Alfie Deyes #7 Joe Sugg's sister's boyfriend/housemate

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Only thing I learnt from that video is Alfie is aging badlyView attachment 58068View attachment 58069
Alfie and Zoe are prime example of you can have all the money in the world and still look like 💩. Crows feet at 26... Sunscreen is your friend, Alfie. Trust! Also, maybe cut back on those pancakes with Zoe. Bloat is coming on a bit strong in the face.

Vlogumentary bit:
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He starts off with a quote in his vlog. Alfie-stotle needs to flex that single brain cell and his ‘directorial’ skills.

Positives:
-Benjamin as their tour guide. He was the calmness to Alfie and his boizzz’s crazy over the top antics and energy. He explained each location and their significance succinctly and didn’t get off topic like Alfie tends to do.
-The scenic drone shots were beautiful, I will give Zach and Steve credit on that.
-As well as the close ups of the glaciers and it’s formations.
-At 17:40 Alfie trying to one up Zach and instead Zach shuts down Alfie with a better comeback.
-At 21:55 where Alfie is gracefully repelling down the ice wall (almost eats it) and at 22:22 the climbing instructor Magnus basically implying what an amateur Alfie is at climbing.

Negatives:
-The slo-mo shots. The first time or so I didn’t mind it but then it started to get gimmicky and was applied to the most random things ever. Like at 20:38 mark where it looks like Alfie’s(?) seductively stroking ice.
-At 24:54, Alfie is playing with chunks of ice. Yes, really.
-Alfie dive-rolling around in the snow and getting it all over his expensive camera. He probably ruined that camera and will get another one to replace his 999th camera for this year.
-When he snuck in that bit for his Future’s Elf merch promo around the 8:32 mark. Sure, 66 North generously gifted their outerwear but Alfie still needs to desperately move Future’s Elf stock.
-Playing his dumb premium cards and Steve playing with a kendama. Who brings a kendama to Iceland?!
- Alfie’s dismal vocabulary. As @Alightened mentioned. It’s not an exaggeration how many times he says “it’s ridiculous”, “sick”, “yooo” and “licherally” all littered throughout the vlog. It’s glaringly obvious because Zach, Steve, and Benjamin don’t do it- they talk like normal people. Not like an idiot.
-Steve and his pedophile mustache. I hated it. That is all.

I was really hoping for an opportunity where Alfie got his tongue stuck on ice or where he floats away on drifting ice (like he talks about in 30:53). Unfortunately, it never happened. Maybe next time he goes like in the summer, he’ll drift away? 🤞🏻

Also, Alfie mentions at one point he wanted to go to Iceland with Zoe or his family and I’m thinking about all the outdoor excursions that Benjamin prepared in advance for the guys and tbh I can’t see Zoe doing any of them. She was too busy icing biscuits or sharing her mashed potatoes recipe across her Zoella platforms. You know important girl boss things or whatever. 🥴
 
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Forget's Sophie's Choice, 2019 is all about Alfie's Choice

"What if instead of saying no, you said yes and jumped into the unknown"

An epic adventure, starring Condom Hat Alfie, Condom Hat Zach, Condom Hat Steve, Condom Hat Ben and some unknown who was filming it that isn't mentioned until the end.

"I was left with two choices, to politely decline the invite, or switch up my plans, grab my camera gear and my friends and get booking our flights"

What does Alfie decide? Will he decide to go on holiday for a few days? Or will he stay at home?
 
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Said it before and I'll say it again. He's a knob.

Literally all I have to say, it was a vlog....that he didn't even edit himself
 
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But it's what you do though Alfie🙄🙄. Copying others because you've not got the intelligence to think up your own ideas😏
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I've said it once and I will say it again. Using drone footage DOESN'T TAKE ANY SKILL. Sure it makes things look cool but a 6 year old could shoot slow mo drone footage and it would look the same.

These people aren't "filmmakers." They're spoiled white rich twats with so much money they can afford to buy nice cameras which, once again, ANYONE can use to get a high quality photo.
 
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With regards to his last YouTube video

he put end credits in hahaha as if the video had any direction or story. He learnt almost nothing about Iceland, he thinks because he has drone shots and pretentious narration he’s a film maker. I also liked (hated) how he talked about a spontaneous trip to Iceland as though it wasn’t planned for weeks you fraud
 
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Ah, I love Alfie threads; people really don’t hold back :LOL:

What a jumped up little twit. I’m surprised he’s still going, when I saw he had a thread here I thought surely not. But nope, there he is, still looking like a young caveman going through puberty. Still behaving like a 15 year old boy on his school summer holidays. Still got that bleeping nostril moustache that looks like one of those plastic fancy dress ones you plug in up your nose.

What has always pissed me off is everyone always blamed Zoe for him being a knob head, as if she’s the one holding him back from being incredible. As time has gone on it’s become increasingly obvious that it’s all him, he has had every opportunity in the world to be great but he’s not because he’s just a daft, vacuous bleep.

And his bleeping inspirational quotes. “What plans do you have to achieve your goals?” What an empty bleeping platitude. Normal people don’t have endless resources and opportunities to live their every dream and carry out every whim like you Alf you prat. I hate these “Write your to-do list and become a millionaire. Simple” type people. Much healthier and more realistic to learn to be happy and appreciate of what you’ve got. I guess Alfie can’t relate to that though.
 
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I will never get over the £1 challenge vid. The most ignorant thing I've probably ever seen on youtube. Classic Tory.
 
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I've said it once and I will say it again. Using drone footage DOESN'T TAKE ANY SKILL. Sure it makes things look cool but a 6 year old could shoot slow mo drone footage and it would look the same.

These people aren't "filmmakers." They're spoiled white rich twats with so much money they can afford to buy nice cameras which, once again, ANYONE can use to get a high quality photo.
I’m so glad someone said this! Woohoo you can fly a camera over stuff, move over Scorsese.
 
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I’m so glad someone said this! Woohoo you can fly a camera over stuff, move over Scorsese.
Exactly. He can afford to go to the most beautiful places in the world, with the best equipment you can buy and also pay his more talented mates to film and edit it for him. Alfie bought nothing to that video whatsoever. Apart from advertising his merch and the free clothes he got. Which by the way did he declare? The amount of sneaky product placements with this lot is ridiculous.
 
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Next up, Copenhagen

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Luckily his ears didn't froze off. Do people really want a Alfie with no ears but a horse mouth.

He's lucky he didn't sit on it... Or no babies :m

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That hat, lol. Perched atop his big red lugholes
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Can’t decide which one he is more like
 
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