MOD & FOD #4 The kids are on show to fund the reno!

[Madbadsad]

Hello also long time lurker and this thread gives me life. Although I do feel guilt about the bitchier aspects it feels really good to know I'm not the only one to feel this way. So thankyou.
I'm choosing to comment now because of kirkvanhouten's comments about wanting to be a midwife. Sorry this is a long one - bear with me...
I'm a midwife and that is how I came to know of Clemmie. I've been following her life with fascination for seven years now! Since my eldest was a baby and I was on maternity leave. I was desperate for a mum role model and in Clemmie I thought I'd found it. This was pre insta
She had an amazing job as a community midwife, she had two beautiful children and she was gorgeous, cool, had lovely things, a lovely husband. She wrote this great blog called Gas and Air. She seemed really passionate about midwifery. Even back then before instafame she seemed to have i all. And loads of holidays even then! I had a girl crush and I was jealous I guess. A lot of us were jealous if we were to admit it.
But as time went on I became more and more disillusioned with her.
A couple of times I messaged her to ask if she'd use her platform to talk about really important things that were happening in midwifery. Minimal publicity had been given to these issues and here she had this great platform to spread the word. She was polite enough and replied but chose not to say anything at all. Just talked about her clothes or something completely superficial instead.
I bought her book and it was such tripe. Really badly written. Not evidence based. Terrible 'advice' about breastfeeding. Just promoting her insta mates. And telling women to buy a leather jacket to help them adjust to motherhood. Please!
The thing that really did it for me was a post about maternal mental health. As a midwife she will know about puerperal psychosis, crippling PND where women commit suicide and/or kill their babies and women suffering PTSD and trauma. But Clemmie spoke about a basket she had been gifted to collect the crap on the stairs #maternal mental health. And as for that superdrug collab...
Being a midwife does not make you a saint. It's a job. A profession. You get paid for it. Her making out that it is somehow saintly is crap and actually insulting to midwives.
There are tons of people who are really passionate and have amazing stuff to say about birth and motherhood so please don't let Clemmie be the only voice of midwifery.
There are also tons of midwives who work their asses off - night shifts, weekends, missing christmas, kids birthdays and don't get this praise.
When she left insta I had admiration for her. Finally I thought - she will appreciate her life. Gorgeous healthy kids, 'great relationship' with her husband, supportive family, house, job she loves. But she couldn't stay away.
And now I see that she is caught in a trap. They are used to the money, a life style to maintain. Private schools for the kids. A brand. But more than anything the adulation, the praise, the fame. That is truly addictive. A day to day life of long NHS shifts, not getting paid much. Looking after 4 kids. No glamourous parties and presents and money rolling in. No endless praise from literally hundreds of thousands of people. How can she go back to that?
She is a very pretty girl with good taste who was in the right place at the right time. She made friends with women who had connections - other instamums. She has had money and gifts literally thrown at her. And instagram is new - it is an experiment.
Everything has a price. And sadly I think the Hoopers have sold their souls to the devil. For the price of their holidays, house, dishwashers, trainers. They have exchanged their children's privacy, their mental health, possibly their marriage. And sicko that I am I take a morbid fascination in watching it all like a car crash.
I'll probably get shot down in flames for saying this but I do feel sorry for Clemmie because I think that she is probably a lovely person and a great midwife. The fact the no one has come out of the woodwork to complain about her care or a poor outcome is a bloody miracle in someone who has been a midwife that long.

 

[CyanideKiss]

What disturbs me is how Clemmie blatantly and callously uses her professional role as a midwife to prey on women when they are often so vulnerable. Because, hey, all midwives must be lovely, and genuine, and caring, and selfless, right? Right? (actually not necessarily, my midwife was so rude that she got a verbal caution from my consultant). Also, many new Mums become very emotionally attached to their midwifes for lots of reasons at a time when they are needy and vulnerable and very open to suggestion because they want to be the best Mum they can be, and want the best things for their baby.

And, in sidles St Clemmie with her shiny midwife badge and astonishingly large, toothy smile, insta-whispering in the ears of her vulnerable followers to buy this, wear that, admin your fanny, rock a £500 biker jacket, book a babymoon, buy this and this and this because THEN you will be just like me and I MUST be doing it right because I am a midwife.

It's morally wrong.

To add - it's a crying shame she can't do some supportive posts about how you can still be a phenomenal new Mum just wearing supermarket jeans and your partner's fleece. And that babies can be perfectly content in an IKEA cot. Or that normal midwives actually couldn't care less if you have fanny admin'd or not.

