Bubblesandflowers
VIP Member
Emma reading late last night thinking Tony might be snapped up by a tattler
- Notice
Maybe Tony assumed you wouldn’t be eating pizza two days in a row on account of your FUCKING WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY
Noseynigel
Active member
It’s a Christmas (shop formerly of holt) miracle!
ReginaPhelange
Active member
Title suggestion.
Emma Drew 13: Clothes are too tight. Size 16 nowhere in sight. Bought a Christmas shop filled with...
Emma Drew 13: Clothes are too tight. Size 16 nowhere in sight. Bought a Christmas shop filled with...
CheekyCrackerLover
VIP Member
the fact Tony slagged off someone for having their gut out 
least they’re weren’t on Instagram in their fucking pants and with a fan on their bollocks like him
least they’re weren’t on Instagram in their fucking pants and with a fan on their bollocks like him
snoopyboop
Active member
Emma Drew #13: reverse body dysmorphia, spending disorder, free cat hair with every (formerly of Holt) order
Some way too early suggestions for the next thread title (just because I have way too much fun thinking of these) 
Emma Drew #13: Gurning on the stairs, mystery boxes full of cat hairs, Santa simply despairs!
Emma Drew #13: Nor-folk-ing clue! Everything is at fault with The Christmas Shop (formerly of Holt).
Emma Drew #13: Gurning on the stairs, mystery boxes full of cat hairs, Santa simply despairs!
Emma Drew #13: Nor-folk-ing clue! Everything is at fault with The Christmas Shop (formerly of Holt).
justherefortheattachments
Chatty Member
Everyone: Hi Emma, can you give me some money saving tips?
Emma: Sure! What you need to do is spend all of your money on food, get so fat that you have to spend £10,000 on surgery but continue eating the food which you can't fit in your stomach so you need to throw away.
Then, you need to buy lots of tat including cat toys, mermaid books, anything that says 'boss babe' on, clothes you can't fit into and don't forget the diet coke you aren't meant to drink!
Everyone: Ok, can I have some money making tips?
Emma: Sure! Firstly you'll want to do no work at all and then answer 10 emails a day. Phew! You must be exhausted after that. Now it's time to open a Christmas shop!
Everyone: How's that going to make money?
Emma: ....
New followers here for WLS content: Hi Emma, can you give me some tips?
Emma: Sure! Firstly, you'll want to keep eating everything you did before.
Everyone: Even the things that the doctors have said not to?
Emma: Of course! You will also want to ignore all of the advice that the doctors have given you about going for walks. It can help with cancer, but na let's not do that. You'll also not want to dive too deeply into WHY you are an emotional eater. The surgery will sort out all of your eating problems
Emma: Sure! What you need to do is spend all of your money on food, get so fat that you have to spend £10,000 on surgery but continue eating the food which you can't fit in your stomach so you need to throw away.
Then, you need to buy lots of tat including cat toys, mermaid books, anything that says 'boss babe' on, clothes you can't fit into and don't forget the diet coke you aren't meant to drink!
Everyone: Ok, can I have some money making tips?
Emma: Sure! Firstly you'll want to do no work at all and then answer 10 emails a day. Phew! You must be exhausted after that. Now it's time to open a Christmas shop!
Everyone: How's that going to make money?
Emma: ....
New followers here for WLS content: Hi Emma, can you give me some tips?
Emma: Sure! Firstly, you'll want to keep eating everything you did before.
Everyone: Even the things that the doctors have said not to?
Emma: Of course! You will also want to ignore all of the advice that the doctors have given you about going for walks. It can help with cancer, but na let's not do that. You'll also not want to dive too deeply into WHY you are an emotional eater. The surgery will sort out all of your eating problems
LittleBird
Well-known member
Emma Drew #13 - I'm sexy, I'm cute! (I'm popular to boot! I'm bitchin', great hair! The boys all love to stare!)
The bits in brackets are probs too long but couldn't resist
The bits in brackets are probs too long but couldn't resist
Of all the shitty things I’ve seen shitty Instagram personalities do, this by far takes the biscuit. It absolutely breaks my heart to think of all the people young old and everything in between fighting for their lives, enduring gruelling treatment after treatment that makes them so incredibly sick, all the family members and friends who also feel like they’re fucking dying inside watching from the sideline. Then you’ve got this fucking big fat gunt lying to people about having cancer. Emma you are the absolute lowest of the low, you are a scum bag, you’re a liar, a con artist, lazy, selfish FUCKING WEIRDO. Pity you can’t pay 10k for a personality transplant because you’re always going to look more Ursula then Ariel, ‘Princess’. Nothing can change what a vile person you are. Now go and stuff your face you horrible pig. 
