I suspect she wants the knives to look old and well used, once she bought them with her Patreon money, I reckon she buried them in the garden for a bit, bashed them about on the patio, added some SLOP, baked them in the oven and then VOILA, her knives look a bit like Allegra’s.
Jack Monroe #410 If you don’t give me money, the kid gets rickets
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That new profile photo looks like she’s tried to turn herself into the benighted love child of
Mary the Punk
That other absolute fantasist (and bee botherer)
Work enquiries like “Dear Rosemary, I am writing to enquire why that grifting charlatan client of yours Jack Monroe never seems to do any actual work in her “100 hour work weeks” and instead takes money from people while either providing nothing in return, or that she grifts into her personal accounts for other states purposes, and just keeps it?”
That sort of thing?
PS that parody account really needs to change its pic to that new one.
New recipe:
Buy premade cheese/ salad sandwich
Rinse off butter, cheese and salad
Put your own cheese inside of bread
Boom.
If Jack ever gets a statue, I will devote the rest of my days on this earth to ensuring there is always a traffic cone atop her head.
Do you think she applied all 78 of her lipsticks AT ONCE?
She’s facetuned herself into Anna Hathaway.
Why is she like this??
Why is she like this??
Je suis 
Thank you for this chaos, Jack. If I was a total idiot I'd pop something in your tip jar for the entertainment today.
First squig is (obviously) one of her slop-botherers.
Thank you for this chaos, Jack. If I was a total idiot I'd pop something in your tip jar for the entertainment today.
First squig is (obviously) one of her slop-botherers.
It's been a long time but I think I remember it being a rumour on the Mums of the Net (am I right in thinking you're not allowed to say that name here or am I being unnecessarily chaotic?). It was one of those "you'll never guess which celebrity is doing this" kind of Take a Break/Chat Magazine rumours. No idea what connected it to Jack though.Sorry if this has been asked/answered before, but I’ve seen lots of comments on theissue - is this based on anything specific like people seeing her out locally, or just linked to the way she behaves and the weird hours she spends raging on Twitter? I definitely think it’s v credible, but just wondered if there is any more to it that I’ve maybe missed?
check mate, pal
She’s reactivated her account already?!
I’m guessing she’ll be back and posting woe is me by 5pm this evening.
I’m guessing she’ll be back and posting woe is me by 5pm this evening.
being a benevolent ninny, I will supply mackie with some recipes 
as she’s sooooo busy
as she’s sooooo busy
From the new pic, I’m wondering if she’s hoping for the lead in the next James Bond film?
Dr Dr No
Three Diamond Rings Aren’t Forever
The Girl with the Golden Spoons
From Russia with Glove
Thunderclap
THAT MAN grew up in near Saffron Walden.
Makes you think.
Jack's achilles heel is absolutely a lack of ability to laugh at herself. This is why she has lost it now on twitter as she is being ridiculed. The rinsed hoops, the potatoes, parody accounts.
She doesn't mind so much any accusations of fraud, laziness etc, she is actually shameless like that, it is ridicule she simply cannot handle. So calls it 'abuse'.
Her FM's really are quite lacking in the brain department.
Great calculations @heretoreaditall2019
If she is making £2156/mth then that is about £32.5k per year, and we know that is a minimum amount. That’s higher than the average UK salary. Unbelievable.
If she is making £2156/mth then that is about £32.5k per year, and we know that is a minimum amount. That’s higher than the average UK salary. Unbelievable.
"No Time To Fry"
Maybe we could do future thread recaps in verse?
Why the quips?
Bee stung lips.
Why the drama?
Teeth like llama.
Why fraus feel dread?
Angora rabbit on Jack's head.
Why Canal wary?
Sharp knives scary.
Why I'm not fussed?
Knives have rust.
Insta was no success
Photos did not impress.
''Dog too fluffy''
''looking scruffy''
Then Jack went huffy.
Why return to hellsite?
Mainly spite.
Parody account so nice
Makes potatoes for brambly mice.
Why mice tears flow?
Monroe.
She not nice
just gathers endless hoard of spice.
(interchangeable, goes with rice).
Why the quips?
Bee stung lips.
Why the drama?
Teeth like llama.
Why fraus feel dread?
Angora rabbit on Jack's head.
Why Canal wary?
Sharp knives scary.
Why I'm not fussed?
Knives have rust.
Insta was no success
Photos did not impress.
''Dog too fluffy''
''looking scruffy''
Then Jack went huffy.
Why return to hellsite?
Mainly spite.
Parody account so nice
Makes potatoes for brambly mice.
Why mice tears flow?
Monroe.
She not nice
just gathers endless hoard of spice.
(interchangeable, goes with rice).
Some of the quote tweet replies to the daft mare’s post are 
And this one tagging in Mom and Martin Mate. Is this a pro Jack Stan or an anti Jack person?! WTF! “SEE THIS”
And this one tagging in Mom and Martin Mate. Is this a pro Jack Stan or an anti Jack person?! WTF!
“SEE THIS”
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Absolutely creased at the state of the thick squids running around like lemmings trying to report FakeJack and failing so hard. Even more proof that they're thick as mince.
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