Jack Monroe #410 If you don’t give me money, the kid gets rickets

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This seems to be going well for you, Jack.

Parody account was on 274 followers when you tweeted about them. Free publicity was a very kind thing for you to do.

It's like Patreon Watch, but with the figures going in the opposite direction

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How can we be sure who the real Jack Monroe is when she looks drastically different in every photo.
 
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I also struggle with this which is why I plan ahead and start things publicly when I have the materials actually ready. She could have called out of her twitter for writers to commission before announcing the project. I wonder if she ever even picked up her emails. She had people willing to help her.

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Her motivations are really clear. Financial gain and to get a lovely dopamine hit by getting praise for doing it. Once that's faded, she's no longer interested because she only cares about herself.

Not really sure why she launched a whole new twitter account and website for this. She could easily have made it a series on her regular website?
Another (hoped) revenue stream, innit.
 
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Just seen the parody tweet and then Jack’s tweet. 😂
She can give it out, but she can’t take it! I think that the parody account makes her look good. There’s a lack of of snark and narc rage!
 
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Hilarious! She really can’t take a joke can she. And so many squigs unable to find her account when making their report. Very funny.
 
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Absolutely h-owling and fizzing at the profile pic. The lips have officially reached cartoon proportions. Jessica Rabbit-esque.
 
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Hi ninnies - full Patreon update below. Sorry this is so LONG.

The top line summary for October 2022 payday is that she opened with 700 subscribers following a ~24 hour period of losses. Assuming our minimum revenue of £3.50 ps and highest possible platform fees of 12% this would be a min payment of £2,156 sent directly to Jack Monroe and away from charitable causes. I can’t say enough how much I think we’re underestimating her revenue with that minimum payment tbh.

She lost a total of 77 subscribers across the month of September 2022, and realised on October 2022's payday. This combined with +22 subscribers gained throughout September nets off at a loss of 55, or -7.3%. This is the highest level of churn we've seen since our records began, with the next highest at -4.4% pre-Nigella promo (occurring in June, August, and October 2021). We are in a CoL crisis so this high level of cancellation will likely somewhat be attributable to the wider economy, but fingers crossed the increased media scrutiny is impacting her scamming donations for personal gain.

Now for the longer form content that walks u through this project if you're interested, it is largely recycled from last month, but includes tracking going back to Feb 2021.
Methodology

We have a script that captures Jack's Patreon follower count every 10 minutes and saves a timestamp & that subscriber count to a database that lives on my server. This project started Feb 2021, but since then Graphtreon (link: https://graphtreon.com/creator/jackmonroe) has come on the scene, and gives us data to daily grain. I was relieved when comparing our vs their data that it reconciles so this approach works which is gr8 news/a huge relief.

The next stage is just to export this dataset to Excel and do some basic manipulation. So everything underneath 'Subscriber Movements' (header in pink) is known fact and verifiable to an independent source (Graphtreon). Unfortunately Jack hides her Patreon revenue figure so everything underneath 'Patreon Payday' is an estimate of how much she could hypothetically earn with such a subscriber base, using a number of reasoned assumptions. Detail of which is below:

Patreon Payday aka Mithering about FA

Firstly for clarification - "est rev @ £3.50ps" means the estimated revenue when we assume that 100% of subscribers are paying £3.50, we then deduct the worst case scenario of 12% platform fees* to give these net revenue figures.

There is absolutely no way for us to get more detail on the type of subscribers joining or who have been with Jack since she started her Patreon in April 2017, so there will always be a degree of uncertainty re: monthly takings. In detail:
  • We don't truly know the % of platform fees Jack is paying.
  • There is no way of capturing the split in her subscriber base between annual vs monthly subscriptions, so some months she may take home significantly more but this should net off across a 12 month period.
  • On the above - annuals are actually discounted at 15% so we run the risk of over reporting revenue across a 12 month period.
  • Jack repeatedly and publicly claims that over half her subscribers are only paying £1 despite a) this being a significantly harder checkout journey with ~30 clicks versus ~5** b) this being advised against by Patreon themselves due to their fee structure.
  • There is the option for custom subscriptions, and these default at £5, which is 43% higher than her minimum of £3.50
So to conclude - these revenue figures really are an estimate with a bit of give/take to what they could be. But considering the only people we see speak publicly of subscribing (whether it's on her Patreon comments page or Twitter) are subscribing to the more expensive physical rewards yielding tiers (£7, £10, £24 - heaven forbid lol) that it's improbable to me that her average per subscriber figure is just £3.50.

