Jack Monroe #181 Time flies when you’re judging slop

[LennyBriscoe]

Couldn't you have found someone to kick in the shins?


I'm pretty sure Jack invented Leon, did she not?

Slings of Leon

 

[MaineCoonMama]

Slings of Leon

Oooh, your kitchen's on fire.

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Erm no Squig, it's really not...

 

[moosesauna]

oh you crazy ADHDers, you really blow my mind! Doing things in a way us boring old old neurotypicals would never dream of.

I don't like how it connects editing and good syntax to something negative; if you're writing professionally you should at least try to moderate your writing style so it fits grammar conventions etc. Just seems like yet another thing for entitled people to jump upon in order to silence the people who critique them tbqh

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

She seems to have a skip permanently on the drive.

Imagine having a DRIVE and thinking you were poor, rental or not .

Imagine having OUTDOOR SPACE.

God she’s such an twatty ungrateful little beg.

 

[Cookiecookie]

Noting the plural of guesthouses

Slipped in along 'the I was so poor I sold my Omega watches and most of my Iphones' bollocks.

And if I dumped 50 black bags of rubbish outside on binday, it would get left, because stuff only gets picked up of it is on the wheelybin. Unless Jack was putting it in the famous communal skip.

Those guesthouses must've been right miserable tit holes to stay in. Piles of hoarded crap everywhere, and peeling woodchip. Absolute arseholes the entire family.

 

[moosesauna]

Erm no Squig, it's really not...

View attachment 536231

Well, she's already mastered the musical, comic film, live show recording...

 

[Eurgh]

Surely she would have used the app to find it and would have known it was on the floor of a c2c train and would have contacted them? I thought that was the whole damn point!!!

 

[Veronicaaa]

Those guesthouses must've been right miserable tit holes to stay in. Piles of hoarded crap everywhere, and peeling woodchip. Absolute arseholes the entire family.

You can get a decent amount even for a second hand Belfast sink. I'm now imagining Jack's grandpa as involved in some low-level OCG, using sinks as currency.

 

[LavaFlake]

I don't like how it connects editing and good syntax to something negative; if you're writing professionally you should at least try to moderate your writing style so it fits grammar conventions etc. Just seems like yet another thing for entitled people to jump upon in order to silence the people who critique them tbqh

As someone on the ADHD waiting list and who works in job where written communication is needed, it's insulting tbh.

Of course if someone struggles with writing then reasonable adjustments should be made but this isn't what it's about. It's like a badge of honour for some people.

 

[Captainmouse]

Surely she would have used the app to find it and would have known it was on the floor of a c2c train and would have contacted them? I thought that was the whole damn point!!!

But if she dropped her phone, and saw the tile bounce off, why not pick it up there and then? Not wait 2 weeks

 

[Sideboard Bob]

In restaurant parlance she did duck all. (pardon me for swearing)

You swore!!! I’ve updated your poem.

Why you cry?
Because of Manc Bee
What happened?
Manc Sweared
Again
Oh no, I’m sad
“duck all”
My shocked eyes
pardon me
pardon Bee

 

[Legionnairess]

You can get a decent amount even for a second hand Belfast sink. I'm now imagining Jack's grandpa as involved in some low-level OCG, using sinks as currency.

That’s what I was thinking re Belfast sinks! They always go for a good price at local auctions and salvage yards. Pretty sought after.

 

[Eurgh]

But if she dropped her phone, and saw the tile bounce off, why not pick it up there and then? Not wait 2 weeks

Because despite knowing the exact trajectory of the fall and the leverage required for it to come off, (Pythagorean) she can’t possibly have noticed as it was such a surprise when she saw it again... Did she do a little shriek I wonder?

 

[Veronicaaa]

You swore!!! I’ve updated your poem.

Why you cry?
Because of Manc Bee
What happened?
Manc Sweared
Again
Oh no, I’m sad
“duck all”
My shocked eyes
pardon me
pardon Bee

He's quoting restaurant parlance, though! (Can confirm, doing 'duck all' is bona fide restaurant parlance).

 

[Powershower]

She's so much better at her bootlicking unpaid influencing than she is at her contractual stuff.

View attachment 536115

What a great advert! “Buy this thing that comes off the thing you stick it to and will stick to the floor for as much as 2 weeks, £50.”

£10 more and she could have got herself a Casio

 

[Ellabella]

She deep cleans her kitchen "12 times a day". Yet doesn't take antibac on a train, during a global pandemic? Right Jack, that makes sense.

 

[PoorPatrol]

You can get a decent amount even for a second hand Belfast sink. I'm now imagining Jack's grandpa as involved in some low-level OCG, using sinks as currency.

Babes, lay off the Line of Duty

 

[Veronicaaa]

Babes, lay off the Line of Duty

NEVERRRRRR!

 

[Eurgh]

He's quoting restaurant parlance, though! (Can confirm, doing 'duck all' is bona fide restaurant parlance).

I love it when @MancBee swears! You know it’s very serious indeed!