presume) stationary.

 

[Winthropp Tuesday]

Account set up this month. These are a couple of her Tweets which are a big giveaway IMO. The other glaring signs are always who she follows.

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The account name, which I won't share is a dig at us and this is the bio. Jack, when you read this - GET HELP. This isn't healthy.

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From same account in reply to Zoe Williams (not squigging her cos she’s a Grauniad journo with a following…)‍

 

[Smeghead]

Our Jackie gets a mention in this indie article about misinformation over energy bills https://inews.co.uk/inews-lifestyle...em-wont-give-consumers-the-full-story-1799948

Here's the bit if you don't want to click. I almost shed a small tear, dear hearts.

The campaigner Jack Monroe was particularly unwise to pursue this course of action
Thread title nomination