*When this tracker first began in Feb-21there was very little documentation on Platform fees available either in Patreon's documentation or online, I believe I took the highest rate found on a press release related to a round of investments/their valuation? Since then I believe documentation has been improved but we've stuck with the 12% fee for consistency. I'm not sure if this is something we should review, if anyone is super up on this please reply with the fee structure and I'll restate these net revenue figures. Sorry I don't have time to dig into this myself.
** Whoever calculated this please share exact numbers and I can credit you in this write up, again sorry I didn't dig into this myself.


Results & how to interpret them

Firstly a disclaimer - I've changed the table slightly so you may notice losses have moved down a row. Detail on this in the writing below, but anyway:

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Nonsensically we'll start with the 'Subscriber Movements' side, headed in pink

Using October 2022 as an example - she opened the month with 700 subscribers and was paid for such, with an estimated minimum revenue of £2.2k. We saw 77 subscribers leave (under losses) and 22 join (under gains), this nets at -55 subscribers or -7.3% month on month (MoM%).

Revenue is calculated as: (opening subscriber count * estimated per subscriber revenue) * 0.88. So this is net of her platform fees, but obviously not taxes - not that I imagine she bothers herself with such endeavours.

Playing around with per subscriber (ps) scenarios.

Conscious of our mithering, I'd like to highlight just how much of an understatement our estimated revenue is likely to be. The following table maps out what % of her subscriber base would need to be on each tier to create the average per subscriber scenarios we use in our 'Patreon Payday' section:

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In writing:
  • The assumption of an average of £3.50 per subscriber is possible with 100% of subscribers opting into her lowest pre-fabricated, marketed on the landing page ATL (above the line, e.g. you don't need to scroll or click to expand on the page), tier.
  • An average of £5.00 ps is possible with a near 50/50 split in her subscriber base to the two lowest tiers.
  • The £10.00 ps is a reach just playing amongst the 4 lowest tiers (<=£12 pcm) but is still feasible with this combo weighted towards the £12.00 tier. Please notice the more expensive £24.00 & £44.00 pcm tiers have not at all been considered: we are by no means reaching with our estimates.
Next steps

Jack continues to discredit any attempts to estimate her monthly Patreon revenue but has yet to click the button to show her earnings on Patreon, as recommended by the platform itself. Please empower your donors to make decisions that are right by them & their families as the economy continues to go to tit.

Oot (won’t let me tag u sorry!!) has flagged that there's another number available in platform (amazingly! ty for intel) so I'm gonna take a look at setting another script up that monitors that too, time permitting.
 
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Is she having a laugh with that profile picture? It’s absolutely bleeping ridiculous, surely she knows it looks absolutely nothing like her?
call me paranoid, but I wouldn't be surprised if she is fishing for jokes about the bad facetuning so she can claim people want her DEAD.
 
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The Bookseller gives one free article per month so some people might be able to access it below.


ETA: Archive Link https://archive.ph/LvFiN
Bluebird has netted Thrifty Kitchen and a free e-book of recipes from anti-poverty campaigner and "national treasure" Jack Monroe.
Publisher Carole Tonkinson acquired world rights from Rosemary Scoular at United Agents. Thrifty Kitchen, described as a "bumper household guide", will be published on 5th January 2023.
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Jack's publisher Carole at Bluebird/Pan Macmillan has put this out on bookseller (website and tweet) 3 months from release and pre-orders are now open on Amazon.
It's interesting Carole has retweeted it but neither Jack nor her agent Rosemary have.
Maybe Carole has told Jack to shut the f up on twitter in the lead up to the January release if her agent can't keep control of her? Take a 3 month hiatus from twitter, keep it to instagram and behave kinda thing? (good luck Carole)
I just can't see it being through Jacks own volition.
It's also interesting Carole is a registered therapisto :unsure:

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The way I RAN here after seeing that new profile pic.

But seriously....who TF is this? And where did she get those lips?

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I just let myself have a daydream moment where one of the FM's takes it upon themselves to bravely track down the instigator of the mean parody tweets for their queen and we get a full run down of their investigation only for it to go full wagatha christie and it ends up being jackie herself trying to curry back favour and sympathy.

Oh god I need a lie down.
 
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Pretty much permagrunking here but think I’ve caught up. That profile picture. She’s absolutely bleeping delusional isn’t she?

(There’s a bigger piece about how tragic it is that women, especially women who are heavy social media users, can’t be happy with how they look even if they’re perfectly nice looking.

Edited to add - I’ve actually just walked past two women who were probably perfectly nice looking naturally, but have turned themselves into what look like some sort of horrorpuppets by having really bad botox and ludicrous amounts of poorly-placed filler … all this stuff makes me so sad.)
I did parcel delivery work for a bit, and there came a point where I was just recoiling in shock at so many doors because of the lip fillers getting more and more and more excessive almost daily on certain customers.
 
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