Ellie Grey #5 Wake me up before you go GLO

[chipface121]

Vacancy: Conspiracy Influencer.

Salary: Whatever you can scrounge off your followers



Skills Required:

Lack of knowledge on relevant subject matter

Ability to cross sell MLM products shamelessly

Must be adept at using block buttons and not engaging in factual debate

Acting ability preferred: Should be able to do sarcastic frowns and cry on camera. Try to play the victim as much as possible

Multiple pseudonyms needed

Hypocrisy essential!!


Dress code:

Underwired bras (carefully concealed)

Black vest tops

No suncream!

Teeth must be cleaned with Colgate



Extra Curricular activities considered:

Promoting milky breasts online

Poor songwriting




Benefits:

Not having to pay tax

Free healthcare for any ailment you’ve made up*

Be your own boss. Don’t like something? Block them!

Always being right. Echo chambers work wonders for the self esteem

Free dog for a month

*excluding skin cancer



Please note! The following will not be considered for the position:

Logical/critical thinkers
Anyone with a GCSE or higher in the relevant subject matter

Anyone fluent in the English language

Anyone in possession of a moral compass

 

[alexkent8930]

I’ve followed Ellie for a few months. Mainly so I can laugh at her and have the opportunity of seeing a car crash for real. Last night, I decided to google her and came across tattle. I spent a good couple of hours going through the forums and you lot made my furlough that little bit better.

The highlight for me was her poor mans onlyfans photos where she’s taking a massive piss in a shower and trying to sell her milk in bulk. I had to sign up to join in on the fun! (Tattle that is)

thank you all and remember, we are the 99% and it’s all about CONTROOOOOOOOL

 

[standupsitdown]

Lieys unstoppable, she’s like a force of nature. You can’t keep a good grifter down. Just like a floater

As someone said before, as long as she stops trying to kill people and abuse the NHS and their staff, we don’t care what she does.

It would be lovely if this thread became obsolete, but I for one would miss the hilarious lolz, and the characters here present. You’ve all made this intolerable situation a lot more tolerable.

 

[thatdeafcow]

Deep breath and I may regret this:

A friend on my Instagram encouraged me to take a look at Ellie grey’s insta to become more informed so I requested to follow and WOW. I’m a newbie to tattle and so I suppose my question is first- what the actual f*** is this person, and 2) can someone briefly summarise who this person is, or kindly do a wiki. I worked on ICU during the peak and have just completed extra training to help supervise vaccination clinics so you can imagine my despair discovering these tin foil hat pricks.

thank you in advance.

 

[Northernoik2020]

Ahem, So, after Spry Crisp and Dry dropped her like a stone, she went quiet, for all of a couple of days. She’s back, but Official PTTP is dead. She’s been posting a fair bit of ‘elf’ advice, including refusal of screening, breast cancer advice. ‘Someone’ alerted a breast cancer surgeon who is also a breast cancer patient to her shite. She put Liey back in her box, but Liey came out fighting and the good doc had a few of Liey’s trolls come for her.

Dr Ranj, tv doc, he’s been on Liey’s radar too, he called her out.

Her payment pages are down - some clever ass has had it removed. Bravo.

The GLO is still a mystery.

She went to the marches last weekend. And that’s about it.

Oh, she’s still a cunt. Nearly forgot.

 

[HotDiggettyDang]

It’s his age 99 and the 9th. Upside down.

Hence deeply symbolic- of how if you take some letters, and remove some letters, and add some numbers, and stand on your head whilst someone slathers your arse with a mashed avocado, you get the Illuminati.

 

[Shelb]

She’s clearly completely obsessed with us.

To be fair I don't blame her. I am obsessed with us we are great

 

[standupsitdown]

Liey literally just had a childcare expert contact her to commend her on her parenting skills and say that her parenting was the best parenting they had ever seen, and how they could learn a thing or two about child psychology from her.

 

[scandi2]

My biggest takeaway from last season of Life of lies - Ellie Grey, was that she thinks she knows more about tits than a breast surgeon. THE AUDACITY

 

[DavidJ]

Did the full body thermo scan happen? Think she was going to document it...

Yeah it was bad news, they didn't find a brain or a personality.

 

[FatFelix]

Empty Victory

The truthers and the warriors are meeting in a pub.
To Share heroic stories over drinkies and some grub.
“I’ll take some note says Ellie, so there isn’t any mystery.
When the revolutions over and they’re writing up our history”

In comes Louise Hampton, shes late but loves the fuss.
She couldn’t read the invite or the number on the bus.
Theres a crackle on a laptop ‘Beebas in the room’.
She cant afford a ticket so she’s joining in on zoom.

They’ll wish they’d not invited her Cos Beebas on the cadge.
Roasting in the sunshine with a crystal up her vag.
Hasn’t got a clue that the kids are near a cliff.
Shes waiting for some matches for lighting up her spliff.

Walton says “ill tell you how I made these tyrants fall.
I took my megaphone shopping and I called a lady small.
I think I made my point that day and know that we had fun.
And the shops were really grateful that I didn’t have a gun”.

Jaclyn D agreed that the year had been a waste.
Apart from getting famous for the cut and for the paste.
Looking on the internet and copying some shite.
Reposting it with hearts on, it that will make it right.

Claire Hocking – okell is wishing people dead.
Someones hid a million kidnapped children in her shed.
She’s got her people watching at the airport and the boats.
Just wait until she finds them, the dirty little scrotes.


But then the cracks beging to show as the meeting lost its charm.
The warriors are bickering like the cast of Animal Farm.
We know whos done the most, its fairly plain to see.
And all the nations saviours are shouting “me” “me” “me”

A lady in the corner, sitting by the door,
Stood up very slowly and walked across the floor.
The milestones of her life were etched upon her face.
The beginning of her journey in a different time and place.

