Ok this is really long but I tried
Nay recap - for anyone new here:
Covidiot
Has a full time nanny and cleaner x2 weekly so she can go to the gym, get her hair done, get her lashes done, go out for coffee, go out for lunch,
get out of the house and away from her children.
Uses chavvy acronyms and made up words such as ovvy for ovulating, stennies for extensions and jallys for jalapeños
Always complains about her children and how they act up (rather than realising her own absence makes them want her time, attention and love more)
Whenever she has to have a day alone with the kids, usually a Sunday, she’ll claim it’s a bad/funny/difficult day and order tons of takeaway and junk
Regularly goes on “date nights” to the most glamorous bas Vegas in Basildon - usual haunts include wagas, Nando’s and sprinkles
Still has the most atrocious diet as do the children, dominoes on speed dial - not sure they know what a vegetable is but they eat pizza every day, even took it in their picnic to the beach!
Has the most horrdenous “fashion sense” aka chav central from Camden market vibes
claims she has no family nearby or support but Papa Banjo takes Cass to football every Wednesday (confirmed by Jordan) and is regularly round theirs. Has been shown more since lockdown lifted so suspect she hid him previously.
got her teeth done with
Jordan’s her own money and now resembles donkey from shrek
regularly goes on about being happy, being free, being kind but proceeds to appear really unhappy and unkind
often shows her children upset, hurt or crying instead of comforting them, got to get the content for the gram somehow
most time with the kids is either trapped in the eyesore, jumbled, packed full of toys playroom or strapped into the buggy at a shopping centre
stuffs the children into bed at 6pm when the nanny clocks off and complains at their 5am wake ups. Both kids still have afternoon naps too
spends all of her time when out anywhere getting 100s of shots to then upload in a carousel, to reshare each individual photo onto her stories
she will post a story, that Jordan reshares, and then she reshares and then he reshares and then she reshares (you get the picture)
loves to ensure her nipples, boobs or vagina are in most story shots
THREAD RECAP:
Threw Cass a 3rd birthday party and had it indoors against Covid restrictions. Tried and failed to hide it. Multiple households attended and were all inside as it rained. Banjo clan all tried to make out they were glad about lockdown and restrictions easing to try and cover their tracks (Ashley on good morning Britain and Jordan on his kiss radio show however Fran posted photos of the kids together at Rose’s birthday, same outfits, during lockdown to wish Cass happy birthday
)
Apparently got her hair done and had “stennies” tattle agree it looks no different, still limp and thin
Went to legoland for Cass’s birthday - nay spent the entire time posing for photos, Jordan spent a fortune in the Lego shop as documented by a huge bag because that makes them “good parents” then posted they were at Starbucks in the car while the kids slept at 2pm, so hardly a day out at all
Still claiming she is so so so busy when she has a full time nanny and is barely at home
Still too busy to wash and change her clothes after the gym so goes to lunch and spends the rest of the day in her sweaty gym gear and Bally’s
Changed their mind about the guard dog. No longer getting Sergio with the docked ears (public backlash too much to handle?) but now getting one called Mishka. They haven’t admitted this publicly but is clear from the dog Instagram account @ambassadorprotectiondogs
nay made a huge deal in thread 2 but hasn’t mentioned since, that Cass decided to potty train “his self” and drop the dummy because he was SO ready, but he is regularly seen with a nappy on and a dummy at various times of the day. He is due to start prep school in September and appears to have a dummy mouth, poor speech and just generally seems quite behind for his age. There appears to be no attempts to help him progress before September. It seems she was more trying to compete with Fran (Ashley’s wife) who was potty training their daughter Rose, 2 at the time
complains that when she drags them to a shopping centre they misbehave and have meltdowns. Doesn’t seem to understand her children or their needs at all. Let Cass run around the shopping centre with wet bottoms on (guessing he had wet himself and she let him carry on rather than drying him or changing him)
wedding save the dates went out. They are getting married august 2022. Nay declared “it’s really happening” because she thinks Jordan can’t back out now
did a q&a and came across like a right twat as always. Claimed she doesn’t want to be away from her children for a honeymoon but they’ll be going away without them for TEN DAYS! Tried to defend their decision to have a nanny full time while she avoids her children by saying anyone who could, would do the same. Tattle consensus is we would rather look after our own children if money was no object. She also answered a question about their home saying they have NEVER rented. Seemed to think renting is beneath them as they have ALWAYS owned their houses.
took mimi to her ballet class (may 18th, they’ve been going again since it restarted) but then removed mimi and took her home as she was running around, no doubt excited to be doing something for her rather than for nay, mimi is usually always strapped into the buggy. Mimi hasn’t been back since that we’ve been shown and nay claimed mimi was ill and that’s why she played up
nay’s parents came to stay and rather than spend time with them, she left them with the kids and stayed in bed for an entire day as she was poorly
after her day in bed nay got her lashes done and went out in London for the evening with her friends, wore a trashy chavvy outfit, had matching prada bags, got in at 2am Sunday morning and then back up at 7:30am for the gym
a whole week after the ballet class, nay is still claiming Mimi is ill and so is she. All symptoms still indicate could be Covid but no mention of getting a test and they still went out and about mixing. Symptoms described included sore throat, a fever, cough, up all night.
