New thread title?βwith this new day of dawnβ .....wtf
New thread title?βwith this new day of dawnβ .....wtf
I actually canβt believe the ignorance of the people on here sometimes. Only a moron wouldnβt know that the phrase is actually βwith this new dayn of dawnβ as pronounced correctly by Mrs Malaprop himself, Mario I think he actually meant βin this day and ageβ but the rant that day was and that wee gem was one of many. Aw, come back with your tri-hourly daily rants please, Mario, all is forgiven Show us your bespoke dinners, your pure luchzury new cushions and remind us again that you pie fahl rent And so forth...New thread title?
I think this might win TattleMelv is harshing my buzz. The funky gibbon doesn't work for silent pictorial stories.
Instead I am invoking the legendary David Attenborough's dulcet tones and applying my own narrative.
The lesser spotted Melvin is indeed a rare species found only in a small territory in the west coast of Scotland. Notoriously often of poor general health, this unremarkable creature retreats to its hole whenever possible venturing out only when work and foraging for food and tat is strictly necessary. Parasitic in nature, the Melvin places a huge strain on local economies, environment and mating partner and unlike other rare species, nobody is particularly interested in conservation protections.
Identifiable by its uniquely hexagonal shaped head, sparsely covered in hair, it should always be approached with caution when outside of its safe place. Easily spooked and given to dramatics, it will lash out at perceived danger by breaking out its natural defences which include, but are not limited too, wild finger gesticulations, head wobbling and furious lip synching. It avidly avoids foods of nutritional value preferring instead anything beige or salt n vinegar flavoured and is wildly attracted to strong perfumed or chemical scents and anything shiny. Should you happen upon the Melvin unexpectedly and walking away in the opposite direction is untenable, it is recommended that you feign admiration, ask it nicely for a selfie or give it something (anything really) for free before slowly but determinedly backing away.
A more concentrated study of this creature was considered before being rejected as not remotely interesting enough.
and so forth.
Perhaps she's got a poorly foof, caught it off someone... *glares at faithless trollop kikini*I am worried about my queen of hearts and the person I tried to thieve the knocker chair of dreams for, @cleaningupthecrap She has vanished and I'm worried oor Melvin has kidnapped her and has her in his pit of despair breathing his "collonicvirum" all over her
I feel it is a jurneee we could all get behindComing soon to a forum near you...
Cleaningupthecrap #1 The Range Jurneee
I think I have a crush on youJust for you @cleaningupthecrap - hope it gives your poorly wee fooof a morale boost
All together now in your best David Attenborough impressions:
Entering the unfamiliar territory of the tat emporium of dreams, the next 30 minutes will prove both crucial and perilous for our intrepid little 'gram cub and her credit card.
Uninitiated in the ritual of "the haul", instincts take over as she wisely selects the be-wheeled basket and sets off on her journey around the store gathering up items that she did not come in for, does not need but which must give her the most bang for her buck. The basket gives some much needed camouflage as she negotiates her way down aisles already over-populated with more experienced insta wannabes who will not welcome this newbie in her quest for 500 followers.
With phone in hand and adrenalin surging, she makes a run for it down the hurricane lamp and candlestick aisle, selecting the cheapest bougie items from the shelves before emerging into the safer waters of the cardboard aisle. No insta stars here, she has made it to temporary but relative safety.
Join us next week to find out if she used a fun filter on her footage and brought her own bags for life as she makes that final push towards the tills and insta glory.
I sent @cleaningupthecrap the Cliff/Mario picture... I am not surprised at the flap actionPerhaps she's got a poorly foof, caught it off someone... *glares at faithless trollop kikini*
I will have my revenge, Iβm still confused what to do with myself every time I look at it!I sent @cleaningupthecrap the Cliff/Mario picture... I am not surprised at the flap action
STRUM YOURSELF TO ECSTASY!!!1111!1!1!!11!!!1I will have my revenge, Iβm still confused what to do with myself every time I look at it!
No you're not missy.I will have my revenge, Iβm still confused what to do with myself every time I look at it!
Oh, that was supposed to be Cliff.No you're not missy.