Cleaning with Mario #63 Padded cell by Dan-Yell

[Under_The_Influencer]

Oan his wee shell chair!

 

[hopethishelpsallthebest]

Good morning ma lovelies **super fast mop kick**
How excited I am tae be going on a wee wedding jurney, with youse aw. (After the Herringbone fitting of course) we've been oan so many jurneys of late, I'm starting tae feel car sick, so aye. I can no longer give sympathy to wee Deek, if he's pushing Marion for a wedding, then klarna oan his arse.

 

[Blanche Hunt]

Rayn’s Log

“Day 1825 in captivity. The beaky cunt has now displayed feather dusters aroon the bedroom. He’s a prick. Ah often sit and look oot the windae of this utter shitehole and think how did ah end up in the arsehole of hell. Ah could huv been ah rich cat in Bearsden or a hipster cat in Finnieston but this is the paw Ave been dealt wae. As for ma escape plans, the beaky cunts washing machine is getting replaced so am gawn tae hide in the auld drum when it’s been taken away and as soon as am oot this building am aff. Ave used Beakys new laptop tae Google the address ah the local cat rescue so it’s just Ah case ah waiting patiently and then we move, literally.”

 

[GiftedNotFree]

Screeeeeaaam

 

[hopethishelpsallthebest]

Well good morning ma lovelies and happy Easter tae youse aw. May your wee purses be empty the morrow, so aye. I'm absolootley not arsed with people setting their Easter dining tables, I'm not arsed at aw. I'm fine, absolootley fine. So aye, had myself a wee chrome book for Easter, for all ma wurkey bets, so aye.

 

[laynelo_]

Ffs El shartio card has got to make it onto the next photoshopped picture.

I am a nasty troll.

 

[Popper]

Easter is fur kids. Says the creepy wee man who has a gold bell in a box which says “I believe” oan it and and Xmas Eve box at Christmas. So aye.

 

[Caw1982]

Everytime I pop on this thread I kick myself that I don't keep up. It's pure gold.
Jesus christ that bedroom has just given me a static shock and the willy nilly, random quilts on that chipboard headboard are affecting me far more than it should.
Anyway morning all!!!

 

[Blanche Hunt]

The different sizes oh panels oan the heidboard
The fire damaged wallpaper
The lamps oan the heidboard that don’t go wae the big light
The cheap lightbulbs
The mismatched furniture
The general clutter
The mismatched pampas aw ower the gaff
The mix ah gold and silver
Aw the fucking cabling everywhere
The shelf right next tae the telly
The shite oan tap Ah the wardrobes
The shite voile curtains
The view ah Beruit oot the window
The lazy cunt no even gieing the bedding an iron

But aye it’s exactly like a posh hotel.

 

[hopethishelpsallthebest]

Lovelies, I need a wee holiday jurney! We'd be going through a thread a day! So aye!

 

[TooFarScone]

Just a lil pic dump so I can delete them off ma phone ma lovelies. If ya know ya know! Spine bright tonsa love

 

[LennyBriscoe]

A genuinely look forward to coming on and seeing there’s been stuff wrote on this thread cos a just Ken am gonna be chuckling away Ma lovelies. I’m lonely. I don’t have friends or family only people I see is my husband and my son who is just all for my husband and people at my work but even then I’m still new in my job so I’m more or less on my own! Coming on here having people too have a laugh with, goss about oor Marion honestly gives me something to look forward too so all eh youse with class patter, give yourself a pat on the back cos you just don’t realise whilst oor Marion fizzles at us tattlers you’re helping another tattler lift their spirits. Anyway, enuff eh this birthday caird pish, we thinking Deeks in the boozer getting absolutely hammered whilst Marion’s aw cosy at hame tapping like fuck on that iPhone asking who deeks with when he’s coming home what he’s doing how much he’s drank etc?

Never feel lonely, you’re amongst friends here. Unexpected friends, who have been thrust together by one man. A man to whom English is not the first language. A man who ruins a song just by playing it. A man who has three hairs and buys a Dyson hairdryer. We are a community united in a bid to understand what the hell is going on.

Tattie hearts to ya ma lovely, tonsalove

 

[Curtaintwitcher45]

Lovelies! The new laptop has arrived with anticipation to show off and Moira has already started her very very important work. She’s going to be all tuckered out after the full time working week of 6 hours and so forth not to mention the extra very very important admin work that doesn’t exist but we plod on!

 

[Shrekssister]

Well ma lovelies the day I went on a jurnay of my own tae Mario's very own local small business braehead. Clutched my beak to high heaven when I spotted this sign on a stall there.

 

[Blanche Hunt]

Sign me up tae these lessons anaw Marion, yer looking braw hen

 

[ThreeSteaksPam]

Oh bless wee 2016 Deek. Just happy to watch the TV and see the trains going by. He must look at the life he’s ended up with now and want to cut his own thumbs off for ever DMing that fucking nose with a body attached.

 

[nosy-nora]

A genuinely look forward to coming on and seeing there’s been stuff wrote on this thread cos a just Ken am gonna be chuckling away Ma lovelies. I’m lonely. I don’t have friends or family only people I see is my husband and my son who is just all for my husband and people at my work but even then I’m still new in my job so I’m more or less on my own! Coming on here having people too have a laugh with, goss about oor Marion honestly gives me something to look forward too so all eh youse with class patter, give yourself a pat on the back cos you just don’t realise whilst oor Marion fizzles at us tattlers you’re helping another tattler lift their spirits. Anyway, enuff eh this birthday caird pish, we thinking Deeks in the boozer getting absolutely hammered whilst Marion’s aw cosy at hame tapping like fuck on that iPhone asking who deeks with when he’s coming home what he’s doing how much he’s drank etc?

 

[Babybail93]

Marion - surprised at people overspend and buy into a commercialised holiday we celebrate.
Also Marion - spent £3k on Candy Cane Lame for a commercialised holiday we celebrate.
He’s no right. Also the sight of him possibly unclothed in the padded cell bed is enough to make me bring up all my Easter eggs this early of a morning!

Don’t forget, this is the cunt who spent a Grand on that well known celebration, “Autumn”.

 

[Keera]

I live in a flat (I may not have a front and back door but I do pay fuhl rent in central london so smell the wealth) and my upstairs neighbour is stomping around - my fiancé just turned and said “wonder if he’s upstairs mop kicking the arse out of Tuesday” this thread is the most influential thing about maz

 

[paperbackwriter89]

I’d be HERE fae the holiday jurnee.
Criss & joos fae the plane, new kids tracksuits fae the airport, matching his & his luggage full of wax melts. Cutted grapes and motivational yoghurt from the breakfast buffet every morning, a quick walk round the tat shops supporting the foreign small businesses, then back to the hotel awww cosy at 6pm fae an evening on the laptops and an early night.
Then months of ‘Take me back’ when they return to Paisley Towers