Jack Monroe #437 C U Next Wednesday

[Amanda Lin]

Needless to say it turns out I actually AM ill and haunted.

Please donate to my paypal for the exorcism

 

[Lucky Escape]

Spoiler: OT another thread

it's lovely to rub shoulders (sorry for bodily analagy in totally yuk circumstances) with so many other fraus on the bear thread) Not even going to mention Yakult

Shite, I cocked that up.

Right back on topic, ummm, give me a moment...

Edit: I wonder what Jack is doing for Christmas? Anyone got any predictions?

My prediction: she'll not have moved yet, and her house will be so full of packing boxes that she'll be forced to decamp to the shed. (Never mind, Jack, it'll be good practice for living in the not crappy four bedroom studio flat that Big Dave's buying for you you're going to RENT.)

This means she'll need to buy huge amounts of improbable emergency kit: solar heaters, expensive down jackets, wind-powered head torches, mountaineering-grade folding chairs, etc. The cold will cause her bones to crumble, and she'll be forced to set up a hot tub which she found in a puddle. She'll run this at max temperature... the leccy bill? who cares, she's cancelled her direct debit and is moving out soon, so it'll be the next tenants who have to deal with getting a prepay meter installed.

Christmas dinner will be cooked on a gel fuel stove, and won't actually be ready until the day after boxing day. The only solid part of it will be the gravy, and she'll spend New Year's Eve in hospital with a mystery case of listeriosis.

 

[Hunsgraveyard]

I keep thinking about her agent. At ehat point foes the hassle & reputational damage outweigh the 15% or whatever thst they make off her? I genuinely can't see what value Jack Monroe brings to that relationship

 

[houseofhoop]

I do understand changing things to suit your families and new traditions - one Finnish tradition is to have a rice porridge on Christmas Eve and my dad is Scottish so that changed to having oat porridge with sugar, cinnamon with an almond hidden in; a cool fusion of both sides of my family!

I do not understand totally changing recipes, masquerading as tradional recipes and being proud of presenting an abomination.

ETA: and the arrogance!

I have family in Finland and Norway and Christmas Eve is a big deal. So even though half of my family are estranged (religion has a lot to answer for), we make a big deal out of Christmas Eve too

 

[Observ@h]

May I softly, gently return to this tweet:

View attachment 1796434

1. who is going to laugh at this non hilarious quip: the cat? The dog? Will they be lolling about as if someone had sprayed gold paint on a triffle?

2.Why are you making jokes when your child is fragile and snuffling? And everything that exists in your world is between the snuffles (also, wut?)

She really, really, really shouldn’t have mentioned Grandpa Joe. Sat on his arse in bed FOR YEARS being waited on and paid for by the hardworking Buckets until there was a chance of a jolly, then - It’s a miracle! He can walk! “The trip of a lifetime is mine, thanks.” How Jack is that?

At least Grandpa Joe actually took his kid round the chocolate factory.

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

She really, really, really shouldn’t have mentioned Grandpa Joe. Sat on his arse in bed FOR YEARS being waited on and paid for by the hardworking Buckets until there was a chance of a jolly, then - It’s a miracle! He can walk! “The trip of a lifetime is mine, thanks.” How Jack is that?

At least Grandpa Joe actually took his kid round the chocolate factory.

Grandpapamama Jack. There was a brilliant gif by @Alansbigplate of Jack as Grandpa Joe back in the day

 

[Foxvint]

This is WILD. If I was Jack I’d be absolutely shitting myself about an exposé.

Re all the scammer stories of which our smol pixie sits atop the pile. The current mania for lived experience has enabled all this. The mic being passed to ordinary people to be able to tell their stories outside of legacy media is ofc a good thing but its led to a decline in good journalism with robust fact checking. Not everyone is a credible witness to their own lives.

 

[Smol Pixel]

I keep thinking about her agent. At ehat point foes the hassle & reputational damage outweigh the 15% or whatever thst they make off her? I genuinely can't see what value Jack Monroe brings to that relationship

Exactly this. And it proves that she is definitely still bringing in reasonable money or they would have kicked her to the kerb ages ago.

 

[Deeznutslol]

She really, really, really shouldn’t have mentioned Grandpa Joe. Sat on his arse in bed FOR YEARS being waited on and paid for by the hardworking Buckets until there was a chance of a jolly, then - It’s a miracle! He can walk! “The trip of a lifetime is mine, thanks.” How Jack is that?

At least Grandpa Joe actually took his kid round the chocolate factory.

100% Grandpa Joe was the ultimate scammer tbh, guy literally lied about being disabled

 

[Veronicaaa]

Re all the scammer stories of which our smol pixie sits atop the pile. The current mania for lived experience has enabled all this. The mic being passed to ordinary people to be able to tell their stories outside of legacy media is ofc a good thing but its led to a decline in good journalism with robust fact checking. Not everyone is a credible witness to their own lives.

