Siobh.Ohagan #16 Stay at home with sweaty gee and have a Dominos meal for 3

[brandambassador]

I know this is a page to come on and express your feelings towards people you don’t like. I come and read people’s opinions, and for a bit of goss, I totally get you’re allowed an opinion. So here is my opinion of you absolute twats on this thread…

Why God why, do you follow her if you despise her as much as you say you do? Just unfollow, problem solved, no more SOH.

A lot of you sound like you’re from small villages in Ireland, and you have never left your hometown and your only excitement is coming on a platform to rip people apart for no actual reason. You are most likely jealous, that you got pregnant at 16 and haven’t had the chance to see outside of your shed.

WHY IS THE GIRL NOT ALLOWED TO VISIT HER FAMILY? She has broken no laws. Jesus Christ!

And everyone’s clear obsession with her and James Smith.. Fuck me, imagine he orders a pizza, Deffs a dig at her! If everything everyone in this thread says is a dig at SOH via JS.. then he is the one obsessed with her. But they clearly do not make digs at eachother via their stories. They are not bored little dickheads. This is a made up scenario, by a bunch of bored assholes.

there’s so much more I can comment on but I won’t, cus cba you’re all actual melts. But spending an evening writing a poem about someone you follow on Instagram is very pathetic and borderline obsessive.

Anyways, no hate, love ya xx

How very dare you, my poems are written in the morning not in the evening

 

[brandambassador]

Sorry for my dear diary absence guys!

Dear Diary - London Edition Special.


six weeks on and so much done,
l’ve done BJJ and CrossFit,
low cut dresses from Zara online,
see if James finally notices I have tits

champagne breakfasts, pizza dinner,
different living is just for me,
this week I went to formula one,
I can go where I like you see.

That Niamh yoke who I met in Bali,
seems to have followed me over here.
she’s all for self love and manifesting,
and at that shite I sneer.

she’s not like me, she’s not the same,
the corporate world had me first,
my leaving cert and 500 points,
gave me ambition and a thirst.

Im great at maths, I’m great at science,
(I’m even great in bed),
although since I had my fanny waxed,
Im pretty sure it’s gone dead.

Back to me, let me recall,
the corporate life I had.
9-5 in Dublin city,
made me really sad.

Im not sure that I ever said,
I worked in a night club.
some would say it was ‘just bar work’
but it was more than just a pub!

I was in charge of events and things,
I even met 50 cent,
But life in Dublin was expensive,
for alcohol, pizza and rent!

Now my work is for myself,
I mend relationships with food,
I would never let my own eating,
dictate my feelings or my mood

Ive built an online business,
but spaces to join are rare!
Im so full of shit in Instagram,
you‘d think I really care!

All I want from you, you see
is €79 per month,
Then you’ll realise it’s a total scam,
and you’ll think I’m a ginger cunt.

I must go now, I’ve things to do,
James smith is on tour this week.
ever since I first stalked met him,
I’ve acted like such a creep!

I cannot walk through London now,
as the cat calling makes me mad,
I think I’ll order some dominoes,
and face time mam and dad!

xxxxx

 

[Tippedover21]

Just catching up now. I'm a 32 Yr old GAA player just in from pints lying awake beside the missus. (who has no idea I participate here)

Shivs demographic of dislikers is wider than she thinks. An absolute twat!!! Everything I hate about the false Instagram piled into one.

It is all false and VERY health damaging to those that hang off her every word.

 

[brandambassador]

Not sure what all the hate here is about.

just finished my 3 months on the furnace.

ive Lost an amazing €237 (€79 x 3 for those of ye in pass and foundation maths)

 

[brandambassador]

It’s going to be a long week for me finding words to rhyme with nicca

 

[havinasnoop]

I am CREASED

In the merry month of June from me home I started
Left the huns of Swords nearly broken hearted
Saluted Father dear, kissed me startled mother
Drank a pint of Bulmers, one Domino's after another
Then off to scab off Bali, leave where I was born
Spend all my time trying to banish my one troll off the gram
A brand new pair of birks, 20k a day feet smell like ham
Frightenin' & stalkin James on the rocky road to Dublin
One two three four five
Mam has made her famous rocky road
And all the way to Dublin, Whack fol lol le rah!

 

[Dont_Call_Me_Shirley]

In the beginning there was Brendan the Voyager, who sailed west into the mist and discovered Iceland and quite possibly North America.

Then came the Southerners; Marco Polo went east, Colombus went west and his wake Cortez and Pizarro, who vanquished the Aztecs. Dont forget Cook and Abel Tasman, founders of the great southern lands, chased later by Amundsen and Scott who reached the Pole.

