The Chateau Diaries #279 When you grift upon a star

[Imperious Me]

What's more dangerous- sewing in the not-so-grand salon or repelling with Nick?

Oohh.. choices, choices..
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Big Boy Andrew and Tante Two Tonnes ought to do a remake of that series. They certainly got the... "joie de vivre" for it.
All those decadent dishes; a 15 course Christmas menu with a stunning trou normand at the end.
It'll beat Dana's Cookbook right out of the waters, LOL.

What happened with the two puffs? I noticed they've removed any flogs with Fanny or Lalande in them... Bet Snorts/she told them to stop coming round so much and using 'their' place for content...

 

[ComtesseRose]

Just watched the start of the latest from the Shitshow. As usual, if Stef's lips are moving, she's lying. She had a meeting with the architect and building manager then the local school children came to Lala land to sing Christmas carols to her. But - sad news - none of this was documented.

Followed by Santa's elves bringing her sacks of presents from the three wise companies; Fortnum & Mason, Bernardaud, and Yves Delorme.
As she was pulling herself together she saw the biggest brightest star over her little chapel, she of course had to investigate this, so as she approached the chapel she saw little grey men asking for their missing leader and they were holding a painting of Phillys, she couldn't believe it, but she did, when all 6 little grey men started doing the Charleston.
She bid Phyllis and the little grey men farewell as they left and went inside and cried of joy stroking her new Yves Delorme bedding, for the little grey men had, unbeknownst to Phyllis, promised to take Mummykins with them.

 

[JackSpratt]

I liked Marie's mother's table setting. While it was simple, it had a theme and was beautifully executed. Not overloaded, appropriate for the occasion. The numerous positive comments on the vlog are truly a kick in phiphi's non-existent balls. I like it. Yes I do

I thought the name cards were great. A few days ago I thought to myself that if guests were to pay 75 euros for a sparse meal, they could at least make name cards and a printed menu like at John's dinner. It doesn't take much effort and guests have a little reminder if they go to bed hungry. But you can see that Phiphi is a no-brainer - he completely lacks attention to detail.

That waste of space could learn a lot from Marie's Mum on table laying, less is more. Didn't it look simple, elegant and crisp and less washing up for the poor old scullery maid that is Dave. As I believe those arsewipes leave it all for somone else to do, been there and got the T Shirt from my Chateau working stint.

I can just imagine him sitting there with that 'invitation to slap him hard look on his face', as in his eyes that would have been a piss poor effort.

Even Marie's Mum was getting impatient for them to all sit down to eat before it went cold. They must live off tepid or cold food there

 

[ComtesseRose]

Ugh. Why do people think my channel is a renovation channel?
I mean just because I'm asking for help with funding the renovations doesn't mean it's a renovation channel.
Hopefully, Nic Larkin will sort it all out for me. I can't believe he came without a present.
*waddles into another room*
I wonder if he's proud of me for pulling off that Adopt a Star Ponzi scheme... I mean, now I can have the best of the best - a Hermès bag.

 

[ComtesseRose]

Congratulations @Midnightcowboy for nominating the thread.
@TorontoGWM I agree with you, lets keep the star thread title nominations going. Maybe we'll be lucky, that we show up on Google and decent people will reconsider purchasing one...

Most Liked Posts from the previous thread:




Jules100
VIP Member
Monday at 10:08 PM

• #106

Here’s a quick update on my chapel star adoption opportunities… It’s been going very well! So well in fact, do to the unbelievable demand, I’ve just added some more stars. Remember, they’re just $5,000 (US) each. Unfortunately there is no discount for the smaller or not quite as perfectly formed stars. No pressure but, I’ve been doing a lot of online shopping and have several shopping carts just waiting for me to return and finish my checkouts.

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Pyke
VIP Member
Monday at 6:51 PM

• #85

Do not usually share personal stuff but I am SO Happy that my surgeon gave all clear on my skin cancer BCC removal from arm this afternoon, BEST Christmas present ever, 3 inch scar will serve as my reminder to cover up / sun screen / shade myself, look after yourselves Tattlers.