I think it's also to do with the rise of confessional 'journalism' and writing, I think women in particular have been urged to mine their trauma for clicks for years now. It's a perfect vehicle for narcs.

 

[binkbonk]

Wonder if this where she got the idea (probably not)

 

[Veronicaaa]

Wonder if this where she got the idea (probably not) View attachment 1796591
View attachment 1796592

Imagine writing a recipe for a toastie lol.

 

[blurstoftimes]

Please, please let that happen. Carole Malone being AWAY brought my favourite thread ever*. It starts off pretty normal, then we get some forensic Jack Covid timelines, then it gets a bit grim, but then it descends into some kind of SEO chaos.

The whole thread was around 24 hours, in that weird week between Christmas and New Year.

Jack Monroe #123 CAROLE MALONE IS AWAY

Sorry to just jump in, I definitely missed it but who is Kirsty Strickland and what’s her relation to all this? Shes a queen who first came to our attention here, on “Krish mate“ day! https://tattle.life/threads/jack-monroe-93-i-cant-believe-shes-no-butter.10498/post-2698304

tattle.life

*yes even more favourite than thread 31. More lols and less Jack.


ETA. SO much happened in that thread, but somehow we found the time to explain Jimmy Nail to all our Fraus outide of the uk!

i'm pretty sure the SEO chaos happened at around 2am on a weekday night as well

 

[jenny2603]

I think it's also to do with the rise of confessional 'journalism' and writing, I think women in particular have been urged to mine their trauma for clicks for years now. It's a perfect vehicle for narcs.

It would be wrong to invent a story, even if it was a credible one that did appear to offer useful evidence to a particular cause but why do narcs have to elevenerife everything? It's never. 'her is my experience and here is what helped', it's always 'and then my legs fell off and a derailed train drove over my head'.

 

[Shimmering]

i'm pretty sure the SEO chaos happened at around 2am on a weekday night as well

I was re reading that thread last night and nearly had an aneurysm laughing at @ReginaPhalangee 's response to the first SEO post that was just "wut?"

 

[Onestorytoomany]

May I softly, gently return to this tweet:

View attachment 1796434

1. who is going to laugh at this non hilarious quip: the cat? The dog? Will they be lolling about as if someone had sprayed gold paint on a triffle?

2.Why are you making jokes when your child is fragile and snuffling? And everything that exists in your world is between the snuffles (also, wut?)

I always found it odd that all of the grandparents were infirm enough that they had to take to their bed. Most of the old people i know/ have known nornally have an armchair in the corner.

 

[Observ@h]

100% Grandpa Joe was the ultimate scammer tbh, guy literally lied about being disabled
View attachment 1796577

They nicked the idea off me and didn’t credit me send dopaminos

 

[EllaEm87]

Christmas tips

Air fryers are bleeping awesome for meat, roast vegetables of all kinds: potato's, parsnips even roast carrots.
petitpois are awesome and everybody loves them.
loads of stuff including pigs in blankets, roasties, yorkshire puddings can be cooked in advance and reheated.
Gravy can be done beforehand.
in fact 90% of tit can be done even days before the big day to save you time.
nobody really likes wet stuffing, bake the duck out of it and crisp it up.

I'll take my book deal now thanks.

#ChactFeckerXmasTips

I really want this book! It’s released after Christmas sadly but his Instagram is drool worthy!

 

[CabalofBolorneaise]

Did anyone see this last week, from Jack’s agent? I never seen it on here so apols if posted already.
Interesting that Jack no longer mentions her agent in the bio but she’s clearly still there.
View attachment 1795279

I never thought her agent dropped her. I think they put a different email in the bio to try to keep all of Jack’s stuff in one place that maybe she + agent has access to and to stop her agent getting constant emails from trolls/flying monkeys/casual observers. The poor woman’s email inbox was probably dominated by Jack at the height of the kick off, removing her email and her name from Jack’s bio makes sense.

Edited because distracted by child and pressed send too soon - they must be making good money off her, and I think if there was any prospect of dropping it would quietly gently have happened several chaoses ago.

Her crises online probably sell books, and both her agent and the one whose a publicist/therapist have historically basically encouraged the start of spirals either via direct engagement or by liking tweets. The duty of care seems to be somewhat lacking given that while Jack’s excuses etc may well all be lies, I believe she has been genuinely ill at various points and you’d expect an agent to have tried to step in for her own good, not encourage her and then stay mysteriously silent when the inevitable going too far happens.

 

[Polly Morphus]

I keep thinking about her agent. At ehat point foes the hassle & reputational damage outweigh the 15% or whatever thst they make off her? I genuinely can't see what value Jack Monroe brings to that relationship

The same value she brings to all her Jackolytes - they help out a Poor Little Match Girl, and the payoff is that they get to pat themselves on the back over and over and over. Middle-class smugness - more addictive than heroin.