Wowwwwwwwww
VIP Member
Beauty blogger? Don’t make me fucking choke on my coco pops
- Notice
Beauty blogger? Don’t make me fucking choke on my coco pops
Alightened
VIP Member
Oh look, he's such a happy chappy now Mummy Deyes has bought him a little balance bike so he doesn't fall off and graze his little knees on his epic bike ride
.
.
Laughingforlife
VIP Member
Wow. He had one job and he tagged the wrong Zoe. Fucking hell
pineapple9
Active member
Came here to say the same. He's "not 100% the best with limiting wastage", is he fucking serious???? How can he be THIS stupid? He produces so much waste, it's disgusting! Yet he sits there and pretends he's trying to be environmentally friendly. My hate grows every day.
thenomad
VIP Member
Preface: First time in a long time that I finished an entire vlog of Alfie's... I'm a bit embarassed to admit this. First take away is that he posted this very late and after the fact. So most of the stuff he vlogged is outdated and irrelevant.
-He starts with Palace to Palace stuff (a week after it's ended...). He still doesn't explain the what the Prince's Trust does. His explanation is "... All the money is going to the Prince's Trust which is the most amazing charity...". Sooo that's his pitch for why you should donate to the charity. It's amazing. End of.
-Remember that padlock necklace we all made fun of Alfie for awhile back? Well it turns out he intentionally bought it as a necklace. Apparently, it came up a bit shorter than he would like, making it more of a choker than necklace-- as if that would have made it any better. Alfie is proof that you can have all the money but it doesn't buy you taste...
- He talks about Future's Elf and emphasizes that it's "not a merchandise". It's a separate brand from Alfie. He said that people are already wearing his not-merchandise for the brand awareness alone (and not because Alfie peddles it nonstop on his IG)
and that "it's sick!"
-He also talks about his kendama and learning new tricks but no one cares...
-Is grabbing a bite to eat and everyone at the restaurant is older than him by "at least 40 years". It says a lot that he is eating at a time when only retirees are out eating. It's because the rest of us have to work and don't get the luxury of working whenever they feel like it and taking 2+ hour lunch/snack/meal breaks. Get some self-awareness, Alfie.
-His laptop is still cracked. He's still bringing it up because he didn't get a gifted one yet if anyone out there is paying attention...
-The difference between how Zoe greets him ("Hi!!!!) when he gets home versus Alfie's begruding "...hello...". Honestly, she needs to leave him.
-Around 11:17 time stamp, Alfie talks about their 7 year anniversary coming up. He talks about how they got Nala two years into their relationship and how weird it is?!?! Zoe then chimes in with (and I kid you not) "Imagine if I got pregnant after two years...". Alfie can barely hid his grimace. All he has to say for their 7 year anniversary is how weird that they BOUGHT Nala two years in but says nothing sentimental of all their years together.
-Alfie ends up in London and checked into his hotel for Good Morning Britain the next day. He scared himself by seeing his own reflection in the dark when entering his hotel room.
-He's still clearly working on his 90 days gym bod by ordering room service for mac n' cheese and chunky chips at 1 am.
I hate myself just a bit for watching it all. The end.
Last but not least: A big shout out to those who actually do the recaps on entire vlogs (@GossWhore, @DoreenYadeley, and many other brave souls). You guys are the true heroes with infinite patience, bc after I finished this vlog there was a bit of self-loathing that came over me for watching something so useless. I don't know how you guys do it.
-He starts with Palace to Palace stuff (a week after it's ended...). He still doesn't explain the what the Prince's Trust does. His explanation is "... All the money is going to the Prince's Trust which is the most amazing charity...". Sooo that's his pitch for why you should donate to the charity. It's amazing. End of.
-Remember that padlock necklace we all made fun of Alfie for awhile back? Well it turns out he intentionally bought it as a necklace. Apparently, it came up a bit shorter than he would like, making it more of a choker than necklace-- as if that would have made it any better. Alfie is proof that you can have all the money but it doesn't buy you taste...
