Jack Monroe #117 Exit through the grift slop

Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
I'm reading through the article again and whilst Jack doesn't specify that every ingredient is the cheapest possible I think it's very much implied. I think The Express are breaking ASA rule 2.1 - marketing communications must be obviously identifiable as such and 2.4 - marketers and publishers must make clear that advertorials are marketing communications; for example, by heading them "advertisement feature".

PS. Yes, I am VERY fun at parties
 
Reactions: 83
Now that she's knitting a square for each sober day, how long before she gets bored of the tediousness of having to join them, and blames Cooper for running off with her stash?
I give it three days max.

Why the hell Jack would decide to make this grand statement of sobriety some seven hundred days in is crazy enough (yes, I know she said she relapsed a while ago ) but there’s no way this crazy ADHD maverick will have the self discipline to knit a square every single day.

Still, it’s a GREAT way to bring the conversation back to her 200 units a week days, isn’t it? She hasn’t talked about alcoholism for ages...
 
Reactions: 34
THAT MAN is currently on Ch4 doing “Keep cooking at Xmas”. I swear he just made reference to a ‘standard’ turkey. Shade?
 
Reactions: 21
Can @MancBee or anyone else with the paper please upload full page photos if possible? I'm putting together a complaint to the Advertising Standards Authority.
My last effort was awful, let's try again.

Front cover

Page 2 and 3. All about Jack.

Page 3 and 4. The meal plan.

Shopping list and final part of menus.
 
Last edited:
Reactions: 28




For full size versions click here:

 
Last edited:
Reactions: 27
I know I said I hoped glass-blowing or basket-weaving Jack would appear but now that knitting Jack is here I regret saying anything.

That article had me snorting like one of the unfortunate pigs that became entombed in cheap bacon and turned into charcoal briquettes in the oven as a sacrifice to the Dark Slop Lord. Absolutely obscene display of Christmas-ruining incompetence. Our finest satirists couldn't possibly have written anything better than that introductory origin story spiel. Also if you're going to keep hoarding mushrooms, why not use them to make mushroom gravy so the poor vegan at your dinner table doesn't have to choke down a weird sloppy yet dry as fuck mandarin bread loaf?

Actually, on the subject of that 'packed with protein' stuffing roast: if it's split between six, that's about 6g protein per serving. For reference, the average sedentary woman requires about 46g of protein per day. If you're doing pescatarian bodybuilding, it's closer to 100g. A fine example of her not having a clue about macronutrients. Or micronutrients. Any kind of nutrients, really.
 
Reactions: 53
Why?
Prawns die.
I cry.
Why?
Omg this has ended me.

Also this whole article is ridiculous. I wonder how much any adults in her life (father?) may have reveled in a “gifted” diagnosis? Her grandiosity is embarrassing.

In parenting circles you definitely have some parents who go on and on about how gifted their kids are (newsflash, they never actually are—it’s a fuel for the parent’s ego).

Also—she can’t properly cook and complicates everything!

And furthermore you’re telling me her incredibly sweet and generous mother wouldn’t have helped her hungry child. Absolute fucking bullshit. There are some people who can’t ask help from parents—I don’t believe for a second that was the case here.

Urggggghhh!
 
Reactions: 39
Quoting my own post to say that I was not lecturing you, @NoseyParkour , I hope it did not come across that way. Just a shouty, rambling, angry Scamsandwich.
Not necessary to ever tell a Frau something they could not figure out for themselves.

she does not have to explain she is no Alpha.
 
Reactions: 13
To be fair I thought it was some sort of horseshoe.
A nod to her Traveller heritage or whatever she claims she is today.

ETA.. But now she is with The Express, that'll be sanitised from her timelines.
Babe, same x
And whatever it is, it is so bloody tacky.
 
Reactions: 10
Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.