But all these spoofers were all nothing but a pale imitation of Siobhan O'Hagan. Their import insignificant; their efforts worthless.

Siobhan discovered Bali a few years back, a unique, cheap-as-chips beach resort that inspite of long being an AirAsia and Thai Airways destination had never been properly mapped. Siobhan made it cool. She was the first to discover locals could cook passable poached eggs for 20 cents a dozen and definitively ascertained that she had no culinary skills or indeed life ones. She valiantly railed against the scourge that is the Call To Prayer; the Muadins quietened in shame. She also heroically explored several gyms where she could pose for photos after a 5 min workout and discovered bunch of absolute melt instagrammers she was inspired to follow, literally around the world.

It wasnt her last rodeo. On her next brave sojourn she then became the first person in history to ascertain that Sydney is in fact an awful place, inspite of tens of millions of visitors saying otherwise and a profit-making Olympics in 2000 and it having the best and prettiest natural harbour on plant Earth.

But it wasnt all plain sailing, or flying for that matter. Like the Tatars, Napolean and Hitler she was defeated in the snowy fields outside Moscow. After an epic effort (a yellow pack flight from Aeroflot) she found herself adrift at Sheremetyevo airport. To their immense relief the Russians sent her west the next day.

The adventures continued. Vaccine stealing, lockdown dodging, unrequieted lust and the discovery that Portugal is vegetable free, which nobody new. But her greatest victory she saved for last - managing to avoid cooking and the endless ethnic food of London by a record-breaking run of 4 solid weeks of Dominos Pizza.

I cant wait for her next adventure. As for the rest of you small town plebs with husbands/partners, sprogs, proper jobs and your own homes, cop yourselves on. You could have been Siobhan but you chose the easy path

 

[Lilcutiecat86]

The awkward moment when she comments and he ain't joking

 

[Lmarcon]

I need to stop looking at her stories. I’m currently isolating with Covid. Absolutely devastated I got it- I’ve been really conscientious and followed the rules- several cancelled holidays, events etc. Went for dinner and a couple of drinks for a couple of hours for a special occasion and managed to get to get it. Looking at this one, younger than me and fully vaxxed when I’ve only had 1 jab Is infuriating, especially as she has done what she wants for past 16 months. Shame on anyone who supports her through either following or worse again paying for that Furness pyramid scheme

 

[Gossipgurlll5]

What was the point in her coming home? She’s gone to stay in a hotel tonight which is no different to her being in London? She’s not with family and she even had a story up there saying ‘anyone drinking in town today’??? It reeks of desperation like does she not have any friends to make plans with for when she’s home? Kinda says a lot. And she came home and isn’t even staying with her family or doing something with them? She literally ‘surprised’ them, drank them dry and she’s gone again?
and put all of them and her grandmother at risk as well? I honestly don’t get her, she says she’s missed home and her family yet barely sees them for 24 hours and off she’s gone again, to stay in a hotel and drink on her own? I genuinely don’t get the purpose of her visit unless she wasn’t invited to the JS event so booked this to appear as though she ‘couldn’t’ attend anyway?

 

[brandambassador]

Are you walking the recommended 40,000 steps a day?

That’s a bit rude @Markbire . I didn’t have time for any steps today as I made an omlette and between cracking and frying the egg, and washing up - well the day got away from me and I didn’t even leave the kitchen. I don’t need you’re judgement on my lack of steps I shouldn’t have to justify myself

 

[TiredLady]

I need to stop looking at her stories. I’m currently isolating with Covid. Absolutely devastated I got it- I’ve been really conscientious and followed the rules- several cancelled holidays, events etc. Went for dinner and a couple of drinks for a couple of hours for a special occasion and managed to get to get it. Looking at this one, younger than me and fully vaxxed when I’ve only had 1 jab Is infuriating, especially as she has done what she wants for past 16 months. Shame on anyone who supports her through either following or worse again paying for that Furness pyramid scheme

Oh man I feel this so hard! I've been following all the rules, no holidays, seen my parents once since Christmas, and my child caught it at daycare. We're currently isolating in the master bedroom as the rest of the household tested negative. Quarantining in a 12ft by 12ft room with a 1 year old is minus craic in case anyone was wondering. And to see this one swanning around breaking every rule with zero fucks given sickens my hole!! I'm fuming at her thieving vaccines from homeless people and celebrating it - boils my blood. Then hopping on a flight for a weekend. Get to fuck! Sorry for the rant guys. It's been a long few days.