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Teefs
New member
Monday at 10:17 PM

• #108

Hi all, long time lurker here. Found you a few years ago after becoming suspicious of Miss Jarvis and the goings on at the farmhouse.
Was also here for all of Clara’s revelations and subsequent departure…..never really knew what to make of her and her musings. Anyway, just wanted to raise my head and finally introduce myself and stop lurking in the shadows.
Don’t worry, I’m not a flying monkey, just someone who is sickened by the scrounging, lying miss Jarvis and her gay Lego haired revolting twank of an apprentice.

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Jules100
VIP Member
Tuesday at 2:53 AM

• #168

M&MsMom said:
When do you require payment? I don't have the money myself, but I started a GoFundMe site AND a BuyMeADietMountainDew site. I anticipate having the money for you sometime in 2024, or maybe even 2025, I just don't know the exact date. Do you have layaway maybe?
If this is a problem, of course, I will understand.

Sure no problem, but no later than early 2026. I don’t have a layaway program in place yet, but I do consider our TL conversations to be legally binding. Do you want a big star or a little one?

…

Whilst I was online shopping for a Hannibal tv show funko pop, I found out one can make custom funkos on the funko website for only $30. I made a couple for a few of my kids that would be interested and since I’ve done so well with my chapel star adoptions the past few weeks, I went ahead and made these… I did my best with the limited options they had.

Philip:
I gave him two crystal goblets to hold, skinny jeans, red sneakers and a lady body because the men’s body was too chunky for his tall & slender frame. Philip is also accompanied by Lancelot.

Stephanie:
I gave her some cash and a bottle of wine to hold, I tried to give her a tacky middle aged outfit (unfortunately there was no yellow dress), an Annalise hairdo and Ruby is sneaking up behind her about pee on her cankles.

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Midnightcowboy
Well-known member
Tuesday at 1:23 PM

• #290

News update!

Forget about Fanny's stars, buy mine instead... lots of choices available.

Price on application...

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Reactions:StephaniesSupportConsort, Sunnee, T Rex and 42 others


Well I for one can't wait for the Patreon vlog tonight.
As always @tuffiti, you're a G.O.A.T. for the Patreon vlogs

Please remember newbies and lurkers, we've got a wiki (and welcome)
As always Happy Tattling.

 

[Pyke]

I hope all Tattlers with a Christmas Tree have given special attention to their Star this year, and give Thanks that it is not in a Chapel in the middle of France but in the heart of their own home for our family generations, real friends and visitors to see.

 

[On Repeat]

Ba

What a lazy cunt.... Does F4F consider her too good for the common cooking. So once the Weed Whacker left, Dana International is brought in.... Too busy being Bernie Madoff of Chateauverse.

Bag head seems so tiny without the bag... And his wife being so hmmm robust?!

Poor Tati Tonton... Had a handsome confident and I guess somewhat professional son who leaves to France to help out his spinster cousin. And now has a graying, depressed mess, a shadow of a man whose main duties is to be an untrained waiter, sweep floors and carry shit around. To have a cunt of a girl friend whose only redeeming feature is that she is a slightly warmer alternative to kilo of minced meat to pleasure yourself in.

The future sugardaddy of Phiphi, John must be so happy his business and fondness of "porcelain" is all over the internet.... I cannot wait how much more footage we get from him.

I cannot imagine that you have to plan a Christmas that we are staying in one room since all other rooms are deemed unsafe. So the Xmas is not at all staged and unorganic.... .

I am all for presenting and promoting a lifestyle, but to do it so badly. Look at the Fleuries... They present a cute dynamic and in a achievable lifestyle... After all we all could lino press shit, but doubt many can relate buying Givenchy furniture or killing workers on your property.

Baghead fits the effeminate vibe Stephanie Jarvis likes in her men. Baghead's wife Marie is gorgeous in my view. She looks healthy, she looks natural, she has an important job, she is a mother and I think out of all the female wannabes who parade through that shitshow she is the most genuine. Why she is with that tosser Baghead, I can't fathom.