- He talks about Future's Elf and emphasizes that it's "not a merchandise". It's a separate brand from Alfie. He said that people are already wearing his not-merchandise for the brand awareness alone (and not because Alfie peddles it nonstop on his IG)
and that "it's sick!"-He also talks about his kendama and learning new tricks but no one cares...
-Is grabbing a bite to eat and everyone at the restaurant is older than him by "at least 40 years". It says a lot that he is eating at a time when only retirees are out eating. It's because the rest of us have to work and don't get the luxury of working whenever they feel like it and taking 2+ hour lunch/snack/meal breaks. Get some self-awareness, Alfie.
-His laptop is still cracked. He's still bringing it up because he didn't get a gifted one yet if anyone out there is paying attention...
-The difference between how Zoe greets him ("Hi!!!!) when he gets home versus Alfie's begruding "...hello...". Honestly, she needs to leave him.
-Around 11:17 time stamp, Alfie talks about their 7 year anniversary coming up. He talks about how they got Nala two years into their relationship and how weird it is?!?! Zoe then chimes in with (and I kid you not) "Imagine if I got pregnant after two years...". Alfie can barely hid his grimace. All he has to say for their 7 year anniversary is how weird that they BOUGHT Nala two years in but says nothing sentimental of all their years together.
-Alfie ends up in London and checked into his hotel for Good Morning Britain the next day. He scared himself by seeing his own reflection in the dark when entering his hotel room.
-He's still clearly working on his 90 days gym bod by ordering room service for mac n' cheese and chunky chips at 1 am.
I hate myself just a bit for watching it all. The end.
Last but not least: A big shout out to those who actually do the recaps on entire vlogs (@GossWhore, @DoreenYadeley, and many other brave souls). You guys are the true heroes with infinite patience, bc after I finished this vlog there was a bit of self-loathing that came over me for watching something so useless. I don't know how you guys do it.
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Youtubegossip
VIP Member
Whinging about his laptop getting fixed. FOR FREE.... and that he needs it for travelling.
hasn’t it been broken for two months and he’s only just taken it in? Fuck off elf
“I want zoe to dress more street wear”
Why don’t you just go and find a girl that you aren’t a dick to Alfie you moron. And bro your the least street person I’ve ever seen you Tory wanker
hasn’t it been broken for two months and he’s only just taken it in? Fuck off elf
“I want zoe to dress more street wear”
Why don’t you just go and find a girl that you aren’t a dick to Alfie you moron. And bro your the least street person I’ve ever seen you Tory wanker
blurstoftimes
VIP Member
I HATE HIM. How can someone be so stupid, greedy, selfish, wasteful and obsessed with material belongings and then have the audacity to sit on his moral high horse because he has a fucking reusable water bottle? The lack of self-awareness is astounding. I am still convinced that he has some underlying mild learning difficulties. How is he real???
pineapple9
Active member
Tattle just makes me realize that this fucker has no positive qualities whatsoever. He's not funny, good-looking, genuine, honest, well-spoken, smart, polite, respectful, grateful, charming, romantic.... these are all good qualities I cherish in a person. He's nothing of those! How does he still have so many fans left, considering he is an absolute shit person? I mean sure the numbers have fallen drastically, but how can anyone actually like him?
Wowwwwwwwww
VIP Member
Alfie Deyes #8: condom hat kendama twat
Short and simple (as simple as him)
Also, I reckon he will bring a jonny hat out with his merch. Hilarious if he puts the daft word art eye on it.
Short and simple (as simple as him)
Also, I reckon he will bring a jonny hat out with his merch. Hilarious if he puts the daft word art eye on it.
Shellx
Chatty Member
BUT HE'S GOT A REUSABLE WATER BOTTLE GUYS!!
