Cleaning with Mario #23 grinch's no 1 fan, who left skids in the pan

[Kaydeelaydee]

Dashing through the hoose
Whilst washing all the flairs
Dezza's oot his face
He no longer cares
Rayn has had enough
Has choked on aw those fumes
She's gonna rip Melv's face right aff
Before the New Year looms

Hey

Jingle bells, Melv excels
At tacky Christmas decs
Dezza lost the will to live
and all interest in sex

I'm thinking of doing a collab and releasing a Christmas album. Anyone know if Mariah's busy right now?

 

[Cagayu]

On this dayn of dawn for a "crapet cleaner" that "does its uses" could I humbly entreat you for a Pied Piper of Hamlin (Paisley) with all his fellow grey clad pointy snouted familiars scampering behind him?

That’s mario’s face from his singing highlight. That bloke films these things just right... I even got the flute in his mouth

Do we think the shark has a wee lie doon noo behind the sofa? Have we ever seen behind there? Or maybe it’s in his Monica cupboard in the hallway


Laughing imagining the Christmas tree lying on the uncomfortable sofa like Derek was a few weeks ago
@Cagayu could you make us a pic so we can visualise this

So festive

 

[Kaydeelaydee]

Sing it if you know it lovelies

Vella Mae's, are you listenin'
Melvins bells they're a-glistenin'
We don't see the point
Dezza's smoking a joint
Livin in a Melvin wonderland

In the mirra you can see his outline
Waving to his lovelies as he goes
He said are you ready, can we go Dez
There's credit on my cards for all these stores

Later on, they'll conspire
As they lay, by the fire
To face quite afraid
the budget they've made
For Melvin's 2020 wonderland

It's gonna be a Greatest Hits Re-Melvined. I'm feeling aw Christmassy. Might need intervention now

 

[Eastendgirl2020]

Hawd the bus ma luvlies, i have identified the location of the pavement!!!! Im not sure if anyone else has guessed correctly but after thorough investigation on google maps street viewer, the pavement in question is Central Road in Paisley. See evidence attached. This leads me to believe he is getting a bus to a Braehead (im sure they stop under that bridge, they used to) or possibly a Glasgow airport job but not sure in the current climate whether an airport job is a realistic suggestion. My bets are on Braehead

 

[Laura VanderBooben]

 

[coldtoast]

Most like thread suggestion by @coldtoast
Mario was all ready for Christmas weeks ago. This week he's carried on buying.
We still don't know what his job is, and he's buying wax burners like a serial killer buying copies of Catcher in the Rye.

I am chuffed tae bits to have been chosen for thread title having only been on tattle for a few weeks i feel pure blessed so I dae my lovelies.

And in honour of said thread title I am a little bit gutted i didn’t think to post this at the time....

Grinch’s No.1 fan, who left skids in the pan?!
It was fucking one of yas!!!!!
Disgusting

 

[Kaydeelaydee]

Cleaning with Mario #24: Where's the Shark, do do do do do do?

 

[Cagayu]

 

[Kaydeelaydee]

Last one.......for today. One verse only.

Wee Queen Melvin
Last looked out
On a cheese-less cheeseboard
Pickled onions all about
IBS through flairboards
Chanted on his gram pal Hinch
Though the witch is cruel
As her army all shelled out
On tat rather than heating fuel.

I know, I know, I've throttled the shit out of this today, but he's an inspiration as youse aw know cos he's told us so

 

[Noseyrosie62]

let me create a vision:


‘Twas the night before Christmas
And all thru the house, not a creature was stiring not even a mouse.
the tatty stockings were hung by the fireplace with so much care.
The toilet seat was sparkling and so were the flairs.
From the corner of dezzas eye , who should appear?
Maz in his primarni PJS and in his eye a glistening tear.

What’s wrong dear Mario it’s Christmas ma lovely?

it’s the Xmas deccies derek, da trolls say they are ugly.

All the pink and crafting
It appears Mario was no longer laughing.

Mario turns to rayn
“My dear gurl they all need to stay in their own lane.
“do the not know who I am?”
“I’m Mario McKnight, hinches super fan.”
I’ll pour a wine from my shitty trolley
And have some funny with dereks Xmas lolly”
Rayn dazed and confused from the toxic wax melts.
Mopes in the corner thinking what a shitty paw in life she had been dealt.
It’s not even 10pm on Xmas eve
But already dezza and rayn are bored shitless and feeling displeased.

