I thought I'd watch Ryno's Live from January 29th and he seems to be going through a really tough time and I do feel sorry for him. It appears he has some serious mental health issues & maybe deserves some slack.
Here are a few quotes from the first 17 minutes of his one hour fifteen minute chat to camera. It was a gabbling stream of consciousness, I’ve removed a lot of the gabbling but you get the gist. I didn't watch the rest.
“I am never going to find peace…some days I feel like I am drowning.”
“I am very bad about finding worth in myself.”
“I don’t know what to do & I don’t want to talk bluntly and blatantly about it but I’m having a really tough time right now, I am going to make some changes in my life that are going to be some of the most difficult I have ever made and one I’m going to be seeking therapy, I feel like I’m at an age where like if you say something it should be ‘do as I say and as I do’ not ‘do as I say not as I do’, that BS is out the window that is parent maybe talking to a child or something like that but I am done with that man, I’m done with it, I’m done with carrying other people’s baggage, I am so exhausted by it, I don’t want to be a part of that I don’t.. I’m better than that I DESERVE to be loved for the person that I AM (slams fist on table).
I feel like I have rage boiling inside of me some days and I am just so exhausted by people gaslighting me and thinking there’s something wrong with me.. I am so tired, I think I’m just having this realization right now about how I’ve been gaslit for so long..”
“…I just…man I’ve hyper-focused on like these things where I thought it’s me and I’m like it’s not me.. it’s the same thing that happened with work, it’s not like this anymore so this is me speaking about before but it was just like I feel like you if you just give, if you open yourself up to give to people that are only takers they will take every piece of you so I shouldn’t say that’s related to work but I felt like that with a prior boss I’ve had and I’ve felt like that in relationships that I’ve had and I’m examining both relationships both in love and platonic…
I’m not doing well. I should be happy and grateful but I hate this place so much where I live and there’s no solution and this is the hardest part.. therapy can’t solve me not making enough money. I am just so overwhelmed. I am on a precipice of feeling like I am about ready to finally start asking for what I feel like I deserve or what I want and that’s on me for not being vocal. Work isn’t easy, work is difficult and this is part of it, nothing is sadder in life than when you put your faith into something and that rug is yanked out from under you..”
I think he needs to resign and move across the country. A complete change.