Jack Monroe #568 Things Jack doesn't understand - Gaslighting, Gas heating, Gastronomy

[L3moning]

I’m actually a cafetière. (And also late to the joke).

This reminds me of one of the stranger lines in the history of The Simpsons, I think one of the Halloween episodes, which ends up with one of Flanders' kids coming out with the phrase "I'm a torso!"

 

[MaineCoonMama]

This reminds me of one of the stranger lines in the history of The Simpsons, I think one of the Halloween episodes, which ends up with one of Flanders' kids coming out with the phrase I'm a torso!

Rod...Todd....This is God.

 

[CrackingOwlSanctuary]

The term "walty" (or walt) is generally used across the services for people who are "in" but just a bit.. Jack. Prone to fantasies and exaggeration.
I think her lie is stretching that term though tbh.

The police also describe excessively gung-ho types who tend to buy very expensive accessories and get involved in kerfuffles off duty as "job pissed" but medical emergency services have adopted "Ricky Rescue" for the same sort of situation eg paramedics that are SAR volunteers and special constables or similar.

I can't think of a word for outright faking but if I come across one I'll report back.
Wannabe might be a reasonable fit for now though.

I always thought Walt was never served but pretended they did, bloater was did serve but told everyone they were on the balcony for the SAS when actually they were in the catering corps.

Jack actually bloats her dad over and over again as a Para to the extent he has issued his own correction on her wikipedia entry, essentially the Royal Artillery were attached to a Para brigade for some operation and Jack has decided that means she can tell everyone her dad is a Para, I can only imagine his despair, especially as he seems very proud of his service and is still active in a group to do with it now.

I think it does sum her up though, especially the way she tries to co-opt her Dad and Brother's service into her being 'military round the edges' whatever that means. Even that is all sterotypical, I've met people who are ex-forces who are ultra organised and I've met others who are complete slobs, just like any other walk of life. Jack is definitely the type to do one day of basic training then drop out and wear a veteran's pin without shame.

I think the closest term I can think of for her is catfish, except not just for romantic partners but everything. Like some kind of personality vampire who absorbs whatever she thinks is most advantageous at that point in time until she feels a better one has come along.

 

[Five hundred dogs]

I’d say the right term is pathological liar. Whatever situation she’s in and whatever person or group of people she’s addressing she’ll say the thing she thinks will get her the most clout, attention or sympathy, or all three. Regardless if that something has even the slightest relationship to the truth or not.

 

[PunkyMonkey]

I always thought Walt was never served but pretended they did, bloater was did serve but told everyone they were on the balcony for the SAS when actually they were in the catering corps.

It might have evolved a bit linguistically, but "never served" as its starting point definitely makes sense because it's often used for PCSOs, private security etc, sometimes probationers, but essentially those not on the front line. In policing anyway.

My military terminology is limited to (actual) Para speak thanks to some mates, but damn, that really must have been a crowded balcony eh?
The number of blokes trying to use that line to impress someone alone would have collapsed the thing!

I do seem to remember "jack" meaning lazy, precious and incompetent actually though, maybe that's what she means by military around the edges here?!

 

[Hollaaa]

By sheer coincidence, I've just driven past a military round the edges roundabout and felt compelled to share.
Safety fans, this a screenshot from Google maps and I'm in the passenger seat.

 

[Onestorytoomany]

Whenever i doubt what goes on here, i remember when She said that herself that members of her own family and friends, possibly including L had their head turned by here. Now if ruinous runours came out about someone in my close circle, i would be certain if they were not true, my head wouldnt be turned by some bores house fraus.

 

[Lobster Johnson]

It might have evolved a bit linguistically, but "never served" as its starting point definitely makes sense because it's often used for PCSOs, private security etc, sometimes probationers, but essentially those not on the front line. In policing anyway.

My military terminology is limited to (actual) Para speak thanks to some mates, but damn, that really must have been a crowded balcony eh?
The number of blokes trying to use that line to impress someone alone would have collapsed the thing!

I do seem to remember "jack" meaning lazy, precious and incompetent actually though, maybe that's what she means by military around the edges here?!

My family has a naval background and 'Jack' there is a rating. Similar to 'Tommy' in the army.
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View attachment 2866858
By sheer coincidence, I've just driven past a military round the edges roundabout and felt compelled to share.
Safety fans, this a screenshot from Google maps and I'm in the passenger seat.

Good field of fire there.

 

[CrushedIcePlease]

In her hair is…her hair. It’s the Rambo hairband made out of the piece of her own hair. Adorned (as Nazi Shitrag Daily Mail likes to say) with what looks like that angry flower in your avi and a shell off the MOD beach, lovingly assembled by the light from the window, filtered through the many layers of voile. (while cowering in fear at knocks, soap, soup and death threats at the door)
View attachment 2865948View attachment 2865951
Guess you’re doubly fucked on that one this week, pal Rainbow Brite. What with you on MN and on here and all that…

ETA: ss @Peachy9 and @Pocahontas

Mood indeed.

bleeping hell the state of her

 

[YerDa]

If the only worth this little corner of the internet has is to make sure every time she raises her head the truth about her is widely publicised, it justifies the threads continuing.