I work in uni admissions. That's...not how it works. The only time we'd admit without grades is if they had years of extensive experience. Being a Youtuber doesn't qualify, unless the university is absolutely appalling. There are actual regulations about admitting people without grades (and if they have grades, regulations about exactly what we're allowed to accept!)Yes, verbatim
The business of being YouTube star Alfie Deyes
We wanted to know how Alfie Deyes runs "Alfie Deyes" the business, the brand, the platform.www.businessinsider.com
Also no university would say 'we're not allowed to say this but' - nobody is forbidden to tell people what offer a uni has made them lol. Such a barefaced fucking lie.
StephenTJackson
VIP Member
Never thought he’d have the chance to visit a China? He has millions in the bank and all the free time in the world, if he wanted to go all he had to do was book it. What he means surely is he never thought he would be #ad #gifted a trip to actually make him want to go, he doesn’t do traveling for culture/adventure, he does freebies.Hooray he's back, I've missed him so much guyzzz. I can't wait to see what he's been up to
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Handwash30
VIP Member
Ah, I love Alfie threads; people really don’t hold back
What a jumped up little twat. I’m surprised he’s still going, when I saw he had a thread here I thought surely not. But nope, there he is, still looking like a young caveman going through puberty. Still behaving like a 15 year old boy on his school summer holidays. Still got that fucking nostril moustache that looks like one of those plastic fancy dress ones you plug in up your nose.
What has always pissed me off is everyone always blamed Zoe for him being a knob head, as if she’s the one holding him back from being incredible. As time has gone on it’s become increasingly obvious that it’s all him, he has had every opportunity in the world to be great but he’s not because he’s just a daft, vacuous cunt.
And his fucking inspirational quotes. “What plans do you have to achieve your goals?” What an empty fucking platitude. Normal people don’t have endless resources and opportunities to live their every dream and carry out every whim like you Alf you prat. I hate these “Write your to-do list and become a millionaire. Simple” type people. Much healthier and more realistic to learn to be happy and appreciate of what you’ve got. I guess Alfie can’t relate to that though.
What a jumped up little twat. I’m surprised he’s still going, when I saw he had a thread here I thought surely not. But nope, there he is, still looking like a young caveman going through puberty. Still behaving like a 15 year old boy on his school summer holidays. Still got that fucking nostril moustache that looks like one of those plastic fancy dress ones you plug in up your nose.
What has always pissed me off is everyone always blamed Zoe for him being a knob head, as if she’s the one holding him back from being incredible. As time has gone on it’s become increasingly obvious that it’s all him, he has had every opportunity in the world to be great but he’s not because he’s just a daft, vacuous cunt.
And his fucking inspirational quotes. “What plans do you have to achieve your goals?” What an empty fucking platitude. Normal people don’t have endless resources and opportunities to live their every dream and carry out every whim like you Alf you prat. I hate these “Write your to-do list and become a millionaire. Simple” type people. Much healthier and more realistic to learn to be happy and appreciate of what you’ve got. I guess Alfie can’t relate to that though.
thenomad
VIP Member
@pineapple9 Thank you for sharing the link. I put it as background noise while getting ready this morning.
One: is it me or does Alfie look more bloated than usual in the face? I know he has always had a massive head but his face looks wider too?
Two: Honestly the hosts all fawning over him was enough to make me
. They even lied and said he had great teeth. Maybe it was the trick of the glaring studio lights? From the video I saw his teeth look extremely fake and like they don’t fit in his mouth properly. And they’re still gummy...Three: Alfie said if he wasn’t a YouTuber he would want to be a dentist because he was good at maths and chemistry. Licherally no one (besides his mum) thinks Alfie is intelligent. I’ve never heard anyone say recently oh that Alfie boy is a smart one. It’s like oil and water. Intelligence and Alfie doesn’t mix.
Alightened
VIP Member
He looks like a puffer fish
thenomad
VIP Member
But his dad went to Oxford, didn’t you know?!?!No matter what he thinks of himself and how he thinks other's view him (obviously he thinks his followers think he's so deep, mature and intelligent)
Foh-lee-ahhhjuh!