But, I guess she doesn't want freebies from George @ Asda or Ikea.?

 

[Pommes]

I’ll abstain from the comments about children’s appearances. However I do think this conversation probably illustrates perfectly why it is so wrong for parents to put hundreds of photos of their children online to thousands of followers. I couldn’t begin to imagine how I would feel if strangers online were discussing the attractiveness (or unattractiveness) of my offspring, knowing I had created the opportunity for them to do so myself.

 

[pombear]

Going to come across as very classist, but they way they carry on is just common. Tag this, swipe here, AF AD GIFTED... it's just crass. £280k in the bank is NOTHING to the sort of people they emulate, if that makes sense. i.e. if you could afford to live like they do in terms of consumerism, you'd need a lot more than £280k in the bank. But then people who could afford to live 'like that' probably wouldn't. The amount of seriously wealthy people I know driving around in clapped out shitty old cars buying their clothes from supermarkets because the kids wipe snot all over them anyway is testament to that. They don't waste money on things, they invest it.

And they don't then flaunt all their shit on the internet...

I think a case in point is someone like UGG, who before she had the instafame and therefore crazily expensive kids' shit sent to her for free was using IKEA £19 high chairs for the twins. I bet the new baby will be Stokke'd up to its eyeballs. She's in it for the freebies, but it does then move her into the crass bracket.

Properly rich people don't bother wasting all their money on fads. It's the lower aspirational socioeconomic classes who priorities 'stuff', and that's who the MOFODS are revered by. And actually it's very apparent when you see MOD especially basically only commenting on wealthy instafamous accounts that she's exactly the same.

Social climbing is SO VULGAR. Bad enough to do it IRL, but in public on social media.. desperate.

 

[CyanideKiss]

I agree- I'm sure it's not all as it appears. BUT considering they are represented by PR people I'm surprised they are deliberately making it appear so unequal. If the 'gram is to be believed it certainly appears that she is frequently off enjoying herself and he is the bearer of the domestic load (imagine the uproar if it appeared the other way!). I wonder if it's more to do with her decision to feature the kids less and have more variety on her account. His account is JUST Ottilie and Delilah/FOD appearing bewildered by life/FOD preaching about periods... he does not seem to have much else going on.

Their PR management team know the ODs target audience - not very bright, lower middle class, 20&30 somethings, who aspire to a 'posher' lifestyle and who believe that wearing Clemmie's tat jewellery or having a pink velvet chair will magically propel them up the social ladder. The type of women who used to dot their i's with a little heart at school and who think Radley handbags are aspirational. These women also like their men to be totally emasculated, totally domesticated and have never had a decent fuck in their lives.

Ergo, Clemmie & Simon are their icons. Both totally sexless, posh voiced, cutesy mannerisms, vapid and obsessed with acquiring stuff, stuff and more stuff.

 

[Loulabelle85]

Hey what's with the Planet Thanet bashing, it's not so bad here spare a thought for us putting up with all the twatty instagrammers claiming it as their own, so called 'gentrifying' the place and then pricing those of us wanting to buy houses, where we've grown up and where our families live right out of the market! Or worse, buying 'cute' little 'staycation' houses I preferred it here when it was a certified shithole and no one would touch it with a bargepole. Now it's full of Tarquins and Tabithas who act like they've discovered Shoreditch on Sea

 

[Madbadsad]

She used to be so likeable in her small house in London. Now the look of her and the way she acts is so utterly off putting. What I find though is they don't fall off the face of the earth? I wonder when her number will be up? You can't always be in vogue.

