Jack Monroe #437 C U Next Wednesday

[Onestorytoomany]

I thought the nature of an oncologist job was to be friendly. I mean they are giving people the worst news of their lives, seeing them through tremdous pain and hardships. I mean forgive me, but i would say empathy would be almost important as their qualifications.

Not everyone is a snarky little twit to their clients petal!
The only time i could see one being pissed off if is someone is sadfishing for attention etc.

 

[traumatised sideboard]

Does anyone know if Carole Malone is going AWAY this year? I've been saving up my veg peelings for two years in anticipation.

 

[Feck]

I think a lot of recipes have been deleted from her blog, but most are on Archive.

Christmas – Jack Monroe

web.archive.org

And here’s some vintage Jack I found along the way. Finnish Christmas dinner with weird little fish as an alternative to prawn cocktail. But then, I should cut her some slack since she was also a sex worker/sleeping rough at this time.

Jack Monroe's budget Christmas | Food | The Guardian

<p><strong>Jack Monroe:</strong> A fish starter followed by baked ham and a tasty casserole, with fruit tarts for pudding. This Finnish-inspired menu is easy to prepare, costs under £2.50 per person and is delicious</p>

amp.theguardian.com

I don’t know how accurate this tool is, but it gives you estimated sales based on rank. Her bestsellers rank is 12,979 overall in books.

View attachment 1795384

"I'd like a few peppercorns, a bay leaf and a teaspoon of mustard, if you please?"

*Slaps 11 pence down on the shop counter.*

She's a stinking sprat.

 

[Archduchess of Luxembourg]

"I'd like a few peppercorns, a bay leaf and a teaspoon of mustard, if you please?"

*Slaps 11 pence down on the shop counter.*

She's a stinking sprat.

I have a ham ready for Christmas and she has sullied it.

 

[thisgloveisdeceased]

I’ve done the doors off tour of Oahu and there is the Dole Plantation from the helicopter! Miles and miles of ground growing pineapples. And the Dole Whip soooo good!

I have actually visited the Dole Plantation in Oahu and can confirm that the gift shop sells pineapple themed EVERYTHING but you cannot buy a pineapple. Needless to say they had the last laugh.

 

[Witchfinder Sargeant]

This is only partially on topic - it’s relevant to Jack breadcrumbing illness, as she recently did about SB - but remember how she posted that “chat with a friendly oncologist” tweet? Well, does anyone ever wonder if she actually DID get an oncologist or two in her DM’s? And if she did, what do you think she said to them? Just imagining that it was probably an incredibly awk convo

If any friendly oncologist did slide into her DMs it would be to say "if you're worried, the first step is to make an appointment with your GP." The various medical governing bodies frown hard on making a diagnosis without seeing the patient.

 

[ChactFecker]

Christmas tips

Air fryers are bleeping awesome for meat, roast vegetables of all kinds: potato's, parsnips even roast carrots.
petitpois are awesome and everybody loves them.
loads of stuff including pigs in blankets, roasties, yorkshire puddings can be cooked in advance and reheated.
Gravy can be done beforehand.
in fact 90% of tit can be done even days before the big day to save you time.
nobody really likes wet stuffing, bake the duck out of it and crisp it up.

I'll take my book deal now thanks.

#ChactFeckerXmasTips

 

[AndrewsDaddy]

Someone is having a larf

 

[ChactFecker]

OK i'm gonna take a hit on this one but an American lady taught me how to make half decent yorkshire puds.

She calls them popovers.
but the recipe does work!



the most controversial thing is that the fat goes into the batter and NOT the oven tins.



i'm not joking it works!

 

[binkbonk]

Christmas tips

Air fryers are bleeping awesome for meat, roast vegetables of all kinds: potato's, parsnips even roast carrots.
petitpois are awesome and everybody loves them.
loads of stuff including pigs in blankets, roasties, yorkshire puddings can be cooked in advance and reheated.
Gravy can be done beforehand.
in fact 90% of tit can be done even days before the big day to save you time.
nobody really likes wet stuffing, bake the duck out of it and crisp it up.

