Hi,
I'm a new member, although i have been lurking on here reading the posts since R's first outburst about this site a few weeks ago. I came on to see whether what she was saying is right and found that actually she couldn't be further from the truth. What I read was well balanced questions and concerns which in my eyes are totally acceptable, especially from those who have donated money and wish to know where the funds have gone to.
I want to be clear I am not defending her but I've read that some people think not all these things would happen to one person, i agree about her always being the right place to be a hero as that's just beyond coincidental but as for negative things, my life for the first 30 years has been a series of car crashes, usually down to decisions family members have made which has then intertwined with my life. And the impact of those things has led me to making decisions that have not been for the best. I have said to my one friend who has stood by me the whole time that if I was to write a book or tell someone chronologically What's happened they wouldn't believe me! As some of it is just beggars belief! But anyway I digress, due to smarter decisions and distancing myself I've been able to forage a nice life for myself and my little family.
I have followed PTWM for a few years now I think, I brought the book but never donated. I think I took everything she said as a pinch of salt tbh as an internet personality as she obviously does things for likes and getting her brand out there. But the DV work she was doing inspired me. When I read about her asking for donations I assumed she would use the money to provide things such as emergency accomadation, help with moving costs, clothes etc for people who have fled with nothing, maybe a small admin amount. If I had been a regular donator I would have expected a breakdown, not breaching confidentiality but for example:
This quarter: £xxx was used for emergency accomdation, £xxx was used for food, we helped xx warriors and xx babies. (I don't like the term warriors, I survived DV and I'm a survivor not a warrior, women's aid recommends the term survivors I think?)
I worked in IT up until 18 months ago and now work in social care (transferable skills ftw!) So I feel I can comment on a few things....
Getting people into refuges - I personally think that's bull, I work with families who need immediate refuge places but there aren't any a lot of the time, anywhere in the country. I am a professional who works with other professionals who's goal is safeguarding, keeping parents and children safe. And we can't even get places so how does R, just a person off the street manage?
Josh assisting at an RTC they were passing - again not defending but this is possible. Police, fire and those in the medical profession have a duty of care and have a oath of sorts that says even if they are off duty if they pass an accident they stop to help, they may be sent on their way but if they are found to knowingly pass without offering help they can be struck off. My mum is a nurse and my dad a doctor (cliche I know!) And I remember times as children when we would stop at an accident before services arrived and they would tell us to lock the doors and they would go and help until they were no longer needed. I can't comment on R's involvement as I have no idea what passers by do in these situations.
Instagram IP addresses - for starters IP addrrsses dont mean much, they give a vague location, they dont track individual users down. The only time instagram will get involved is if they are asked to by the police. The police will only get involved is if its a serious crime or if there is significant risk of harm. If she thinks she can get people reported/prosecuted without evidence she is mistaken. The police won’t be interested unless it’s a serious crime, they are so underfunded/staffed they have their hands completely full will bigger things than social media. She should know that being married to PC J.
The boys mum - in my experience courts do not remove children from a parent unless something very serious has gone on. The mum would have had representation as social care have to ensure all parties are represented so as not to have bias in a case which could lead to a case being thrown out or appeal. I have seen mums petition on change.org and it's all very sad, however none of us know if it's all true, what really happened or what is in the boys best interests. We don’t really know who wrote it and it was only up for a few days. Sometimes courts have to decide which parent is the “lesser of the two evils” so to speak, so awarding custody to R & J doesn't mean that they are good parents, it just means the children are less likely to come to harm in their care compared to being with mum. It's a sad state of affairs but is preferable to foster care. I'm not sure what starting a petition would achieve, I don't know of any organisations that can help in Devon with contact but if someone does maybe they could list them here with the hope that sam or someone close to her reads it.
I think both their behaviour is atrocious, her for doing it and him for supporting her in it. I can't help but feel that their is DV in the form or control and coercion with regards to J. (Her against him). I completely support the truth coming out and think that one day very soon she is going to come undone.
I feel most sorry for the 6 children living in this mess and what will happen to them when it all comes out. What will happen when no money is coming in now neither parent is working? What kind of lives must they be living totally exposed to the public, including their peers. There is no safeguarding at all for the poor children, R clearly has no idea.
I could go on and on but this is enough of a rant for now! I hope I don't get blocked for this! I am really not in support of them.
X