Jane Gammons #22 Cats pee to Jackson Bay, Charlie's mum's sent away, all going Chins way

[PairyMoppins]

Call me mad...(I probably am) but I signed up to FM World to get a bit of extra cash for Christmas. Had no idea about all this stuff until I got involved in it. I work full-time but decided to give it a go. Every little helps as they say!
Anyway long story short, I can confirm that this is just one big scam. I got sent all the info (if you can call it that) You get sent some PDF's about matching numbers to high end scents. Telling you that you are an official FM distributor. FB page link to training page which is invite only. There they tell you a little about it all, then tell you not to ask questions, turning off comments on posts if anyone dares to!
I purchased the 'personalised website' which was basically the same words all over it, looked exactly the same with my name at the top instead of just a number. That really is a pathetic attempt at making you think they are helping YOU out. £54 for that. They give you the big sell spiel about how the so-called business partners came from having nothing to making all this money each month, all sounds great until you realise that it's only because they are recruiting/calling themselves an 'upline'. It literally IS a pyramid scheme. The only winners are those who are higher up in the triangle. Those at the bottom are struggling to make ends meet and even BUYING goods from each other, making up stories in WhatsApp groups to try and get customers. Faking the balloon pops etc. Faking the custom. Looking for ways to sell more by doing 'special offers' which is leaving them out of pocket with NO profit after selling them so cheaply to actually be able to shift the stock they have bought! On top of that having to pay £6 each time for delivery. Some of the girls have been waiting since the beginning of August for what should have been in stock. Customers waiting for that long is just downright wrong! You order something, pay for it, you want to receive it! Stock the girls are ordering is turning up damaged. When it arrives, they are delivering or giving to customers (even people they know personally) and being told that the fragrances smell fuck all like they claim to! FM keep telling them the profit margins are in the millions, well they will be won't they, raking it in from dickheads (yes, including myself in this) who believe that this is really a legit way to make extra cash and are helping them to rake it in. Half the time you are stuck in a queue for more than an hour at a time and if you refresh the page at the wrong time, you go right back to the start. The lowest I was ever in a queue was 2361, which is ridiculous! Bearing in mind that they open the website (yes, you read that right) at 8am. By 9am I was still waiting. They can't even get samples? I mean WTAF?
How is anyone supposed to know if they like a scent if they can't try it.
Well, this story isn't as short as I was hoping to make it lol..
I have taken screenshots of EVERYTHING (as you do) emailed FM today to tell them that I want a full refund for 'my' website I paid for, stating that if they should refuse. I will contact Ofcom and trading standards. Simply disgusting.
Just to add, I had a few quid spare at the time so wasn't too bothered about losing it. Still not arsed, It's more the principal.

The only dupe in this company is the BS 'be your own boss' tagline.

Good god! I should write a book.

 

[lexiloo]

Welcome to another thread folks and thanks to @FavouriteChild for the cracking title, had to change it slightly to get it to fit, hope its ok!

update from last thread......

Jane has gone back to starting work at 6am instead of 3am as she was feeling tired all the time as she's so so busy running her cat pee empire guys!
Charlies mum is suffering and its easy to see how much Jane dislikes her and how she can't be bothered helping out, spills all his mums details all over you tube yet keeps her own family very private.
Claims to be back to calorie counting but the lack of content about it, ever expanding face and new chins for her collection show she's on an infinite number with it!
She keeps making income claims about her MLM "biznizz" which are farcical and against rules tut tut janeykins, tut tut
Her and Charlie are characters in her "friends" new novel, we think the title may be......mukbang at beachy head for beginners

looking forward to what comes next.....tattle on folks

 

[Bumblebea123]

Well, well, well ... just watched the taste test: these two really ought to just STOP eating. If you can’t be bothered to watch it, or fancy a summary, then read on my friend.
Firstly, let’s confront the elephant(s) in the room: Chins declares that they’ve put on weight. Not just weight, but ‘a lot’ of weight. We all know therefore, that there really has been some mega munchin’ afoot. This of course is abundantly obvious because once again, she looks like she’s been over-inflated by a balloon pump and let’s just say, if she were involved one of those sumo wrestling games where fat suits are often worn to add to the fun, the costume wouldn’t be necessary. The Bean isn’t much better: he’s round and pudgy and yes, he’s definitely been on that bloody soreeeeeeeen loaf again. He’s MASSIVE. I’ve also noticed that the comb-over is making a return - possibly this is designed to attempt to camouflage the weight gain on the top of his head?



