Happy to teach you all I know, if you’ve got a spare 90 seconds later on
Jack Monroe #207 Jack Morley
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Is it too early for thread title nom?
#thread title jackflaps
you know when you're a kid and you dread going to a certain classmate's for a play date because their house gives off general bad vibes and the mum makes you feel homesick even if you're only there for the afternoon? that's jack *shudders*
The Cock soup shouldn’t have surprised us, from the edgelord that brought us the tattooed lady. Did you know she has tattoos?
Oh Vlad you’re so insensitive, when Jack has a grunk later she’ll be rocking back and forth shaking at the memory of selling her Omega Seamaster
She's normally stops at the (white as) mayonnaise aisle
Hi, P xHappy to teach you all I know, if you’ve got a spare 90 seconds later on
Jack has got a new niche, teaching the poors how to waste electricity and over-complicate simple food.
Moon has done a real chaos this time!
Tonight is like This is Your Life!! Welcome back L x
(if I have got this wrong will I have to beg the Mods for a name change so I can disassociate myself from all things criminal!)
When she told me to "swipe for a surprise" I made a short mental list of what said surprise could be. A dish with texture, perhaps, or a photo of a completed tax return. Maybe even a release date for the next slop bible, as unlikely as that is.
What I wasn't expecting was a regurgitated meme I remember posting on my Facebook about 15 years ago when I was still largely ignorant of world cuisines and thought anything outside my own narrow field of experience was something to be giggled at. For a LITERAL FOOD EXPERT to think posting that on her socials to be appropriate is...I can't even.
I still enjoy a good cock joke, but come on.
What I wasn't expecting was a regurgitated meme I remember posting on my Facebook about 15 years ago when I was still largely ignorant of world cuisines and thought anything outside my own narrow field of experience was something to be giggled at. For a LITERAL FOOD EXPERT to think posting that on her socials to be appropriate is...I can't even.
I still enjoy a good cock joke, but come on.
Ha ha, no, you haven't got it wrong my lovely x
You are still our master sleuth in all things Jack and Come Dine With Me related x
No word of a lie, your return as well as The Artist Formerly Known As Harry Bosch has made my day!
Cabal watching elementary and Sherlock is eating………………Apple porridge! 
I feel like everyone has rightly moved on, but I am totally hung up on her claiming to have created caramelised oats of this hue from....2 tbsp of sugar and some apples and apple juice. In a slow cooker on high for an hour and low for 8?! You can caramelise condensed milk in a slow cooker BUT that has vastly more sugar and only works if you keep it in the tin while heating it.
I think I'm in love with the moon app
The whole trainer debacle, it really is more shocking than just an innocent gotcha - she attempted to paint a picture this weekend, one of a super-mum being so busy during the week and catching up on family time by offering some imagined perfect day for her kid and all documented on social media. The sad fact is that she was caught using photos from different days which leads to the obvious question: is any single part of the fantasy true then? The thing with compulsive liars is that they don't consider "small" lies as being lies at all, they're totally shameless. She's an absolute charlatan milking the tiny amount of attention that she has for all its worth and with zero regard for objective truth. And she even has the bare faced cheek to promote herself as, mad as it may seem, a full-on, certified journalist (that of course being another "small" lie)
I'm sure we can schedule a minute, or maybe 90 seconds together soon. Tonight I've been BUSYHappy to teach you all I know, if you’ve got a spare 90 seconds later on
making granola
Sorry cables who are without.
a floating cowpat and powdered soup. just what everyone wants from their friendly local literal food expert!
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