Mumsnet #7 Tinkly little laugh

[nicalibres]

There’s another show me your engagement/wedding rings thread and one user appears to have fished hers out of a shipwreck

 

[Pebbleybeach]

MN would clutch their pearls at me, I answered the door at after 12am last night. Turned out to be a slightly drunk lady, perfectly polite, who saw the light on and couldn't quite find her road

I’ve bricked up my doors and windows to limit interactions with others. I have a specific email address for people to email me on which I only have signed in on a specific laptop to limit the violence of receiving emails people commit against me and I don’t put my SIM card in my phone so they can’t call me.

The only downside is that now no one can see just how skinny I am.

 

[SpindleWhorl]

Always time for a stealth boast on Mumsnet

 

[Tangent Tiger]

Currently a competitive not sitting down thread on the go i.e to get all your jobs done, don’t sit down from the minute you wake up til you go to bed.

Actual quotes:
‘Yeah I don’t really sit down. I remember in the first lockdown, sitting on the sofa in the middle of the day, and thinking …what is this??’

and

‘I rarely sit down!’

I rarely get up, to be frank

 

[nicalibres]

Been scrolling through the what are you wearing thread and couldn’t not screenshot these

How is she not MORTIFIED to post a pic of that filthy mirror??

Can someone with better eyesight than me confirm that those are in fact dinosaurs on her skirt?

And if this doesn’t just scream fashion, I don’t know what does. . .

 

[FrannyGallops]

Taken from a thread about whether or not the aristocracy still have staff..

View attachment 1693025

I don’t think that counts as ‘staff’ unless the window cleaner works solely for her (like all the others she’s listed) That’s what I assume ‘staff’ means and none of the stuff she’s listed is out of the ordinary (but good on her for trying to sound rich).

I mean I could say I ‘contract out’ my grocery shopping as I have it delivered so someone else picks it for me. Or maybe ‘my personal shopper at Asda’ sounds even better.

Other stuff I ‘contract out’

Hairdresser
Dentist (I’d do it myself but I have the income so why not?)
Postal delivery

 

[Serene Serena]

Could you do a diagram?
They really swallow any sort of rubbish on there. A parking thread has them foaming at the mouth and salivating for details.

Here you go

 

[Samf2020]

Couldn’t even manage one sweet! Classic mumsnet sanctimonious eating.

I absolutely love this thread by the way. So nice to see it’s not just me rolling my eyes (but also unable to look away).

Well I hope she is getting her ducks in a row and getting ready to LTB. She cant be expected to remain married to man who ate sweets.

 

[FrannyGallops]

Skinny jeans are just a leggings replacement unless you’re actually skinny. Clue is in the name. They don’t look great on anyone else.

They’ve been on their way out for the last 10 years…I wish they’d actually go

I agree that skinny jeans are apparently on the way out (whether that will actually happen or not, I’m not sure. I think we’re in a fashion era atm where anything goes and I’m pleased about that) but ‘bootcut jeans and loafers’ puts me in mind of this.

And ‘t-shirt under a summer dress’ is very sister wife chic. That particular look actually came up when I googled Mormon fashion.

 

[bellinibobble]

The guest bedroom thread is hilarious.

If I stayed round my friends house and they left a chocolate in my pillow and disposable slippers for me to wear, with a mini fridge and hot drink facilities I’d no joke think they’d had a mental breakdown.

 

[ChickenLicking]

I am reading the thread about Husky puppies now.

I only drink rainwater out of puddles and that's a treat.

 

[raspberryjuice]

They dress like the mannequins in the charity shop window.

 

[ChickenLicking]

Here's a horrendous example from the 'what I am wearing today Autumn/Winter 22' thread. The poor woman is wearing a skirt made from the same patterned fabric as the other prolific poster with the dodgy B&B carpet.

 

[Shimmering]

I've got covid and I'm exhausted so was just having a read of this thread and now I have something to get off my chest that I've never been able to before.