 

[Exhausted Pigeon]

 

[NOID-phal]

Most like thread suggestion by @coldtoast
Mario was all ready for Christmas weeks ago. This week he's carried on buying.
We still don't know what his job is, and he's buying wax burners like a serial killer buying copies of Catcher in the Rye.

 

[Cagayu]

C’mon who are we kidding. He wouldn’t be inventive with a book name. It’d be -
cleaning_with_mario - ALL AREAS OF MY LIFE RIGHT NOW

I was trying to get that dusty grey pink shade he likes but CBA so a Lilac tone will suffice! (Pretend it’s that grey pink that he likes!)

 

[Followthey]

Christmas Eve boxes.
ive said it before and I’ll say it again, do grown men, or any adults for that matter actually do fucking Christmas Eve boxes? Is this a thing?
Given that the next day is Christmas I’ve not even ever done it for my bloody children!!
And the effort, who has the time or can be arsed sticking labels to boxes for people to get a pair of pjs, a mug and some hot chocolate stirrers in!! I’m normally 3 G&Ts down by 6pm peeling potatoes on Christmas Eve!

 

[Kaydeelaydee]

OK so now this ratgate has been brought back up how the feck did they even get up there? Like isn't he in the top tier of his bespoke cooonsil hoose that he built from the grooon up? How on earth did rats get in the attic. I can't stop thinking about this situation now

Every time Melvin blasts "Higher Love" the rat population of Paisley toon centre boogie on over to his place, shimmy up the drainpipes and have a wee rat rave, sweating their little furry asses off in your pj's.

Just a theory, mind.

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

Hello ma lovelies. Had a difficult week as my work is closing tomorrow, so I feel "here we go again ", so not really been active, but I hope you guys are good!

Becs ma lovelie, this is just for you all bespoke and plush on this new dayn of dawn. I hope you'll be fine ma lovelie

Morning ma lovelies. So it’s ma birthday today. So I am not staying in ma oon laine, and hoping wee Mazda tells us where he works as ma gift. I will film and share my balloon wave for youse soon. Gifts so far include 365 wax melt burners with Channel and Goochie stickers. Mwah mwah

Happy birthday ma lovelie. I've wrapped up a cereal box and put a Michael Kors sticker on it for a nice plush look for your birthday. Have sent it by Herms for you. Also I made this just for you xx

 

[Libertine1975]

Dashing through the hoose
Whilst washing all the flairs
Dezza's oot his face
He no longer cares
Rayn has had enough
Has choked on aw those fumes
She's gonna rip Melv's face right aff
Before the New Year looms

Hey

Jingle bells, Melv excels
At tacky Christmas decs
Dezza lost the will to live
and all interest in sex

I'm thinking of doing a collab and releasing a Christmas album. Anyone know if Mariah's busy right now?

Oh my god I am crying with laughter.

Deck the halls with tat and wax melts
Tralalalalalalalala
Mario now looking so svelte
Tralalalalalalalala
Don ye now their gay apparel
Tralalalalalalalala
Not that jumper from aunt Carol
Tralalalalalalalala

Light the melts in every corner
Tralalalalalalalala
Who're you calling a hoarder
Tralalalalalalalala
Do you love ma gifted sofa?
Tralalalalalalalala
Use my code for Ava May Aromas
Tralalalalalalalala

Switch on the plug in diffuser
Tralalalalalalalala
Is Derek a weed user?
Tralalalalalalalala
Rayn climbing up the door frames
Tralalalalalalalala
All these fumes can't be to blame
Tralalalalalalalala

Dyson hairdryer, one inch hair
Tralalalalalalalala
Watch me cleaning my flair
Tralalalalalalalala
Get me down to Home Bargains
Tralalalalalalalala
What tat can I buy ma friends
Tralalalalalalalala

Don't forget its ma page
Tralalalalalalalala
With tattle trolls I don't engage
Tralalalalalalalala
I always stay in ma lane
Tralalalalalalalala
Reuse this content all over again
Tralalalalalalalala

 

[shadyessex33]

Aww.... Derek really is a cutie, isn't he?

To be fair I’d have a little bounce on Derek’s bespoke pillar scented candle. Moira must know she is well punching!

 

[Kaydeelaydee]

I'm more than slightly perplexed over the flowers and gifts he's received from the beneficiary of his Christmas cast offs.

The point was surely that they went to someone who really needed them, probably skint, so why would she not buy her own using the money she's just spent on him?

Does not compute!

 

[Shivers]

Highlighted in green the amount of times he referred to himself and then his friend in red. Think it speaks for itself. Narcissistic twat.