The visibility of her grift as evidenced in the wiki made so many people more critical and careful. It’s also shown the way a grift be dragged into the light, so no chancer can feel safe any more.

I also really appreciate how much more aware I am personally of how narcissist traits manifest. It’s been an education.

Anyway, TYFATD, ninnies of the canal!

 

[StringyMango]

What is happening here they look a bit like undercooked cookies

What fresh Hell is this??
I've been around for a while now and I am still seeing stuff that I didn't know about.

 

[DinosaurSenior]

"Photography Model Jack" always reminds me of the faded photos in the window of a hairdressers that haven't been changed since the 80s

 

[moldwarp]

Might have had an early midweek drink... Was not prepared for those pictures. Scary AF. What did she Google to achieve this, bad acid trip portrait mode?

So funny you said that cos acid trip is exactly the vibe I get from it too. It looks like something I might have hallucinated whilst lying in a field on an epic comedown circa 1992. For some reason I can’t look at that pic of Jack without Ebenezer Goode playing in my head.

 

[Five hundred dogs]

"Photography Model Jack" always reminds me of the faded photos in the window of a hairdressers that haven't been changed since the 80s

 

[Captainmouse]

This temu price drop alert from Vlad sums up guest.
View attachment 2866344
Cheap, fake, nasty.

#thread title

 

[Lobster Johnson]

So funny you said that cos acid trip is exactly the vibe I get from it too. It looks like something I might have hallucinated whilst lying in a field on an epic comedown circa 1992. For some reason I can’t look at that pic of Jack without Ebenezer Goode playing in my head.

Got any Veras?

 

[hereforthechaos]

So funny you said that cos acid trip is exactly the vibe I get from it too. It looks like something I might have hallucinated whilst lying in a field on an epic comedown circa 1992. For some reason I can’t look at that pic of Jack without Ebenezer Goode playing in my head.

I'd be terrified if I saw that looming over me with a slop offering. Ebenezer Goode is a tune though. I'll be raving in the car on my home!

 

[rage naan]

I always thought Walt was never served but pretended they did, bloater was did serve but told everyone they were on the balcony for the SAS when actually they were in the catering corps.

Jack actually bloats her dad over and over again as a Para to the extent he has issued his own correction on her wikipedia entry, essentially the Royal Artillery were attached to a Para brigade for some operation and Jack has decided that means she can tell everyone her dad is a Para, I can only imagine his despair, especially as he seems very proud of his service and is still active in a group to do with it now.

I think it does sum her up though, especially the way she tries to co-opt her Dad and Brother's service into her being 'military round the edges' whatever that means. Even that is all sterotypical, I've met people who are ex-forces who are ultra organised and I've met others who are complete slobs, just like any other walk of life. Jack is definitely the type to do one day of basic training then drop out and wear a veteran's pin without shame.

I think the closest term I can think of for her is catfish, except not just for romantic partners but everything. Like some kind of personality vampire who absorbs whatever she thinks is most advantageous at that point in time until she feels a better one has come along.

guest: my dad was a paratrooper royal marine commando navy seal!

people: no he wasn't, here he is saying so

guest: you have STALKED me, what kind of nutcase combs through internet receipts so obsessively?

she's the dictionary definition of darvo

 

[Carefree]

View attachment 2867055

Although she wishes she was this gorgeous.

 

[moldwarp]

I haven't gone near The Mothering Place since lockdown. It had already become an odd place and seemed to have lost the gentler side to it that I'd really benefited from in many ways but something shifted and it felt highly strung, humourless and quick to attack.

I discovered Tattle a bit ago and it was a revelation. The difference in tone being the most striking. It's obvious there are folk of all backgrounds and exkerience here but there is a communal spirit and acceptance of all that has kept me company lately on long painful nights.
Wit, insight, diligence and a disinclination to put up with subpar media darlings who need to be told all about themselves. For my money, this thread is doing society a grea5 tservice. It's a warning to any Wannabe Grifters that the grift may be sprung quicker than they expect and Tattle will be there to document it and broadcast the goings on.
And if they don't like it, we'll thats fair too, but that's the game yiube chosen to play so tough tittie.
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I honestly can't deal with thar Pound land Nigella pose up there. Its so demented.

Yeah Mumsnet is mad now isn’t it. They’ve all gone really nasty. I sometimes used it in all seriousness way back and it was cliquey as hell but supportive. Now it’s like, someone will post asking for support to leave their abusive spouse and keep full custody of their kids and the first replies will be all THIS IS YOUR FAULT FOR HAVING CHILDREN WITH THIS MAN or YOU ARE CLEARLY NOT A RESPONSIBLE PARENT TO PUT YOUR CHILDREN IN THIS SITUATION.

I date Mumsnets true downfall to the start of the CoL crisis cos interest rates went up and all the Boden mummies suddenly got hit with the realisation that their mortgages were too big and they could no longer afford to buy seitan and massive salads to enable them to maintain their size 8 figures.

Oh dear, how sad.

Although ironically it is now the kind of place where someone like Jack would genuinely be told she should’ve kept her legs shut.