I'll take my book deal now thanks.

#ChactFeckerXmasTips

I like wet stuffing

 

[ChactFecker]

I like wet stuffing

You were brought up wrong.
I'm so sorry for what you had to endure. - it's not your fault. i repeat, it's not your fault.

please accept these NOT dire potatoes (ensure you start at the timecode linked)

 

[Snotbuster]

Jack, sinä olet vittu, that looks nothing like maksalaatikko and you serve it with lingonberry you total twit.

Sinä olet koko kusipää.

My ancestors are actually offended.

Looking up the recipe shows that, at the very least, the liver is ground. Her pic looks like whole chicken livers sauteed with...something green? Not a casserole, really. The recipe for Joulutorttu also looks a bit off--like it would be tough. She has butter and flour but all the other recipes I saw had additional fat like ricotta, cream cheese, cream, or just more butter.

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

I think a lot of recipes have been deleted from her blog, but most are on Archive.

Christmas – Jack Monroe

web.archive.org

And here’s some vintage Jack I found along the way. Finnish Christmas dinner with weird little fish as an alternative to prawn cocktail. But then, I should cut her some slack since she was also a sex worker/sleeping rough at this time.

Jack Monroe's budget Christmas | Food | The Guardian

<p><strong>Jack Monroe:</strong> A fish starter followed by baked ham and a tasty casserole, with fruit tarts for pudding. This Finnish-inspired menu is easy to prepare, costs under £2.50 per person and is delicious</p>

amp.theguardian.com

I don’t know how accurate this tool is, but it gives you estimated sales based on rank. Her bestsellers rank is 12,979 overall in books.

View attachment 1795384

Noooo leave Finland alone. One of my great aunts is Finnish and her adult kids are over 6 feet, I wonder if I could get them to pick Jack up and hurl her in the sea* for Iku-Turso to eat.


* joke disclaimer because Jack has no sense of humour.

 

[CarmenGhia]

The Edinburgh Nutribullet is with me. Slopbot gave it to me.

 

[DinosaurSenior]

THIS is a Popover. .

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Someone is having a larf

Tbf, she is good at communicating her greedy need for money.

 

[Sideboard Bob]

The Edinburgh Nutribullet is with me. Slopbot gave it to me.

I feel like if Jack never posted on social media again, and stopped grifting, your post would just tie everything up so nicely.

“The Edinburgh Nutribullet is with me. Slopbot gave it to me.”

The End

 

[jenny2603]

Does anyone know if Carole Malone is going AWAY this year? I've been saving up my veg peelings for two years in anticipation.

Maybe they could bring Carole in as a replacement Jack whilst she's away sulking about being exposed as a stupid grifter. I think Carole could do a good chaos.

 

[ForgettyBetty]

"Friendly" oncologist means one who will give her a private consult for free.

 

[Sideboard Bob]

Maybe they could bring Carole in as a replacement Jack whilst she's away sulking about being exposed as a stupid grifter. I think Carole could do a good chaos.

Please, please let that happen. Carole Malone being AWAY brought my favourite thread ever*. It starts off pretty normal, then we get some forensic Jack Covid timelines, then it gets a bit grim, but then it descends into some kind of SEO chaos.

The whole thread was around 24 hours, in that weird week between Christmas and New Year.

Jack Monroe #123 CAROLE MALONE IS AWAY

Sorry to just jump in, I definitely missed it but who is Kirsty Strickland and what’s her relation to all this? Shes a queen who first came to our attention here, on “Krish mate“ day! https://tattle.life/threads/jack-monroe-93-i-cant-believe-shes-no-butter.10498/post-2698304

tattle.life

*yes even more favourite than thread 31. More lols and less Jack.


ETA. SO much happened in that thread, but somehow we found the time to explain Jimmy Nail to all our Fraus outide of the uk!