Hannah Gale #9 It me. It you. It paying my bills and putting me through med school.

[sallybreadsticks]

Hannah's been on a hot date to gunwharf quays, the shopping centre in portsmouth. Five Guys, followed by a quick fingering in a piss-drenched fire escape behind Claire's Accessories.

wat a gal

 

[Orangesocks182]

“It me”

 

[sallybreadsticks]

Got a bit of info re: Hannah's illness btw. It's via a mutual friend, and no, I cant give names as some on here have demanded

It's a wild plot twist...

The mutual says Hannah is pregnant again... courtesy of the Portsmouth Shagger, aka the Pompey Penis

I'm aghast.

 

[PastorBake]

If my own 'fave snippets' of December included going to Sainsbury's self checkout and posing in front of a limp Travelodge shower curtain, I'm not sure I'd be sharing them on Instagram.

 

[TheLastLolo]

Imagine looking this much like a serial killer.
I feel like this is the last thing you’d see before she chloroformed you and you woke up chained to bath.

 

[Bebevomit]

You can see the ‘H’ and the ‘J’ under the drawn heart

The hearts drawn around their initials too. I’d rather implode like a dying star than draw a heart around my crushes name like a child. She must be trolling us.

 

[emm]

I'm kind of surprised she hasn't added "girlfriend" into the bio tbh

 

[UsernameLeah]

“having her guts rearranged”

i love it here.

 

[coolcapitalist]

Especially as she's dressed like Mr Tumble.

Omfg RIP

 

[Rosie_Goldie]

I've voted that The Leopard will return but I'd like to add a caveat- it will return briefly for black friday/Xmas shopping/Jan sales with gift guides. The aff links will be to good an opportunity for them to miss. But it'll be Hannahs gift guide which she'll then share to the leopard to 'be helpful' and ensure she cuts Gemma out of the earnings.

 

[lolabar123]

Predictions for her next text post -

“The Joys of finding Love after kids”
Sainsbury’s trips. Nights away at Travelodges. Shorts in November. Making your ex jealous

etc etc

 

[ChilliBean]

Someone dig me a grave because I have died of secondhand cringe

 

[ophelia1990]

Has she really just soft launched the new boyfriend with a photo of his legs? YOURE NOT FIFTEEN.

I agree. Don’t care if Chris ended it first or whatever, the absolute desperation of her trying to shoehorn the fact she’s going on dates and “loving life” to try make him jealous is tacky af. You have 2 kids, stop airing your dirty laundry and doing this weird pantomime to prove how much fun you’re having and get on with coparenting.

 

[centreaisle]

It’s like when you’re a teenage and start having sex for the first time. COOL WE KNOW. YOURE HAVING SEX WELL DONE.

What makes it all the more jarring is that she never alluded to any intimacy (or as she’d put it ) with Chris. we only know they had sex because she’s got 2 kids, there was no mention of date night antics or whatever. The fact she’s now dropping endless hints that she’s having her guts rearranged seems very offbrand for her so it comes across more as “LOOK AT MEEEEEEEE CHRIS” rather than “I’m just enjoying myself, unbothered.”

Not that you ‘win’ a break up, but think chris won this one lol

 

[Pinkii]

Sorry i’m really embarrassed for her, she has been dying to post him on the grid afyer dropping so many hints.

It definitely feels like she is in competition with the ex and trying to win ‘who’s happier first’

The whole in a hotel relationship seems really seedy

 

[Starttheline]

Gemma, is that you?

 

[panda-eyes]

End of year burnout? Get to fucking fuck, Hannah.

 

[Roobalooba89]

trying to write a song parody help me!

Hold me closer, tiny boyfriend
Count the headlights on the highway
It me down in sheets of Travelodge
You had a ‘busy’ day today

great catch re the hand over the children’s faces!

 

[brightonbarbie]

trying to write a song parody help me!

Hold me closer, tiny boyfriend
Count the headlights on the highway
It me down in sheets of Travelodge
You had a ‘busy’ day today

great catch re the hand over the children’s faces!

Blue Jean baby,
Sussex lady,
somehow promoting brands.
Goggly-eyed,
Lopsided smile,
She wants to marry a Portsmouth man

Aspiring medic,
You must have read it,
Cringe captions about college antics.
Where are the kids though?
Probably with Chris, so
Back to the Travelodge Hannah must go

 

[Bleurghgram]

I googled her and ended up on her dead GG thread.

Sallybreadsticks did you formerly go as sussexsexy?