I am being unkind, but I’m so fed up with the utter rubbish that’s spouted by this pair of pigs.

Chins then pronounces a decree: things are changing. Things are not a changin’. There is no progress being made. It’s all flannel. They’re once again in a sea of food, sinking deeper and deeper towards the bed. Please don’t bore us with the calorie countin’ rubbish: we ain’t a listenin’.

Anyway, in the same breath, we learn that despite things changing, they are in fact staying exactly the same because they’ve got some free food and it MUST be eaten. It must be eaten before they are ‘submersed’ (Chins’s made up word, of two actual words, mixed together) presumably into the calorie count in’ charade once again. Turning it away is/was NOT an option. It’s not the fault of Chins and Bean, it’s the fault of Schnack Surpwises. This evil company has spotted Chins and Bean on YouTube, noted that they are both hopelessly devoted to food and decided to exacerbate the problem by sending them more things to scoff. Not helpful. It’s ok though, because they are schnacks a plenty from ‘awound the world’.

As usual, there’s a brief nod to ‘everythink that’s been goin’ on’: basically, what Chins is saying, is that they don’t know where their next meal is coming from these days and did you know that having a SS box is an ‘activity’, a bit like going to a spin class or maybe taking up Zumba. Oh, please!!!

Chins thinks that a box from SS would make a lovely gift and she tells us she knows plenty of pigs, sorry, people, who would enjoy a box like this. Still, this one is all for them and of course, it’s one of the big ones. The greedy pair can’t get their mits in quickly enough. The Bean is in charge of using the pink toddler scissors to enter the box of delights. And in they go, like gannets to the feast.

Oooh, the box is from Sweden! What a small world: Chins and Bean can’t believe that the chest of drawers next to which they are squashed, is from IKEA and that’s Sweden innit! So, it’s meant to be, isn’t it. There’s a brief scan of the leaflet, which is very helpful, because when they’ve had foreign food previously, they haven’t known what they’ve been eating, apparently. Doesn’t stop them though, does it!! This isn’t complicated like say, Caribbean food. They can see what they’ve got here. And there’s lots of it: rubbish!

First up, it’s cheesy cwisps. The Bean can’t wait to stick his great big nose into the pack, like an antelope snuffling along the ground for witchetty grubs. Oooh they taste just like a ‘thin’ Wotsit. This means they’re wivin’ their caloreeeees, I suppose.

The Bean is stuffing them into his gob, whilst Chins pretends to be dainty, just taking one or two.

Next up, its more crisps. After much crunching and nibbling, sampling and then sampling again, just to make sure, these too are a resounding ‘mmm’. You might notice at this point that the Bean seems even to have gained weight on his fingers, as we see them greedily grabbing for more and more crisps.

A packet of sweets is next on the list. Chins boldly claims that they ‘won’t get through it all’ but we all know she is famous for wildly underestimating her own abilities. I’d bet my house on the entire lot disappearing within a matter of hours; minutes maybe. But wait, there’s a problem. The Bean can’t summon up the strength to open the bag. His porky fingers grasping at it, hopelessly, he pulls a sort of sex face and then resorts to the child’s scissors. Phew, they’re in. This bit made me laugh: the sweets are described by Chins as pink skulls, that taste like freshly picked raspberries! Firstly, I’m not sure how she would be familiar with the taste but secondly, this is ingenious! Who needs fruit?! Just have sweets instead. The Bean isn’t fussed about the raspberry sweets but it’s ok, because Chins is a big fan. She won’t let them go to waste. And once again, it’s just like eating a bit of fruit innit.