 

[Gertrude Maud]

That’s it…. I give up! As long as the world is full of IDIOTS, fraudsters like Stephanie Jarvis thrive
Also, bitch! Stop spamming my email!!

View attachment 2634798

It's not illegal but immoral.
But then again SJ has few morals, if any.

One of the people who adopted a star commented that she was so happy to adopt a star but would probably never be a able to afford a trip to France to visit the chateau to see her star. So she doesn't have the money to visit but will scrape together enough to buy a star for a woman who is already rich.
What is wrong with people? She and others are gullible and misguided, thus making them susceptible to the predatory behaviour
of con artist Stephanie Jarvis and her lieutenant Philip Janssen. I also believe that many of these people lack higher order thinking skills, making them perfect targets for scammers. They believe the opportunistic predator Stephanie, and want to be part of the chateau verse bubble; they are ripe for exploitation. Fanny Fucker is screwing them over and is simultaneously fucking their minds and emptying their wallets.
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Hey chatelaine, how about matching the $100K and donating the same amount to cancer research?

View attachment 2634890

That bitch is a con artist not a philanthropist. She's a taker not a giver.
And I see she's wearing that fluffy blue collared thing again.

 

[Bogue de Juin]

Anyone want to query where her cookery class is as it's probably best to locate herself not too far away from it. Will it be like the flower arranging class, really only an intro. Why not attend a cookery school in France and feed SJ's guests (guessing this is reason) with some French food with locally available produce. Will they expect her to follow recipes?

Just guessing of course but possibly at Leath's School of Food and Wine in London. I know she's a fan of Motor Yacht Loon and follows their Youtuber chef @TheCrewChef (as do I). The Loon Yacht chef vlogged her experience at Leath's where she attended classes in order to complete her Ship's Cook Assessment. It's funny, when I was watching that vlog, I thought this is probably something Marie wants to do. .

I checked Leath's course calendar and they have a course starting on Janurary 8, 2024 and the course sounds like it would fit what Marie might need. It's geared to people with some experience in cookery but who want to hone and "up their cooking game." It's called Chef's Skill Course and runs from Jan. 8 to Feb. 27 at about £5000 (https://leiths.com/course-calendar/?d=2024-01).

I guess we'll see because I'm sure Marie will be posting on her Insta in the future. Love a little detective work on a dreary, cold Sunday.

 

[LittleMore Cottage]

Well I just got deleted from the latest vlog. Just because I asked who takes care of Ratso , Ruby and the other animals if Marie is away ??? Honest question. Fanny herself called him Ratso.

 

[KyBourbon]

casaduemilia
27 minutes ago (edited)
Philip thank you for driving very early in the cold morning long distances just to upload this video.

Over $30K per month through Patreon, thousands per month on YouTube and sponsorships, over $100,000 collected practically overnight through the star grifting program. To put it bluntly…Philip driving his ass very early in the morning long distances just to upload a video isn’t a favor….it’s truly the least he could do.

 

[CocktailGirl]

Someone's been scrubbing their Instagram pages! I've looked at both Stephanie's personal page and the Lalande page and there are several pictures missing. I went to look for the picture of Nic, the one where he is pictured in a cafe (in London, I think) and the caption was something about how he had good ideas or was the business brains behind Lalande.....he was in a blue sweater, no bag over his head. That picture has been wiped from the pages. The other one that is gone was that group picture where they are all dressed in Indian (the country) costume.

Reputation laundering?

Yes, there has been a lot of 'scrubbing' going on, not just now but gradually over the last few years when something unsavoury has come to light, or when someone has wanted to distance themselves from the chateau shenanigans. I wonder if this current wave has been prompted by Nic wanting to pull away from his attachment to Fanny's sinking ship and all who sail in her.

No problem though, there are always those of us who have been around from the beginning of this farce who have saved the odd photo or two.