The irony (and it's a huge irony) is that before she/they were 'instafamous' they already had it all. Jobs they loved. Beautiful, healthy kids. Gorgeous house - that they took pride in doing up themselves. Nice 'stuff'- I remember Simon bringing her back a Chanel bag from a trip to America and she was so excited. Lots of holidays. A social life despite kids. I don't like talking about appearance but yes her bloody teeth were lovely before.
That's why they were popular. That and the fact that they seemed relatable. They were like us, but that little bit glossier.
I wonder if they often don't think was it worth it? Do they really seems happy? Her with the drinking and partying. Him with the ramblings.
The fact that they're both on insta means there's little respite from it.
I'm someone in a fairly similar situation - a midwife with multiple young children and I admit I used to feel quite envious. Mainly of the childcare and support they got from their mother in laws rather than the other stuff.
It helps to remind me of what is important. Because I would not swap places with her in a million years. I'll happily keep my nan bathroom with rotting carpet and leaky bath. My charity shop clothes. My staycations. My yellow, wonky teeth. Because none of that shit matters. It is a healthy reminder to me. And may be why we are all so obsessed with it? That they have all the stuff we're told by advertisers we need and it hasn't made them happy. The very stuff they tried to manipulate us into needing has actually fucked them over. Sweet irony.
The whole situation reminds me of that kids book 'a squash and a squeeze'. Or other kids stories where a lady is unhappy with her lot and then is granted a wish by the genie (instagram). Yet despite all the wishes in the end she realises she was happiest to start with. The FODs to me are a reminder to be grateful for what I've got and what truly matters. And bless them I'm grateful to them for that.

 

[CyanideKiss]

Irresponsibility? What, like broadcasting your exact address + the exact school your children attend + the exact days when your eldest daughter is home alone, after school + exactly when your house is left standing empty when you're on yet another freebie holiday + leaving your older daughters wide open to ridicule from their peers due to their Dad's excruciating antics on social media & their Mum informing over half a million people every time she has her period.

Irresponsible, like that?

 

[skronkywildcat]

Don't be fooled by the crap that I flog
I'm still, I'm still Clemmie from the blog

 

[Pommes]

FOD is a good photographer. He knows how where to sit his children, where the light is and how to capture a moment, so his children always look perfect in photos. Clemmie Telford just doesn’t have that magic polish: she probably puts up the photos she takes, whereas the ODs probably take 150 photos and then post the best one. Honestly the kids all look the same! Stick them in the best light, with the best clothes, pulling best faces and boom...100,000 likes.

Completely with you here. After about 1,000 attempts I take a photo of my children which proves my theory that they are the most beautiful beings ever created. However in the 999 others one will be squinting, a nose might be running, and they will definitely be looking in the wrong direction.

On a different note...

One of the loudest complaints about the Instamum gang that I read on Tattle is the total invasion of their children’s privacy for likes and revenue. Let’s not lower ourselves to share our opinions about how those children look, because they are children with no control over what is posted of them or who views it. Children who should be protected. Children who have personally done nothing to deserve the unsolicited opinions of anonymous folk online.

Writing online about their appearance makes us no better than their exploitative parents. However opinions about said parents who have full control over what they post... well that’s fair game!

 

[Lbl0082]

FOD is using the kids again to sell us Sky Broadband

Did you see the lady who said ‘please start your post with AD so I can decide if I want to watch it or scroll past’

Get told FOD

Good on you girl

 

[Tothemoonandback]

Unfortunately, her NHS income will be a drop in the ocean. I would say he’s the bread winner by far.

You know she earns thousands off her Instagram though right?

The discussion has moved on but can I just say that discussion about the size of MODs teeth and her body is pretty pathetic. Any high-ground we have is totally lost when we start talking about appearance.

I appreciate the whole “women supporting women” rubbish has been totally hijaked by these middle class instamums. “Supporting women” suddenly just becomes about buying their overpriced products and saying “love you Hun” on their gusto posts that aren’t correctly labelled “ads”. Having said that, women really should not be criticising another women’s appearance. Let’s stop that

 

[bettyjune3017]

What bugs me about her constant absence is definitely the class divide of it all. Say she was living in a council house, minimum wage yet off out every weekend... NO ONE would be commenting on her pictures saying 'you go girl' 'you deserve this' 'well jel bbz'. She would be ripped to shreds. But hey, if you're a midwife incase you didn't know she is! Own a huge house, and earn a massive salary selling absolute shit to people online... off you trot! Seems like this site is the only place that sees through people like this and I salute you all!

 

[ThreeFourFive]

Fair enough, it just seemed like it was all getting a bit serious when really it's obvious we're all going to have differing opinions. Tattle has sort of made me realise I don't really like any influencers at all if I ever even did. Its so obvious now who is milking the freebies and the ones who aren't just seem like try hard wannabees. The bubble has definitely started to pop, I think!

Theresa May's salary last year was approx £150,000 and she has been hugely commented on, criticised and discussed. Only inevitable then that a 34 year old who works one day a week, has bought a huge house in the time of generation rent, holidays with more frequency and luxury than most people can dream of, wears non-stop gifted, but undeclared, clothes, serves up every inch of her childrens' lives for public consumption, is vague to the point of deceptive about the environmentally disastrous "renos" to her house and earned £240,000 last year should attract comment and, yes, the odd bit of flack.