nay said the doctors insisted Mimi went into the surgery (despite all advice being to not attend with Covid symptoms
) she was checked over and told it was viral and that if nay had any concerns to take Mimi to a&e immediately
despite this situation, nay still had a friend over for a takeaway on the Thursday night. On the Friday, nay had another day in bed while the nanny took Mimi to the park, Cass went to football training and then that evening nay had 5 friends round for another takeaway! Two friends have young babies!
Saturday started with nay saying she was still so ill and having another day in bed, leaving Jordan with the children. A few hours later however they were on their way into London. They went to Hansel & gretels where nay posted a carousel of photos, not only without a mask on inside but with Cass desperately trying to pull away, disinterested and not looking at the camera
a few tattlers complained to nay’s management about her behaviour, her refusal to isolate with Covid symptoms or take a test or wear a mask, but none of us heard anything back
the mask less photos kept disappearing. We aren’t sure if she deleted due to backlash or if it was Instagram. She later claimed Instagram was playing up and she couldn’t upload it without a caption
that evening, she was unusually quiet and didn’t even post about Jordan being on the masked dancer
she was unusually quiet again on the Sunday until Jordan whisked her away for a £29 a night premier inn night away from their children. Although they never said what the stay was in aid of, it seemed more likely to be for their new guard dog mishka as the Instagram posted about her meeting mum and dad. They limited comments but both nay and jord commented.
on Tuesday nay took the kids for a insta Hun mum meet up at the farm. Mimi was strapped into the buggy as usual as nay openly admits she can’t take the kids out alone but Cass was free to roam
the hot weather arrived and nay had a paddling pool for the children set up. She filmed lots of stories including one where Cass had a hosepipe aimed at Mimi’s face who subsequently slipped and fell into the water. Tattle agreed nay didn’t react like a normal parent when Mimi’s face was full of shock at the water and falling down and she needed comfort. Nay didn’t even ask or check if she was ok but carried on filming
nay claimed she never wanted to be a character mum and let her children wear clothes with characters on, but seems to have forgotten that a month ago her sons birthday party was character themed
at the weekend Jordan and nay went to London. The lunch was for nay’s bridesmaids complete with tacky chavvy cards, cakes and cocktails. Nay doesn’t seem to have any genuine friends to ask, so asked a couple of insta Hun mums, Fran banjo and talisa banjo. As previously discussed on threads it doesn’t seem Jordan’s side of the family are all that keen on nay. When tattle questioned who these friends were, the friends were quick to post why they were bridesmaids
Jordan was nearby to take photos and then her and Jordan went out for more food and cocktails and stayed overnight. This was heavily documented with non stop stories at every single moment from both of them. On Sunday nay spent another day in London, eating and drinking and trying on wedding dresses with the evans twin mum while Jordan prepared for the BAFTAs. Nay went home but of course got back just as the children were going to bed
claimed she wanted to heal trolls and speak to them, so she could help guide them in the right direction
still saying she can’t believe how little stress there is for their wedding when she’s previously admitted to having a whole wedding “production team”
got invited to a base children’s clothing event with other insta Hun mums and left her children at home although other children were there
had a full on water fight with Jordan including spraying it into the house, yet last week wouldn’t let Cass do this and kept telling him to stop while she hid inside the house with the door closed
nay posted a photo posing provocatively in the paddling pool next to Cass
a comment appeared saying that nay hadn’t had kids with her figure to which nay lapped up. The commenter then added they called nay the queens of mums and jord the queen of dads. Tattle are convinced this is a wind up and can’t possibly be the true thoughts of someone
nay took the children to the beach and proceeded to document every single second, wander far from the children while they were in the sea and make sure she got all the bikini shots in while wearing a bandana. The kids even had pizza at the beach and Jordan said the bandana made her look like captain jack sparrow
at the weekend they managed to take the children to the park. Nay was dressed as a rapper from the 90s in banana yellow and when Mimi fell into a cold muddy puddle, instead of getting her out, they all proceeded to laugh at her while she was visibily upset and nay filmed it. They left Mimi in the same wet clothes for the rest of the park trip
Sunday was Father’s Day where nay had to be with the children alone all day, but managed to upload every single photo of Jordan with the kids and then ended with her saying she had been quiet and alluding to the fact she’d found it hard being with the children all day alone and she wished she had family closer.
Far too many date nights to include. Tattle are getting more and more confused about one of her eyebrow having a life of its own, it’s always raised and is creating a wrinkle but nay has previously offered £20 to someone so they could get their nails done after they messaged about her wrinkles
be kind and all that, pozzy vibes only