Here is one of my personal favourites, just say the word if you want any more as I think others here have a much more extensive library than me:

 

[graciemckitten]

SOUNDS LIKE THE PISSY PORCELAIN FONDLER IS ON DUTY AS CAROLINE GOODER AT THE MOMENT.

yvonnestobie-qt2ng

9 hours ago
Love Amaurys reaction to the table settings, just give the man a plate and a bottle of beer and stop all the fluffy nonsense, Really would love to see him visit Dan


@carolinegooder7091
49 minutes ago
They are setting a beautiful table and great food before his mother, and he still conplains because he doesn't like porcelain unless it is really useful. Wood and baked mud pottery gave way to porcelain and silver as they were invented to stop the spread of disease

 

[Lochness Monster]

I have a mix of Miniature Pinscher and Chihuahua, and I wish I was as dainty and tiny… instead I just bite people’s head of for daring to approach me

We are both hopeful, need regular walks and grooming, have bright eyes and if I am not careful a hairy lip.

 

[MarquisOfNadaillac]

Did we really just get a whole video without a sight (or snort) of Philip?!

It's a Christmas miracle!

 

[Lady Pinkadella]

I liked Marie's mother's table setting. While it was simple, it had a theme and was beautifully executed. Not overloaded, appropriate for the occasion. The numerous positive comments on the vlog are truly a kick in phiphi's non-existent balls. I like it. Yes I do

I thought the name cards were great. A few days ago I thought to myself that if guests were to pay 75 euros for a sparse meal, they could at least make name cards and a printed menu like at John's dinner. It doesn't take much effort and guests have a little reminder if they go to bed hungry. But you can see that Phiphi is a no-brainer - he completely lacks attention to detail.

 

[Pyke]

WHY was that Twat not outside up a ladder removing the faulty fairy lights, it only involved cutting cable ties. WILL someone at that dump tell him to get off his lazy arse and work. PATHETIC the lot of them.

 

[TorontoGWM]

Adopt A Star and be part of something big - a big fraud!

 

[MRShavershamsdress]

Uting grow salt and reell and hard scrubbing a couple of times will clin that Kindle of table
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an old woodbord you have to scrub it ate lgrow salt.ist 2 time with grow salt to remove the bacria and smuff the you can protect it witk voksduk. I do the same with bread cupboard. Learn it from old p

My grandmother washed her work surfaces daily. Weekly she used coarse salt with a little olive oil and a scrubbing stone before wiping everything down. She used a similar method to clean cast iron. The old ways are often the best.

 

[M&MsMom]

I've wondered if it's under investigation still... isn't that where Amaury dug up for the lighting? Could the machine have been too heavy and crushed the conduit he put underground, any jolt from below would have catapulted anyone in the basket... if he wasn't wearing a safety harness he'd have been thrown out. Amaury has been exceptionally distraught..

Very interesting!
By the way, I've missed you! Hope all is well with you and your family!
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Amuary is well over Fanny & her shenanigans, but he especially hates Snorty.

At lunch Amuary stood in the corner and couldn't even be bothered to look up and acknowledge Fanny & Snorty's birthday gift of 6 porcelain dinner plates to his mother.

But it was the scene after dinner in the kitchen that I had a wee pee when Amuary said to Snorty, "Jesus man, you can get a plate from Marks & Sparks that does the same job as your porcelain does".

And who can blame Amuary, because who doesn't want to slap Snorty's cocky smile & smarmy face into the middle of next year.

Oh my God...that last pic of Philip! I cropped your picture....he just looks like such an asshole here, with his little drawn in hairline.....I don't know why he doesn't just cut his hair. It must take him more time to do his hair up than Stephanie!

If I were Amaury, I would be ticked off about the way Stephanie, and especially Philip, fawn all over Chantal. It's his mother, after all. I realize the vlogs are made by Stephanie, so it's from her POV, but when Amaury's parents are there and Amaury is around, it's as though his parents don't realize he exists. In most of the videos, you'd never realize (if you were new to the channel) that those are Amaury's parents.