Dear Mrs Griffi.... Drew
I’m happy to report you don’t have cancer now and you didn’t have cancer then. If your gunt starts to hurt you’ve probably stretched your thumby tummy.
I’d also like to point out to you that most of my patients stopped wearing Ted Baker dresses in 2012 and wearing sunnies on your head with glasses on your face makes you look 57.
With regards to your tic-tac-teeth, please contact my colleague in our dental department to discuss your treatment options, they usually recommend swimming the length of a 12 metre pool a few times a month as a cure for that.
Apologies you couldn’t bring your husband to your last appointment, during Covid we’re trying to keep poncy touchy behaviour to a minimum in the hospital. I hope he’ll be glad to see your gurning face when you receive this letter.
If you post this letter on your Instagram please don’t forget to tag us in!
Yours, Dr Nick (off of the Simpsons)
I’m happy to report you don’t have cancer now and you didn’t have cancer then. If your gunt starts to hurt you’ve probably stretched your thumby tummy.
I’d also like to point out to you that most of my patients stopped wearing Ted Baker dresses in 2012 and wearing sunnies on your head with glasses on your face makes you look 57.
With regards to your tic-tac-teeth, please contact my colleague in our dental department to discuss your treatment options, they usually recommend swimming the length of a 12 metre pool a few times a month as a cure for that.
Apologies you couldn’t bring your husband to your last appointment, during Covid we’re trying to keep poncy touchy behaviour to a minimum in the hospital. I hope he’ll be glad to see your gurning face when you receive this letter.
If you post this letter on your Instagram please don’t forget to tag us in!
Yours, Dr Nick (off of the Simpsons)
Inchhighprivateeye
VIP Member
LOVE IT!
Attachments
JulieScoobyDoo
VIP Member
Well there you go. She never had fucking cancer. We called bullshit right at the beginning. Cancer cells dont miraculously vanish or get washed out by Costa Frappucinos
She really is vile
Bubblesandflowers
VIP Member
fiffle-faffle
Well-known member
She is fucking vile.
I had to have a hysterectomy in my mid thirties due to cancer.
When I received my letter to say that I was cancer free, I fucking sobbed. It wasn't even a surprise as I had already been told in person but to get it in writing just made me bawl my eyes out all over again.
'Sexiest letter' - you nasty bitch. You have no idea, really no idea.
I had to have a hysterectomy in my mid thirties due to cancer.
When I received my letter to say that I was cancer free, I fucking sobbed. It wasn't even a surprise as I had already been told in person but to get it in writing just made me bawl my eyes out all over again.
'Sexiest letter' - you nasty bitch. You have no idea, really no idea.
justherefortheattachments
Chatty Member
I'm sorry but is it just me that thinks she looks like she should be a man called Barry?
Emma's daily to-do list:
- wake up around midday
- have a go at Tony for not working hard enough since 9am
- do an instagram live in a dress that has been stretched out so much, it now fits
- browse tedbaker.com and treat yourself to a size 8 dress for the future
- scare treeko and all the other cats
- send tony to his room to play warhammer and to get out the way
- upload an insta photo of the tiny bit of food eaten at lunch (exclude the 5 sharing packs of sweets from the pic)
- leave tony at home and go to the gym - sit in the pool and do no exercise but strap your apple watch to the nearest swimmer to do the laps for you, so u can later add a screenshot of the stats to the gram
- head back and shout at tony and the cats
- upload a broken bauble onto the christmas shop and charge £8.99
- plan the cancer story out about the miraculous recovery so no one suspects a thing
- 5 minutes of tony touches before bed
- Sleep
- wake up around midday
- have a go at Tony for not working hard enough since 9am
- do an instagram live in a dress that has been stretched out so much, it now fits
- browse tedbaker.com and treat yourself to a size 8 dress for the future
- scare treeko and all the other cats
- send tony to his room to play warhammer and to get out the way
- upload an insta photo of the tiny bit of food eaten at lunch (exclude the 5 sharing packs of sweets from the pic)
- leave tony at home and go to the gym - sit in the pool and do no exercise but strap your apple watch to the nearest swimmer to do the laps for you, so u can later add a screenshot of the stats to the gram
- head back and shout at tony and the cats
- upload a broken bauble onto the christmas shop and charge £8.99
- plan the cancer story out about the miraculous recovery so no one suspects a thing
- 5 minutes of tony touches before bed
- Sleep