Yeah, I'm pretty sure if you begged any hotel to remove alcohol from the mini bar for reasons, you'd open it to find one each of still and sparkling water, diet and regular cola, and tonic water.I'm not a celebrity and I don't get to stay in posh hotels, but I've stayed in a lot of hotels while travelling for workand I have *never* seen a hotel minibar stocked with that much stuff, alcoholic or not. Fool.
Jack Monroe #553 Fairytale of No Pork
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Yeah, if you're plugging something then it's even harder to get paid decently. Book promo stuff generally pays tit, even if you're a big name. What guest is talking about is corporate bookings and events where you're there for who you are or what you know, rather than trying to flog something.
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100% agree dear BSlops. She knows how to make a living from her lies. But it is also true that you might not get what you ask for - that's why you have an agent to do it for you, and to say no on your behalf when people take the piss
Obsessed with Hole? Sorry, Jack, whatās that? Hole? Nope, means nothing to me. āHoleā indeed. Iāve never heard such rubbā¦. Oh, Courtney Loveās band, Hole. Well, why didnāt you say so.Iām belaboring this point now, I know. But Teen Jack models her lewk on āpsephologistā Courtney Love and continues to be a REBEL at 23 when she ādiscards her birth nameā, via a brief foray into the ās*x industryā (why the * in SEX?), other errrā¦ āartistic pursuitsā, and minimum wage labourView attachment 2620021
Yet by age 24 models herself on Anne Diamond.
View attachment 2620026
And by 25, pride of the WI Jack instead models her lewk on āvision of elegance, fragrance and radianceā Mary Archer. View attachment 2619994 And at 26 is terrified of YOUNGSTERS in states of undress.
View attachment 2619996
View attachment 2620003Thanks to @Marmalade Atkins for the ss, including the one of TeenCourtney LoveTammy Girl Baby Spice right there.
ETA: Yeah, youāre really rocking that androgynous lewk skinhead and trousers there, Teen Tammy Girl Courtney Love Baby Spice Jack!
View attachment 2620009
PS Jack, see that mark on the screen after the āeā of Love, just before the āsā? Itās an apostrophe. Please look it up.
What did my kid say they say here? Your dadās a dinner lady and your mumās a binman.
I have a feeling the only Hole (Courtney Love's band) songs Jack knows would be Malibu and Celebrity Skin. The album they had to get Billy Corgin to help with because the four of them couldn't write a song good enough to record.Obsessed with Hole? Sorry, Jack, whatās that? Hole? Nope, means nothing to me. āHoleā indeed. Iāve never heard such rubbā¦. Oh, Courtney Loveās band, Hole. Well, why didnāt you say so.
PS Jack, see that mark on the screen after the āeā of Love, just before the āsā? Itās an apostrophe. Please look it up.
This has made me immeasurably sad and the writing is so on point. It also made me angry that this grifting parasite tries to write in such a way about her bleeping lies and she can duck off. Self centred little bleep.
My sister was killed at Epsom College. These are my letters to her
My sister was killed at Epsom College. These are my letters to her
I heard Big Billy C provided the occasional burger as part of the assistance package, what a helpful man.
I just want to know how she (carefully!) wedged a discman into her pocket. Another ridiculous lieā¦. Did she borrow Big Ds pantaloons to listen to Courtney Loves band?
How dare you, a smol pixie doesnāt have a normal, chunky discman like regular sized people, it was a ālittle discmanā, one of those special tiny ones only ickle wickle fragile girls with crumbly shoulders have.
In fairness it very famously recorded no viewers at all at least onceā¦ the show was fucked enough without Jack being allowed anywhere near it
Lovely to see the continued use of her name as an equivalence for shadiness. The door is firmly closed and bolted, Guset. I wouldnāt even bother knocking cos you canāt come back in.
Spookily, I am currently in the past reliving the threads where this absolute car crash of an interview took place, and very interesting it is too!
For those who werenāt around at the time (I wasnāt either, hence exploring the smorgasbord of bullshit now), this was the spate of interviews that she got off the back of the ONS releasing some stats that debunked her previous ludicrous claims about the inflation of value goods being many multiples of higher end goods (pasta up 344% etc). ONS research demonstrated that the rates of inflation they found were broadly the same across value and standard offerings.
Undeterred, Jack took to the airways to honk that she had been vindicated and that the findings had backed her up. Credulous interviewers failed to challenge her on this most basic fact- that the research contradicted rather than endorsed her claims. Other than the Telegraph, which ran a piece saying Nanny Nanny Boo Boos, Jack Wuz Wrong (I may be paraphrasing) whereupon our heroine threaten to sue them by setting paralegals on them.
Then she did this:
(SS from @Marmalade Atkins)
So I can well believe that the week included a massive bender, high as she was on the Grifty Kitchen photoshoot plus all the delicious attention. Christ. Just mind-meltingly unprofessional. She was all over the place in the ones she did show up to, quavery voiced, rambling, slurring, noticeably off her face talking to James OāBrien and looking like she slept in a hedge, despite obviously copious amounts of filler.