Then there are more sweets and a revolting bit which involves both piggies picking bits from their teeth and licking their trotters.

There is then something that calls itself a sandwich, but alas, it is a cracker masquerading as a sandwich. Oh well, never mind. The Bean gets his mouthful curtesy of Chins shoving it in for him. He doesn’t like it because it’s (wait for it) ‘too processed’, at least I think that’s what he said, because his mouth was full. Nice. Chins, seizing the opportunity, takes another bite. Well it is food isn’t it, so she’s going to have it. She’s mildly disappointed that the Bean doesn’t like it because she has had a vision of him whipping one out for a ‘brunch’ at work.

The next contender is a sweet fizzy drink. It’s of course Swedish and the Bean does a sort of Welsh accent which is a bit cringe because it’s meant to be Swedish. Chins doesn’t like it because it isn’t sweet enough.

She’s then done a little segment which is set over an instrumental. Basically it’s an excuse for them to stop talking and eat more and more. There’s chcolit, cake bars, more sweets ... you get the picture. Then surprisingly, the music stops and an item is described as ‘vile’. I’m not sure what it’s done to offend so greatly, but it’s cast aside and I actually think, despite it being food, it might stand a small chance of survival. At least until later anyway.

As the video draws to a close, the porky pair can contain themselves no longer and they basically stuff their faces simultaneously, talking with their mouths full and grasping and fighting over the scraps, like two playful bear cubs. I realise with horror that this, for them, is a kind of strange foreplay; a mating ritual if you will.

There’s a bit more finger sucking and tooth poking, Chins says she feels sick, they thank the company for their big box of stuff (you can get small boxes but theirs was a big box), and then it all gets too much and they presumably go off for a bonk and a vom.

 

[JDo777]

Janeychins your response when approached by the snack company should’ve been “Thank you for the offer but my husband and I are trying to adopt a healthier lifestyle, could you perhaps offer this gift to a family comprising of more than two people who would be able to give a varied response to the snacks from the perspective of different age ranges?” But of course those words aren’t in in Greedy Grabalot’s vocabulary or thought process, if it’s free and food she’s on the front row and unable to refuse!

 

[Emperortooco]

Well I,m back, bit of a shitter this time of the year for me peeps as I lost my mum to breast cancer the same thing that will have its way with me one day! at this time of the year plus it would,ve been her birthday so yea September and beginning of October fucks me up so if I disappear again I will be back, saying that the blob hasn’t been exactly “living her best life “ has she. Don’t you just hate that phrase. Why put pissing sequins in those shitty plastic named bottles that she,s started to flog, entrepreneur my arse !!! Fucking bellend more like !

 

[lexiloo]

swallowed some mouthwash and they're googling to see if its dangerous? is she for real? what an absolute melon!! how are these two allowed to live alone with no parental supervision??

 

[monga]

Thread : FM ,stickers and Tat aplenty but Charlies bank accounts completely empty

 

[lexiloo]

how can she seriously sit there moaning she's the biggest she's ever been and then follow it up with a scoffing junk vlog? could have stacked a pound or two on from hoovering all those snacks up! who wants to see blimp n blob stuffing various snacks in their pie holes

 

[Marj24]

Be thankful she didn't invest in a tattoo gun kit, it'd be like...

 

[JoeNotExotic]

Couldn't catch it all because her fingers were moving on the delete button faster than Usain Bolt

 

[Beggars belief]

Run down of members video...

