Hand jobs for handijobs.
Apologies i just watched motely crue's the Dirt and its addled my brain.
Apologies i just watched motely crue's the Dirt and its addled my brain.
She's such a predictable head. And, she never would, and has never tried to either. It's the ultimate manipulation tactic. She's a nasty piece of work.BREATHING KLAXON
I so want this as a thread title but I know we won’t be allowedShe spends every night on her own, cramming coke up her collapsing nose
BIB for thread titleHow does one go about trading sexual favours for paint? Is it like 1l of F&B for O levels, 2.5l for A levels? Does one have to leave the tin of paint on the dresser beforehand? I can imagine it’s a dodgy business. Lots of punters filling up the posh cans with Wilko paint to fool the poor working girls. It’s sad really. Lots of them get hooked on Dulux at first because it seems like innocent fun and then a couple of years on they’re turning tricks for F&B sample pots just to get through the day.
This may be one of the few times when she got talked out of doing something. I can see her wanting to do it because she knows more than anyone else about everything. But Rosemary or Carole or whoever might have convinced her that ending up looking like an utter twit who knows eff all about cooking would not be helpful.I’m pretty sure Jack has claimed she was asked to do Celebrity Mastermind. For once I think she might have been telling the truth, the bar is really low for that as they go through a lot of contestants. They had Charlotte Crosby on once, who is demonstrably neither a celebrity or a mastermind. I imagine Jack turned it down because she can’t stand being wrong about anything or looking like there’s something she doesn’t know. I can just imagine her if she got a question wrong “Well actually Clive, as a visual learner, a literal food expert and someone who can’t lie, I think you’ll find that sardines are one of the classic ingredients of puttanesca.”
“72 baps, Connie. You slice, I’ll spread”Funeral spuds ?!
What's wrong with an egg butty and a cheeky meat pie with wilted lettuce.
Imagine prostituting yourself for paint? Is this where she gets her 'sex work' from?She’s swapping her unruly labia for two tins of farrow and ball. Very enterprising you have to say.
Wait, I missed Caroline dropping in for tea?!sorry I’ve realised my thing about lukewarm tea seemed aimed at you (which is very mean of me!) and it wasn’t at all, just the thread interlocutor claiming to be Caroline was incredibly dull haha.
I strongly advocate for a “give me all the dirt on…” as an approach to get friends to spill but I’m an incurable gossip and a person of no decorum so appreciate your reticence haha.
Surely it should be Boulevaaaaard?
p.s. duck off to bed, Jack - you said you were going to sleep an hour ago you twit.
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It’s a serious problem for her brand because “young single mum turns creative to feed toddler” vs “single middle aged coke head whose lost parental responsibilities manages to feed cat” isn’t a wide niche marketing demographicInteresting she can deploy the cat and dog (because she reads this - hi bleep face) but can’t deploy Johnny on a whim because…
He. Doesn’t. Live. With. Her.
Thank god.
What about some Prince?I can claim that a few threads back!
SB doesn't know mama's getting hot
At the Dulux shop
Doing something unholy
God she is tedious. She could have picked any lyric about anything the human mind can imagine and she goes for Billy Bragg doing the administration of human affairs. Honestly someone should do a song about poors, bins and dog tit. Jack would explode with excitement.Surely it should be Boulevaaaaard?
p.s. duck off to bed, Jack - you said you were going to sleep an hour ago you twit.
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