 

[motherofdonkeys]

Is that an ad for avocado?, was the avocado gifted? Is the avocado now hoping for a gifted hoilday?

 

[AfroCircus]

So many saddening stories here about new mums feeling guilt tripped by insta mums like Saint Clemmie.

I’m not a mum myself but I do work with children of all ages and I can categorically day: they do not want or need all of the shite that is pushed as ‘must haves’ to families. The best care you can give a baby is to wrap it in a sling around you and provide it with love and attention. That’s...it. You don’t ‘need’ expensive cots, toys and prams (don’t get me started on prams ). You’re all fantastic mums and don’t deserve to be made to feel so rubbish.

 

[Coffee-Addict]

I used to follow her because she was quite nice when her heard wasnt up her own ass . I unfollowed her after she did an advert for uber babysitters - you dont know the babysitter you just ring them up and they come and babysit for you not knowing you or your children . I asked her why on gods earth would you leave your babies with someone you had never met . Her friend messaged me to say i was jealous of MODS celeb status ... yeh ok MOD you have celeb status but i have integrity AND i dont leave my child with strangers

 

[GreyWolf]

To be fair sometimes you get what you pay for with products and other times its over hyped.
I have two tripp trapp high chairs that we still use now ! My boys are 13 and 16 so well before the insta influence crept into our lives! My lads now use them at their desks !

I agree with them being good quality (picked one up from a selling site for £10) but at a time when I was quite low and vulnerable these things were being rammed in my face, without any clue they were gifted. Here was this NHS midwife recommending Stokke cots and Sleepyheads, deliveroo was a newborn necessity. The obligatory me time getting £200 Rigby and Pellar bras fitted () Clothes which weren’t too twee for the twins, Zara came up trumps. It just went on and on. And there was me with my one takeaway a year and a rolled towel trying to impersonate a sleepyhead, and a £13 Ikea high chair. Feeling utterly shit about myself. But replying to stories and commenting as it all seemed real.

 

[Exhaustednurse]

The whole insta flogger and midwife just doesn’t sit right with me. I’m a nurse (almost 30 years) and Clemmies moral compass is way off mine. She knows that she her sales are based on needing vulnerable women to identify with her. This just doesn't sit aligned with our ethos as health care professionals to do no harm and the advocate for those that can’t for themselves.

And the one day a week is laughable when she’s then giving career advice

 

[rainbowlemon]

Someone mentioned Courtney Adamo's account being taken down previously and I googled it as I wanted to see her take on it:

https://babyccinokids.com/blog/2014/06/20/sadness-and-outrage-and-gratitude-all-in-one/#comments

Amongst all the other comments I found this one:

The people who point out that child molesters and perverts and sex offenders will enjoy the photos are not eroticizing images of barely-clad children. The child molesters and perverts and sex offenders who download these photos and use them for sexual pleasure are the ones who eroticize them. The people who urge you to think about who is using these photos for their own sick purpose are looking out for your children. The child molesters and perverts and sex offenders absolutely will not report you to IG because they want you to keep posting the pictures.

Some of us, through our work or our personal experience, are very familiar with the child molester network. Pictures like the one you posted of your child exposing her underwear will be downloaded and shared by child molesters all over the world. Even after they are taken down, they still exist on hard drives and thumb drives. They will be passed around, shared, bought and sold, and used by child molesters for their own sick purposes. How would you feel if your daughter, when she grows up, is contacted every time the police arrest someone with her images on their computer? How do you think she will feel when she finds out that her mother made the pictures available to these perverts by posting them on the internet? That perverts have been using her image for sexual pleasure for decades and there is nothing she can do about it? If you think this cannot happen to you, you are dead wrong.

Honestly I think it’s sad that this nameless, faceless monster that is IG takes your children’s safety into consideration more than you, their own mother. And that you’ve re-posted the photo here, seemingly out of defiance, and not based on the best interests of your child. Is it more important to be right than to keep your children safe?

Sick people exist in this world. They do terrible things to children every day. They use innocent photos of children for sexual pleasure every day. We all know this is wrong, but it happens. Every day. We can stick our heads in the sand and pretend they don’t exist, but they still exist. Acknowledging that they exist and taking steps to protect our children does not make us the monsters or the perverts. It makes us concerned parents who put our children’s safety above our need to be right.