That's because she fancies us.She's very odd regarding us of late. Not just the mentions but the frequent comments about trying to wind us up? All a bit strange.
Jack Monroe #268 May I ask where you work?
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Admit it - we all love Telly Jack. Jackovision.
I'm not from NI, so I can't say I've ever indulged in this uniquely regional flavour combination of egg and onion together. 
This latest horrific recipe:
Why? Why all the extra unnecessary babble? Her recipes would be about 10 words long if you cut out all the random asides.
Jack Monroe encourages her readers to put sticky wet French toast directly onto the worktop.
This latest horrific recipe:
Why? Why all the extra unnecessary babble? Her recipes would be about 10 words long if you cut out all the random asides.
Jack Monroe encourages her readers to put sticky wet French toast directly onto the worktop.
Oh please please let it be Challenge Anneka
Ugh, I bleeping hate sandwiches even more now.
Her dream is probably something to do with having the last laugh on tattle, so I for one welcome our new CEO!
If by 'wind up' she really means 'make laugh', then yes, it does!
Things like this make me rage. I bloody love sandwiches but they do not need a whole chapter in any book. At most they need a small summary which says:
"Do you like a certain food and also like bread? If yes then you may enjoy a sandwich by putting that food betwixt some bread. If you don't like a certain food then you probably won't like a sandwich which contains it. If you don't like bread then a sandwich may not be the right choice for you, sorry hun."
LJC even recipe books that have a whole section for stuff like Omelette recipes grind my gears. Just put in the recipe for a basic one and then maybe suggest some filling combinations, don't waste paper by writing the entire recipe each time just to reach your word count.
(I'm not sure why my phone thinks Omelette is a proper noun but who am I to argue with it?)
Thank you - I’m not Jack!Did you manage to heal the ligaments yourself in a matter of minutes? Did this actually happen? Would you ever keep donated money?
If you answered no, yes and no to the above, you are probably not Jack
Right I'm going for one of the following.
1. Guest presenter on Have I got News for You
2. Loose Women
3. Some reality bobbins (I'm including celebrity competitions here)
4. Antiques Roadshow (getting a valuation for her tired old tale of woe)
5. Bit part in Eastenders as a scrappy little stall holder who trips over an escaped sausage dog and is mates with Janine Butcher or whoever is in it now.
1. Guest presenter on Have I got News for You
2. Loose Women
3. Some reality bobbins (I'm including celebrity competitions here)
4. Antiques Roadshow (getting a valuation for her tired old tale of woe)
5. Bit part in Eastenders as a scrappy little stall holder who trips over an escaped sausage dog and is mates with Janine Butcher or whoever is in it now.
I was fed up with sandwiches hours ago, bore off Jackie!
She’s probably got all this shite lying about at home, she’s a shoo-in!
I'm having soup for my lunch tomorrow 
Wait, there’s something she’s “secretly” done “for over a decade”?!
Like bollocks you have Jack with you posting even the most trite minutiae of your entire life and leaving a slop-smeared trail of it all across Twitter for the last ten years
Like bollocks you have Jack with you posting even the most trite minutiae of your entire life and leaving a slop-smeared trail of it all across Twitter for the last ten years
I know, all this sandwich nonsense is making me happy to be having leftovers instead for lunch today!I'm having soup for my lunch tomorrow
Could it be that Tebbut is moving on from Saturday Kitchen, and although he refused to work with Jack, he was more than happy to suggest they get her in as his replacement so that he can watch the whole thing go down in flames from the safety of the house. We can only dream 
Whatever it is - and I hope she gets it or the lights will be OFF/depression will return because it only appears when she's not getting her way - she'll get bored after two days once the Twitter buzz wears off and the excuses will begin for why she can't continue with the commitment. Too much like hard work, it's easier if y'all just donate directly to PayPal instead. Cheers!
Might sound harsh new readers, but it's the circle of Jack and it's what she does every time.
Whatever it is - and I hope she gets it or the lights will be OFF/depression will return because it only appears when she's not getting her way - she'll get bored after two days once the Twitter buzz wears off and the excuses will begin for why she can't continue with the commitment. Too much like hard work, it's easier if y'all just donate directly to PayPal instead. Cheers!
Might sound harsh new readers, but it's the circle of Jack and it's what she does every time.
On a late night grunk.
Oh God, the books - the never ending, always on the cusp of publication books! Which book will the sandwiches be in?
Chapter IV: Destitution Sandwiches...can’t wait.
Oh give it up squigs! Jack knows ALL the sandwiches ever invented.
I did fancy a sandwich earlier but couldn’t be arsed with all the bread cutting and the smearing. I scarfed a large bag of salted popcorn instead – spite does give you an appetite.
I’m guessing the BIG THING is not food related. A regular TV/radio/paper slot? (Loose Women is a good call) Hoping for something celeby though – got to make this aneurysm worthwhile.
Oh God, the books - the never ending, always on the cusp of publication books! Which book will the sandwiches be in?
Chapter IV: Destitution Sandwiches...can’t wait.
Oh give it up squigs! Jack knows ALL the sandwiches ever invented.
I did fancy a sandwich earlier but couldn’t be arsed with all the bread cutting and the smearing. I scarfed a large bag of salted popcorn instead – spite does give you an appetite.
I’m guessing the BIG THING is not food related. A regular TV/radio/paper slot? (Loose Women is a good call) Hoping for something celeby though – got to make this aneurysm worthwhile.
Just got woken up by my wife's cat prancing about, hoping Jack interviews better than she does on live TV. Also think it's great how she's basically had the squigs write an entire chapter of her next book for her, even though it'll never get finished.
And if the aneurysm can wait til my annual leave finishes that'd be great, ta Jack.
And if the aneurysm can wait til my annual leave finishes that'd be great, ta Jack.
I'm hoping it's presenting the news. Imagine how many times per program The Poverty™ could be mentioned: I'm Jack Monroe, I went to a food bank and sold my lightbulbs so I really understand what the people are going through with this volcanic eruption.
Or maybe Match of the Day. She knows so much about kicky ball.
Has to be TV. I thought initially something restaurant based but that's really hard work with actual long hours
Or maybe Match of the Day. She knows so much about kicky ball.
Has to be TV. I thought initially something restaurant based but that's really hard work with actual long hours
Kind of redundant to even ask - but were the job at rehab and the nutrition degree outright lies then?
Her job interview for her dream job, hopefully it is for something on the telly - but we all know Jack's skill at building up quite mundane things so who knows. Maybe it is to be one of those fake friends who appear at the dinner parties at the end of Nigella's programmes - the ones who sit around shovelling banana skin curry into their gobs declaring it 'simply divine darling!'.
Her job interview for her dream job, hopefully it is for something on the telly - but we all know Jack's skill at building up quite mundane things so who knows. Maybe it is to be one of those fake friends who appear at the dinner parties at the end of Nigella's programmes - the ones who sit around shovelling banana skin curry into their gobs declaring it 'simply divine darling!'.
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