Harold has written some letters in an attempt to defuse the situation
'Dear Mr Lozza,
jack says she's very sorry. she didn't mean to sue you. it was just the lumbago talking. she has been having a terrible time what with me being so busy in the pig hat shop and she is EXHAUSTED
please don't sue jack back, she will give you a rusty spoon of your choice to say sorry
thank you for the fiver, it'll help me get something nice to get back in margaret's good books
i must end here, there's an alligator in the bathtub
best,
OH'
'Dear LJC,
thank you for your sound advice, I'm sorry I ignored it. she's gone off on one again and she says I can't leave until I draft a good apology tweet
you're good at making apologies for jack. help me, ljc, you're my only hope
yours, forever in hope,
hazza'