- asked if she can reduce her hours at Tesco. Managers very understanding apparently, she reduces down in a few weeks.
- Admits she is the heaviest weight she’s ever been ( but then says she too scared to get on the scales )
- had a pamper session in her “other” bathroom ready for their little break (think they go on Saturday?) got to get the flat ship shape because they have someone popping in to check on the flat for them! But then keeps saying they are only going for a couple days?!
- enjoying her new gadget the printing thing, but still very busy with FM (of course you are lol)

so your basically not missing anything lol

 

[FavouriteChild]

Welcome to another thread folks and thanks to @FavouriteChild for the cracking title, had to change it slightly to get it to fit, hope its ok!

update from last thread......

Jane has gone back to starting work at 6am instead of 3am as she was feeling tired all the time as she's so so busy running her cat pee empire guys!
Charlies mum is suffering and its easy to see how much Jane dislikes her and how she can't be bothered helping out, spills all his mums details all over you tube yet keeps her own family very private.
Claims to be back to calorie counting but the lack of content about it, ever expanding face and new chins for her collection show she's on an infinite number with it!
She keeps making income claims about her MLM "biznizz" which are farcical and against rules tut tut janeykins, tut tut
Her and Charlie are characters in her "friends" new novel, we think the title may be......mukbang at beachy head for beginners

looking forward to what comes next.....tattle on folks

This is very exciting. My first ever title

 

[Sweatybetty]

Why would you get an online food delivery when you work in a supermarket ? She really is so stupid

 

[lexiloo]

so if they've gone on another OAP getaway im guessing we can expect a run down of all the things she's taken with them from home, lets not forget when they stayed at the lodge last year and had a shopping delivery there yet still took all the following items from their cupboards at home.......for a four day break (yes I went back to watch and list as it was so so funny)

food scales
gravy mix
peanut butter
part used box of stuffing
salt grinder
pepper grinder
washing up liquid
kitchen roll
washing powder
bin liners
cloth
wipes
tea towels
CHOPPING BOARD
oxo cubes
tomato puree
pasta
tealights
cereal bars
xmas mugs
straws
grenade bars
wax melt burner
fairy lights
candles
potatoes
teapot
foil
sauces

 

[lexiloo]

When me and my husband were the gammons age we also had no children at that point so saturday nights were either a lovely meal out, drinks with friends around the bars in town, giggles and cocktails down the local, take away & film at home or dirty weekend away where as the trotter and the rotter are peeing their pants laughing at the dishwasher having too many bubbles! and they accuse us of being jealous........

 

[Sweatybetty]

Ffs really well we know it’s a 40p glass and will smash as soon as you wash it , this thing has no shame !

 

[wotdidijustwatch]

Their holidays are like Saga holidays.

Sing it to Clif Richard Summer Holiday....

Jane and Bean on a Saga holiday, stuff their faces for a week or two. Overeating on a Saga holiday is their dream come truuuuee, a pukka pie or twooo

 

[lexiloo]

that vlog is awful, firstly that shirt she bought which of course she reckons is too big is from the charity shop that day and she's wearing it! ewwwww! she thinks she's hysterical and keeps doing the mutley laugh, she tells all charlies mums business again and thinks Charlie is an amazing son.....really????? wow!
she's cut her days at Tesco, which means she's just cut her borrowing ability for a mortgage too, less hours = less lending! she is totally thick to not have realised her FM earnings won't count with lenders for a couple of years at least! I don't get how she is so so busy she can't get anything done when she's home from mid morning and has the rest of the day, evening and all weekend to get stuff done. Also how many times does she say "you know" it drove me bonkers
I do not understand how so many people love this pair, her comments section is full of people kissing the gammon rump, why do they not see what a selfish pair of lazy fecks they are????

 

[Sweatybetty]

Always winds me up when they say I was gifted this but it’s not an AD , of course it’s a bloody AD you are advertising it for them that’s why they sent you it ! Not as if they looked at her and thought well she looks starved let’s send her some grub plump her up a bit

 

[monga]

a very yorkshire brothel, there were 2 episodes, this was what was on offer........

View attachment 236166

Jesus it's a cross between Tan and Ozzy Osbourne