Men have been getting away with this for centuries.
At this stage, I don't know is it more common in Ireland, or is it just everywhere.
It's actually so exhausting to be a woman/a minority group.
You have to constantly watch every situation in case someone who opposes you wants to have a go.
I watched it's a sin recently, and I felt so sad, and exhausted after it, because people were so horrible, and although so much has changed in the last 30 years, at the same time, not much has changed at all
I think it's everywhere to be honest, some places are even worse than here. There seems to be a shift recently, at least as far as I can see. More women than ever are speaking up, and I feel like more of us are supporting and believing one another too. We're far more educated now on consent and I hope because of this our generation will be able to raise little boys who wouldn't dream of crossing those lines, and little girls that recognise and understand what grooming is and are safe in the knowledge that if they came to us they would be believed wholeheartedly without a shadow of a doubt. That's what the posters here need to remember when they default to questioning the victim, your daughters and sons are listening to you, just like I was listening to my parents and knew by how they reacted to other victims stories that I was never ever going to tell them what happened to me. We can all play a part in correcting rape culture so our children grow up in a safer world, and that's where we start. We start with ourselves, addressing where "boys will be boys" and "she was asking for it" comes from. Teach children about consent from day one, no child should be forced to kiss/hug anyone they don't want to, even granny Mary. No means no, every single time. We have a lot of work to undo and everyone of us has a part to play. I hope this thread has been eye opening for some, we have nothing to gain by sharing our stories anonymously like this, none of us are out to ruin lives, this is the true reality of where we're at as a country, and I hope for others it has been even a tiny bit healing, it's the first time I've shared a bit of my story and I really do feel supported and believed, that means so much to survivors. Let's keep chipping away at society's attitudes until eventually society catches up and has zero tolerance for abusers.
No more of this. Think about what you're asking for when you look for proof. Rape hardly ever looks like being dragged down a lane kicking and screaming, with CCTV evidence and witnesses. Far more often than not we know our abusers, we let them in and we blame ourselves enough for this without hearing things like "why did she keep going back?! She must have liked it!" Rapists are master manipulators and they target those who are too vulnerable to stop them. A child cannot consent under any circumstances, no matter what she was wearing, how much she drank or how willingly she met up with her rapist. If a fully grown man is lurking around a child he's a sicko and that's the end of it. Watch out for how the media reports on these crimes, we often read "man has sex with underage girl" nope. It should read "man rapes child" because the "underage girl" is a child and can't consent to sex. We often read "man found with child pornography" child pornography doesn't exist, image based sexual abuse of a child is what they're referring to, pornography implies a level of consent which is obviously not possible. These are just some of the ways in which society normailses rape and rape culture. Call it out and correct it. ZERO TOLERANCE!
Jen said "no, the thing we were talking about this morning, not the thing we were talking about last night" 
