Her sat in the car wittering on that I should just ignore my other responsibilities and put myself at the top of the list made me realise just how sheltered/blinkered/self obsessed she is.
I hear you. I am in a situation quite similar to yours (though currently on maternity leave and thus able to rant about Amelia during the day
). I have to say that this "put yourself first" business is one of the biggest weaknesses of the whole self-care movement for me, because it assumes that we are all self-sacrificing saints until someone tells us to have a candle-lit bubble bath. Now I am not preaching self-sacrifice, and I'm certainly no altruistic saint, nor did I ever strive to be one. It's a choice. I had the luxury to choose a career path and a family situation and now I have that life and it's good, but I am not holding my breath for it to be perfect and never stressful. Whatever you choose in life, it's never all about you. There will always be a sense of responsibility for others, and that's a good thing. I absolutely don't understand how in this day and age, where everyone online blabbers on about their feelings incessantly, people got to the idea that we have stopped putting ourselves first. Rather, I feel that the people who talk about this the most are overindulging themselves - and again, I am not coming from a steely sense of duty perspective, I procrastinate with the best of them when I can. But Amelia is the very worst example of this overindulging herself. She would greatly benefit from no longer asking herself if she feels like doing every little damn thing and just get it done instead. She'd free up a lot of her time and nerves.
Also, while I appreciate good food, a nice glass of wine and pampering myself as much as the next person, I think working for some savings and a proper income, and caring a bit more for the people that might be there for her on the next rainy day would be better self-care for Amelia than the umpteenth damn sheet mask.
. Just my opinion.