The thread where it goes down is round about here
should anyone fancy joining me in days gone by! I am agog about how she makes the whole issue of the burgeoning cost of living crisis a three ring circus of āI was right haha!ā And āduck the Toriesā without so much as a brief detour into āhereās what people can do that might helpā.Jack Monroe #316 Bizarrely, Jack seems to have misread the research
Welcome to a late night new thread. Jack has just started tweeting, after going to bed two hours ago. Our winning title was from a newspaper article and nominated by @Nottonightbabe your prize is a bottle of lemon juice, opened and unrefrigerated BUT it is famous and has been on the BBC News-...
tattle.life
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@Seaford Haggington cheers for the shrunken headed selfie and as we like to say way down yonder here in Tblisi, bless your precious heart for the inspiration, chickadee!
Sounds a bit odd, I guess, but @FunnyFuneral (hope you are doing alright, tenderstem) do you have a discount scheme for multiple burials, um, of the same person? Asking for a friend.View attachment 2620362View attachment 2620363
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Grunking, again. (Why is the Fred so damned busy suddenly?!!)You know when youāre so used to something you stop seeing it and then all of a sudden, something new clicks.
I just canāt any more with her.
View attachment 2619900View attachment 2619903
Why on earth would you even be āwonderingā?! How about taking the guitar you donāt even know how to actually play, you thick (fantasist) duck?
View attachment 2619910 View attachment 2619911In the sage words of @DisgruntledGoatJust as was about to hit post I remembered from this ss provided by @DisgruntledGoat that she DID in fact āpawn the guitarā.
She then didnāt have a guitar until either Leggy (Feb 2014-May 2015) or LJC (April 2017-May 2020) bought her TWO guitars. View attachment 2619922So she most definitely in December 2013 did not have that guitar that had moved with her twelve times (or that she told the Guardian, also in December 2013, sheād had for ten years) and that it was her New Yearās resolution to play in 2014. No sireeeeee (Sideboard) Bob. No guitars to see here.
View attachment 2619929FFS she canāt even tell the truth about how long she was with the āex-partner over the TWO YEARS we were togetherā who imaginary-replaced her PAWNED GUITAR. She was with LJC for three years and Leggy for 15 months!
ETA: LOL no bleeping way!
View attachment 2619942
Dunno how to describe this (and only 1 wine in!) but there used to be these books where you could flip over various sections of the page, and choose an outfit, or different parts of animals, or text.
The canal could make something available for sale by door to door encyclopedia salesman just of the many lies she has told about EVERY moment of her publicly-lived, stream of consciousness, "life".
And nope, I don't need a job, but she does. She can wander around doorsteps flogging it! Invoice in the post, Jack.
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What I hadn't clocked before now is how quickly it had been debunked.Spookily, I am currently in the past reliving the threads where this absolute car crash of an interview took place, and very interesting it is too!
For those who werenāt around at the time (I wasnāt either, hence exploring the smorgasbord of bullshit now), this was the spate of interviews that she got off the back of the ONS releasing some stats that debunked her previous ludicrous claims about the inflation of value goods being many multiples of higher end goods (pasta up 344% etc). ONS research demonstrated that the rates of inflation they found were broadly the same across value and standard offerings.
Undeterred, Jack took to the airways to honk that she had been vindicated and that the findings had backed her up. Credulous interviewers failed to challenge her on this most basic fact- that the research contradicted rather than endorsed her claims. Other than the Telegraph, which ran a piece saying Nanny Nanny Boo Boos, Jack Wuz Wrong (I may be paraphrasing) whereupon our heroine threaten to sue them by setting paralegals on them.
Then she did this:
View attachment 2620350
(SS from @Marmalade Atkins)
So I can well believe that the week included a massive bender, high as she was on the Grifty Kitchen photoshoot plus all the delicious attention. Christ. Just mind-meltingly unprofessional. She was all over the place in the ones she did show up to, quavery voiced, rambling, slurring, noticeably off her face talking to James OāBrien and looking like she slept in a hedge, despite obviously copious amounts of filler.
The thread where it goes down is round about here
Jack Monroe #316 Bizarrely, Jack seems to have misread the research
Welcome to a late night new thread. Jack has just started tweeting, after going to bed two hours ago. Our winning title was from a newspaper article and nominated by @Nottonightbabe your prize is a bottle of lemon juice, opened and unrefrigerated BUT it is famous and has been on the BBC News-...tattle.life
19 January, Guest: "Woke up this morning to the radio talking about the cost of living rising a further 5%. It infuriates me the index that they use for this calculation, which grossly underestimates the real cost of inflation as it happens to people with the least. Allow me to briefly explain."
30 May, ONS: "Nope. It's bollocks."
They still did more work debunking it than she did producing it.
Jack loves holes. They're like a small well!Obsessed with Hole? Sorry, Jack, whatās that? Hole? Nope, means nothing to me. āHoleā indeed. Iāve never heard such rubbā¦. Oh, Courtney Loveās band, Hole. Well, why didnāt you say so.
PS Jack, see that mark on the screen after the āeā of Love, just before the āsā? Itās an apostrophe. Please look it up.
Letās Kickstarter the tit out of that, mofo! Iām IN! (Itās harder to describe than an indescribable process Jack would IRREGARDLESS describe as Roald Dahlās Matilda).
Jack Monroe #548 Recipes that come with a side of electrocution and burnt down house for pudding
I think Iāve said this before but she looks like sheās forward rolled through a charity shop in Marylebone
tattle.life
Would you settle for @FunnyFuneral and @Captainmouse sharing the burden so you can come back as a haunted spectral image in tulle? You have to give up a hand tho.
(I make no apologies for reposting that vid)
Yup, she loves a hole so much that she's dug herself a big one and is currently refusing to come out.
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