Niomi Smart #44 She ‘got it done’ with Forky in bed, then moved to Bali and brought a Donkey to her shed

[ava2014]

I sense something weird about her presence at the moment, seems like she is in some kind of manic episode? I'm not diagnosing here, just speaking from experience... Something is just off

Now I definitely think that something is really wrong with her. I don't know anyone that is so fake and som focused on not being single on their 30st. I also don't believe that she hates London, people were jealous of her life in her beautiful apartment in Notting Hill. People will lose interest in her if she goes to live in Bali because her content will be so repetitive.

I also think that she is scaring of the life coach. He must feel overwhelmed.

 

[Cherry Waves]

She is clearly very eager to show off this guy. Looks like Terrina approves!

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She’s acting as if she were coming home from a military deployment. This annoys the duck out of me so much!

 

[Coldfeet]

OMG Forky is a saint compared to this guy. This is definitely the downfall of perfect Niomi, what a mess. I miss her Kate Middleton year. Even though she was very smug and acted like everything was perfect it felt like escapism. Now I worry about her, bringing home a sex addict she know for some weeks. And not visiting her family. I also think her family is mad with her because it didnt seem like they welcomed her on the airport after not seeing her for so long.

So it's ok to calk him a 'sex addict' but not laugh about his teeth??

 

[irvinelane]

So much fried hair in just one photo

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Genuinely surprised her first stop in Lordon wasn't Larry King the Hairfryer.
And I also believe if I saw her irl (like the other tattler) my arm would be the same size as her leg

She should have worn sunglasses as well to hide those sad eyes.

 

[bluestone]

Did they delay the party because she came back a week later ? They really do everything for her when she does so little for them

 

[Callan]

I wonder if she was looking for a dude who is willing to live in Bali for weeks and months at a time then to go to UK with her, win win for Nims.

 

[Critchley]

She’s acting as if she were coming home from a military deployment. This annoys the duck out of me so much!

^^ Exactly this!
The surprise party from her family was as if she came home from a military deployment, but the cold and aloof way she greeted Daisy Mae was more reminiscent of how you would greet an acquaintance at a work party. Not to mention Lordon McDonkey looming in the background like a spectre.

This is complete speculation, but my intuition tells me that Niomi is depressed to the point where Verity is overly concerned and doesn't know what to do. Why else would a mother set aside her grief (over the death of her parent) to coddle and worship her 30 yr old daughter returning from a VACATION??? And why is Niomi showing literally no joy at seeing her cute little sister?
Even excluding the jarring presence of Lordon, there is something deeply wrong with this picture...

 

[Nitfey]

I sense something weird about her presence at the moment, seems like she is in some kind of manic episode? I'm not diagnosing here, just speaking from experience... Something is just off

I thought the same as well. Something is way off. She has like manic episodes followed by mega down periods. I don't know how she will pick up herself after this one...she is in that manic episode that she could possibly follow and move to a place where that guy goes but the fall from it will be extremely dramatic.
I think her family is treating her still like a small little victim because she was dumped by joe. They allow her egoism and narcissistic side to grow without any limits. Poor little thing being 30 and not married...
Her life, career is in shambles. I don't know how the eff she will come back to any stability...

If my best friend came back with a life coach creep from Bali, I would have a serious conversation....

 

[StillLucilleBluth]

I actually feel bad for Lordon, he must feel so incredibly awkward just being shoved into a huge party where he knows nobody and doesn’t even know Niomi that well! It’s my worst nightmare

 

[Callan]

They are way too nice to her, Verity had to organize a bday party for Daisy while organizing a funeral then a party for Niomi who came back from 7 weeks of doing nothing. They always send her flowers when she moves while she never seems to do anything for them, other than showing up every few weeks with a gifted comforter she dumps on them.

I think she's been coddled too much. She doesn't do anything, she's always on vacation and she's still the victim. Makes my brain hurt just thinking about it.

 

[judgejohndeed]

See this is also why I just can't get behind a theory that Niomi is happily casually dating or something...she's known this guy what 6 weeks? 7? And taken him home to meet the family. It's way too much too soon yet AGAIN. Hasn't Terrina been married several times? I think Niomi is definitely looking for a whirlwind romance resulting in a speedy wedding.

 

[Callan]

See this is also why I just can't get behind a theory that Niomi is happily casually dating or something...she's known this guy what 6 weeks? 7? And taken him home to meet the family. It's way too much too soon yet AGAIN. Hasn't Terrina been married several times? I think Niomi is definitely looking for a whirlwind romance resulting in a speedy wedding.

Yeah it's fine to date around, go at it, but to take every guy home no matter what, that's embarrassing.

 

[StillLucilleBluth]

I was about to ask if it was possible they were just friends… then I saw the photo of them in her latest post. How naïve of me

 

[pointblankperiod]

Aaaand now he’s on her IG feed. Let the shitshow begin, grab your popcorn gals x

 

[Ciri]

wedding and baby incoming soon. Just need to wait for Terrina instagram approval !

 

[Callan]

lolz..

 

[sydneybarrett]

Love how she tagged everyone but him to keep up the ~mystery~
Chill princess, we already know he's a scammer life-coach and former sex party organizer.

(do you think some of her idiot followers seeing him from the back might think she got back with Joe lol)

 

[queenamber]

^^ Exactly this!
The surprise party from her family was as if she came home from a military deployment, but the cold and aloof way she greeted Daisy Mae was more reminiscent of how you would greet an acquaintance at a work party. Not to mention Lordon McDonkey looming in the background like a spectre.

This is complete speculation, but my intuition tells me that Niomi is depressed to the point where Verity is overly concerned and doesn't know what to do. Why else would a mother set aside her grief (over the death of her parent) to coddle and worship her 30 yr old daughter returning from a VACATION??? And why is Niomi showing literally no joy at seeing her cute little sister?
Even excluding the jarring presence of Lordon, there is something deeply wrong with this picture...

Lordon McDonkey has ended me

 

[Shutterbug99]

So Verity organised a surprise party for Nims on what is her own (Verity's) birthday. You couldn't make this up. And Nims said she almost ruined the surprise by staying in Bali. So she was about to extend her trip again to stay in Bali for this guy?!

Oh my, he is on the grid already. It took Forky months to make it on there!

 

[mg95]

I’m struggling to even understand the timeline of when she met and started hooking up with Lordon McDonkey… She said she was only looking for friendship, we saw her hanging out with other guys like the photographer, she followed Dettol Daddy back on instagram, and then bam her birthday hits and it’s all about this guy? So presumably they’ve been hooking up for like 2.5 weeks?? What on earth… Imagine being her family seeing him all over her and carrying her off like that and he’s a total stranger.

All I see is