Love it when you lot get creative 
Jack Monroe #262 Why you cry? No WiFi
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Love it when you lot get creative 
I was wondering why he is the only pet of hers to make it this far. He probably ate all the other ones too
I'm waiting for Tank Girl Jack to appear
Who do you think you are kidding Mrs Grifter
If you think the cabal’s done?
We are the Fraus who can stop your grifting game
We are the Fraus who will make squigs think again
So who do you think you are kidding Mrs Grifter
If you think the cabal’s done…
If you think the cabal’s done?
We are the Fraus who can stop your grifting game
We are the Fraus who will make squigs think again
So who do you think you are kidding Mrs Grifter
If you think the cabal’s done…
Wish me luck as I go out to buy
Cheerios, and who knows, Lots of clothes
Wish me luck and wave your money goodbye,
See my tear, Rishie dear, on my nose.
Cheerios, and who knows, Lots of clothes
Wish me luck and wave your money goodbye,
See my tear, Rishie dear, on my nose.
So this is Slopmas...what has Jack done?
Another Twitter chaos
Content free Patreon
Another Twitter chaos
Content free Patreon
Mrs Slop has got the trots
From eating her prune buns
But when she’s squatty-pottying
She is ready with her (bum) gun
I'm gonna hang out with my Patreons, going to spin them a line.
I've got 4 weeks dirty washing mother dear.
I'm gonna hang out with my Patreons, going to spin them a line
'cause grifting day is here.
I've got 4 weeks dirty washing mother dear.
I'm gonna hang out with my Patreons, going to spin them a line
'cause grifting day is here.
'We shall grift on the beaches, we shall grift on the landing grounds,
we shall grift in the fields and in the streets, we shall grift in the hills;
we shall never surrender.'
we shall grift in the fields and in the streets, we shall grift in the hills;
we shall never surrender.'
An ode to the grifter by Chact Fecker age, 41 and 1/2
In the South of the country is where you will find,
The griftiest of all grifters who is out of their mind,
Apple I-devices and luxuries surrounding the gaff
But a meal containing solids? Are you having a laugh!
Huge piles of letters are chasing old debt
Throwing around 96kg sideboards, not breaking a sweat
With a drawer full of phallus' if in need of a w*nk
Taking patreon subscriptions outwith a thank
80 hours a week with zero days off
Battling Asda, Morrisons, the Tories and Tesco
The grifter is BUSY, so kindly duck Off
In the South of the country is where you will find,
The griftiest of all grifters who is out of their mind,
Apple I-devices and luxuries surrounding the gaff
But a meal containing solids? Are you having a laugh!
Huge piles of letters are chasing old debt
Throwing around 96kg sideboards, not breaking a sweat
With a drawer full of phallus' if in need of a w*nk
Taking patreon subscriptions outwith a thank
80 hours a week with zero days off
Battling Asda, Morrisons, the Tories and Tesco
The grifter is BUSY, so kindly duck Off
Bravo all! You are all absolute gems, and very talented- thanking you all for the laughs. 
🧑
🧑
LinkedIn content is rly for agreeable morons
Jack's head will explode once she's grunked all this.
Whatever, squigs. You can have her.
She is as far away from a legend as one could possibly be and if they don’t see that then more fool them.
Jack, we see you, the majority might not, but minorities do sometimes win out.
"quietly humble"
do you like green eggs and ham?
If it’s too thin let’s add mashed up spam
maybe a dusting or whizzed up ness of cheese
Watch SB yodel, more Mumma, please!
I grind up black pudding, bake chicken for hours
I do not know the difference between flours
What do you mean, it looks like a plop?
This is delicious, elegant SLOP!
Just add any herb, it’s no matter to me!
I don’t eat it I get all my dinners for free
If LJC LEFT it was not because of the food
You’ve now put me in a furious mood!
How dare you, duck off, can’t you see I’ve had enough?
I’m fragile, delicate, not very tough
I’m so smol and so sick, so tired of your game
You nasty Fraus should hang your head in shame
Because I am Jack, I like green eggs and ham
But while you’re here, rattle rattle!
Because small boy needs jam.
If it’s too thin let’s add mashed up spam
maybe a dusting or whizzed up ness of cheese
Watch SB yodel, more Mumma, please!
I grind up black pudding, bake chicken for hours
I do not know the difference between flours
What do you mean, it looks like a plop?
This is delicious, elegant SLOP!
Just add any herb, it’s no matter to me!
I don’t eat it I get all my dinners for free
If LJC LEFT it was not because of the food
You’ve now put me in a furious mood!
How dare you, duck off, can’t you see I’ve had enough?
I’m fragile, delicate, not very tough
I’m so smol and so sick, so tired of your game
You nasty Fraus should hang your head in shame
Because I am Jack, I like green eggs and ham
But while you’re here, rattle rattle!
Because small boy needs jam.
Hmmm, you follow her closely do you?
Smells like, "There's some flavour of the month over there. Let me have some of that".
From Very British Problems:
Smells like, "There's some flavour of the month over there. Let me have some of that".
From Very British Problems:
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