It was 2013. I had two toddlers, had just moved back to my home country after years away, was going through a very difficult time emotionally.

I took my kids to the library for the first time, and when leaving the kids section, there was a man looking at porn on the computer with the screen facing the entrance to the kids library. I told the librarian and left the library. Was quite disturbed by what I had seen so after thinking about it at home, later on I called up and spoke to a librarian to see what had happened. This librarian was absolutely horrible to me and told me he wouldn't tell me. Fair enough. I left my number and asked for a call back.

I posted on AIBU to check if I was unreasonable to look for an update on how they dealt with it. What I got was pages of people insulting me, telling me I was nosey, I was a prude, I was trying to stop this man enjoying porn, it was nothing to do with me etc, etc. I posted once more to say that by the reaction I was obviously being unreasonable and left the thread. That didn't stop them going on though!

Back in reality, I was then called by a library manager who was more than happy to help me out and reassure me that they'd dealt with it. That was all I wanted. I still didn't return to the library for nine years though.

Thanks for letting me get that out! Feels good.

 

[Pebbleybeach]

I keep bringing up how irritating it is when they act thick on MN to show their class/how above everyone else they are etc but this one is too far so I’m bringing it up again

There’s a thread in chat very clearly titled to show it’s about Fearne McCann. Many posts asking ‘who?’ Or saying ‘never heard of her’ - why open the thread if you’ve never heard of her, and if for some reason you do, why not Google her if you want to know who she is!

Even worse there’s 3/4 posts on there saying stuff like ‘I always did hate Fearne cotton and now I know why’ ‘I read this whole thing thinking it was about Fearne cotton’ - why?! It clearly says Fearne McCann in the bloody title! Do they regularly turn up at the wrong events because people have similar names are Mickey Flanagan shows full of bewildered parents with their children thinking they were going to see Mickey Mouse? Are jimmy carrs shows full of people annoyed than Alan hasn’t turned up?

 

[Popcornshovel]

What is it with the competitive eating, what do they get out of this? I notice it with many influencers as well, either boasting about the massive salads or the minimal amount of a fucking gummy bear they manage to heat before being absolutely filled to the brim.
I don't know anybody in real life who would go on and on about that? Sure, I myself don't like jelly sweets myself that much, but give me crisps or a croissant or chocolate and you better bet I eat it. And they even do the same about the eating habits of their strapping sons and birdlike daughters. Are they projecting some sort of eating disorder on them? That would actually be pretty nasty for the kids.

The only person I knew in real life who was like that, was a former manager who was batshit crazy. She was classic mumsnet - her job was in the £60-70k ballpark, she lived in a posh village and had 2 strapping sons in the Navy. She once brought in truffles from her holiday, and offered them round the office saying 'just take one each please'. Then went back to her desk and said 'I'm going to lock the box of truffles in my drawer so you greedy piggies don't eat them all today, you can have another one each tomorrow'.

When we ate a chocolate orange in the office at Xmas (between 6 of us) she exclaimed 'have you managed to eat it ALL in one day?'.

 

[melonpane]

just caught this, dying here lol, it's one of us!

 

[BlairWaldorf86]

Exactly.

And sometimes it's so ridiculous 'my dd had her bff over and they had a row and the bff's ddad was annoyed and he brought along his ddog and the ddog bit my dd.'

I need to lie down in my dbed after writing that.

With apologies to @ChastityDingle may I propose a thread title:
My DD’s BFF’s DDad’s DDog bit my DD’s leg, AIBU to lie down in my Dbed?

 

[Pebbleybeach]

Oh God! I can’t stop laughing. There’s a thread titled ‘What did you get for your daughter’s 18th birthday.’ Our very upper class friend (she wishes) apparently gave each of hers, among other things, a family tiara!

That’s normal! I got a tiara for my 18th birthday! It was like this one

 

[Serene Serena]

I’m wearing this and so is my husband.