Jack Monroe #365 I suggest you delete your Tweet

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I sent a text once that said ‘no penis’. Luckily the recipient was a nice girl I dog sat for, and indeed, none of us did (or does) have a penis.

Anyway, god, the THE DRAMA! Someone please tell her she’s downsizing, not going into the Big House.

Why isn’t she fretting about finding a flat? :chinny reckon:
 
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My cat walked across my keyboard and accidentally opened a Patreon with multiple tiers. Now I’m getting thousands a month in my account and I can’t work out how to login and refund people.
OMG same ... well I don't have a cat but yes it happened to me too... 🤣
 
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I’m hiding in here. Tell her we’re out or something for duck sake
 
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23rd June - SB expressed "very strongly" that he wants to stay in the bungalow:

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16th August - Jack's been discussing a downsize with him for "a good few months" and he's "totally on board and v secure with it":

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She really does just make it all up as she goes along, doesn't she?
 
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at least she didn’t claim that she dropped her phone in the sea i suppose.
 
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Exactly--the odds of her iPhone randomly sending texts that are made up of actual words? There are 7,893,600 possible combinations five letters using the English alphabet. There are about 9,000 five letter words in English. So, the odds aren't good just for one word. Much less a string of "randomly" typed words.
Not only that, but for her phone to randomly go onto Twitter, select a tweet and either select retweets or respond option and then actually correctly type out a response then presumably press to send that tweet, all the while Jack was talking and or listening and or sharing rock biscuits is really quite something.
 
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On the “complete words” controversy with the bag typing, it seems plausible to be fair.

The word suggestions that pop up above your keyboard could potentially be pocket dialled?

If I just randomly tap the middle word suggestion it comes out as:

“You are a great friend and you can get it from the other end to end your day off with a good day.”

Not sure how gifs then end up in the mix though.
 
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Is she on the breadline or is she not? (Rhetorical question, obviously!) Because that's a lot of sellable stuff she's just given away
The egg chairs have been rotting in her rotten garden for at least a year, wrecked probably.

She's admitted a few times she lets things get liquified rotten in her fridge, so just bleurgh to any white goods off her.

The BBQ was probably filthy too. I have no evidence for this, but she seems the type. She's passed off junk without getting done for fly tipping.
 
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You've got to hand it to her, serious questions are being asked about her honesty all over Twitter and she carries on regardless, yet is mortified by some Tweet about beavers. She's a howling idiot.
Counting jumpers and pans, acting like charity shops accept smiles as currency.

It doesn't matter where you bought something if you live beyond your means.
 
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