 

[topbop]

Have you seen this post by one of the JS crew, Sven something, he’s based in Ibiza.totally taking the piss out of the likes of Siobhan - or possibly Siobhan herself he also has a video on his page where he pretends to get up at 5am, goes through a load of stuff he has to do for the day, then goes back to bed around 5.30

 

[brandambassador]

Surely before the summer is out, siobhan will drop her nicca-s for James

 

[SellyKayne]

IT WAS FUCKIN ONE OF YESE! Disgustan!

 

[avocadocookies]

its actually so stupid though . if she just put in the work she could be making serious money with the furnace.

1. No she couldn't, I could tell you 20 names on top of my head that are superior to her and charge less with personalised plans etc.
2. Whenever you can go for in person classes and not online unless you're in the middle of the desert without access to anything, the online PT hype is slowly but quickly enough dying out because people realise it's a waste of money. Online will never beat in person training and especially since most don't even do live video or live feedback, it's basically useless. I'm sorry but that's the truth, meeting your coach a couple of times a week will never beat a weekly zoom check in.
3. She cashed in on people's anxiety back a couple years ago but now most people realised that most classes are open regardless of size and shape and in person has grown despite covid. Never seen outdoor classes as full as now not even when indoors was still the number one choice.
4. She has nothing to show for, most people want legit reviews either Facebook or Google etc. She has fuck all but she sadly gets those who still believe they can live her pizza lifestyle and still lose weight. She's not trolling her one troll, she's selling something that doesn't exist because your average person working 9 to 5 can't do 25k steps a day and two fitness classes. She's selling a dream that most can't live. Everything she does is calculated.
5. Her program is outdated and paid for and fucked over with her logos, she bought it and is selling the same for years, she's in no way competitive. Literally a "come on ladies get 'toned' and learn to count calories" cookie cutter program. My Fitness Pal and Reddit (1200/1500 is enough subreddit as we'll as loseit is giving you more for free!). She caters to anyone who wants to eat pizza and do the least possible to achieve the same body she has by being tall (above female average) and walking all day because she doesn't have a real job. If they fail she will refer to mindfulness module or some other shite to make people feel good about their failure.
6. She's one of the biggest frauds out there and dangerous for desperate people who actually wanna lose weight and are infatuated by her shitty lifestyle (part of her sales plan!!!!).

In conclusion, she's a disgusting twat who fakes a lot of her unhealthy life to draw in vulnerable people desperate to lose weight and sells them lies! Despicable!!!!

 

[Cáca_Milis]

New thread title suggestion :
Siobh.Ohagan #17 Acts all posh, won't even wash, god forbid she's running out of dosh

 

[irishgirlo]

Always laugh when she does that video walking past her old office - she must have recorded the same old "omg hated my life, but now? Wow I'm so happy" spiel at least 10 times. Everytime she's in Dublin and around that area, she does it!

You were shite at your job Siobhan, and couldn't hack critique, that's why you left your position, you melted welly

 

[spillthetea123]

“I’m actually jealous of anyone who thinks that’s a good book”

Translation: I wish I was as simple-minded and had standards as low as the people who thought that book was good. Sadly, my standards are too high. I’m too discerning. I’ve too much taste.

Jaysis would you fuck OFF. The way she behaves about books is the way some people behave about wine. She puts my teeth on edge. She’s so pretentious!!!

 

[Kilty0964]

I agree - the woman is a cunt. She's taken the absolute piss throughout the pandemic, a time when most people are pulling together and adhering the to the rules to do what they can to reduce the spread and bring an end to restrictions. She's acted as if she is above all the rules and regulations because she LiVeS DifFeRenTlY (massive eye roll) which to me is a massive FUCK YOU to people who have stuck to them. Lying about essential reasons to travel and acting like covid is just this huge inconvenience. I'm a Brit, and she's come to London when she had no need to ("hot girl summer" isn't classed as essential FYI Siobhan) spreading her potential covid germs around my city and then uses a vaccine that was intended for British residents (after never paid into the NHS which has been hugely negatively affected by Covid) just so she can continue fucking about getting pissed and putting up pointless videos of sped up poorly executed yoga. This pandemic has had a huge effect on me in more ways than one and to watch someone take the fucking piss is deserving of the title cunt in my opinion.

And that doesn't even touch on her shitty diet and lifestyle when she's supposed to be an advocate of health and wellness as a PT, her superior "I'm so clever and well read" attitude and the way she treats her misguided mate Sinead. Fuck the cunt