They saw the faded tattoo of the numbers on her wrist.
She didn’t want it doing but the Germans did insist.
The group all took a closer look but clearly never knew.
The history and the meaning of this tattoo for the Jew.

“I hear you talk a lot about your freedom and your rights.
We talked about them too as we cowered in the night.
They dragged us from our beds and threw us in the street.
But none of us imagined the fate that we would meet”

“Think of our communities taken to be killed.
Think about their futures mostly unfulfilled.
Think about the message that your hate filled lies will spread.
The lies they told of us that time, they filled us all with dread”

“Think about a child standing in a queue.
Whilst a real tyrant decided what to do.
Not allowed to talk just thoughts inside our head.
One way for the workers and one way for the dead”.


“We thought that we would die as each heavy blow descends.
Yet you talk about restrictions as you sit with all your friends.
You talk about your victories and that you don’t consent.
I think about my world and the change it underwent”

“Lets look at what you’ve written for your history of this time.
Imaginary deeds for an imaginary crime.
Lets see the list of actions for which you need our thanks.
Nothing had been written the pages were all blanks”

"Were fighting for our freedom, and fighting for yours too"
The lady smiled and said “I’ve fought more than you’ll ever do”
"Its not just about freedom sit down and listen more"
But the lady seemed to vanish as she walked towards the door.

 

[Thewitcher]

I thought my bet was down.... But wait, Dr Ranj at the last minute throwing a curve ball in...can he draw her out?

 

[Northernoik2020]

El lie looking for a charity to support .. strange I thought she had loads of debts and can’t even get a bank account.. thought she made money from donations and now she’s going to support a charity .. British Gas or Southern Water might want to put their names forward

Wow. And why does she want a ‘small’ charity???? Because she thinks that ‘small’ charities won’t do their due diligence. Since lockdown, the small charities (which make up 82% of the organisations in the U.K.) are struggling like you wouldn’t believe. At the moment, small charities are crying out for support, they received fuck all from Rishi when he announced the grand plan for charities at the beginning of lockdown.

She will know this and she will know that some small unsuspecting charity will snatch her hand off. They won’t be social media savvy and they won’t know who the fuck she is. All they’ll see is someone with a large social media following and think ‘bingo’ they’ve hit the jackpot. And, she wants the charity to be ‘legitimate’. Cheeky fucking bastard. SHE wants to check the legitimacy of a charity?? Christ, my fucking blood has just reached cunting boiling point.

Well, listen up Liey: Hear ye this - The charity you choose, (and my gut is that you’ll go with a small animal charity or one that supports children - Kids and animals, always guaranteed to tug at heart strings) within an hour of your grand announcement, I will personally see to it, that their CEO and Trustees know who you are. This is my promise to you.

Why would I be such a twat? Because I know how hard the small charity sector have had it, and I won’t stand by and watch a little cunt like you, take them for a ride. Now, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

 

[FatFelix]

Ellie Grey. Sunbed, shaved head, all her followers misled.

 

[FatFelix]

Dumb and Dumber

Hamptons sitting in her car, calling people near and far. Listen sheeple, listen folks, this coving 18 is a hoax.

Now she hasn’t got a job, just a whiney mouthy gob. God knows where she’ll get some cash, perhaps from Ellies hidden stash.

She is dumb and she is single, didn’t pull in maskless mingle. One day if she finds her prince, I bet like her he’s thick as mince.

I do not think it would be great, to let her further procreate. I think its fair, we all would say, do not share your DNA.

We know the reason for her fame, she’s at the top of deniers game. In live debates she’d crush id wager, that Labour hero Johhny Major.

When a funny word is said, that rattles round her empty head, she gets her alphabetty book and tries to have a little look.

The dictionary my mum got, starts with Apple and ends in Yacht. But then there is the Z of course? Zebra!! that’s a stripey horse.

Someone tried to be a smarty and said I was illuminati. But I thought that illuminatis, were flashing lights you had at parties?

Someone called me crypto jew and that’s a word I never knew. Please don’t laugh or think it funny, I thought crypto jew was money.

With the details I wont bore ya, of the Faux Pas with menorah. God! Cave my skull in with a stick, I’d only be a tenth as thick.

Never scared to leave her home, or of the Monkhouse , Bob, syndrome. She thinks she is a national hero, we know that she is a zero.

We thought if we denied the virus, the UK people would admire us. But look Louise, look instead, the people have to mourn their dead.

You wouldn’t even wear a mask, and that was such a little ask The end results Louise are chilling, you are complicit in their killing.

 

[Scooobles]

DICK

 

[Thewitcher]

Threat title
Ellie grey number 6, she claims the sunbed is the place to go, it gives you a healthy GLO.

 

[vixfix]

God.....I very rarely go on biba’s insta....and this is probably why.
I’m a midwife in the NHS and I understand that people are entitled to their own opinions re healthcare choices, HOWEVER why does she have to be so vile?! Saying that all medics have a special place in hell?! What the actual fuck is she going on about!!! She’s lost the plot. What a cretin!!
Also her kids are feral.

 

[Northernoik2020]

What’s the betting she’s edited it by the morning?

I’ll tell you what, the very minute she puts up the details of the charity and a donation page, I will be all over it like a fucking cheap suit.

Trust me Liey, the moment your page goes live, the CEO of the charity of choice, will know about you. They really will.

 

[Northernoik2020]

She’s looking for a neon sign. Hope this helps Liey. You can have it on me. No really, think of it as a gift. You give so much, it’s only right that we repay you...