The Chateau Diaries #170 Lately, oatmeal is more interesting than The Chateau Diaries!

[ComtesseRose]

Congratulations @Spoilt Victorian Child & @Tea with lemon for thread title and nominations.

Most Liked Posts from the previous thread:




T Rex
VIP Member
Yesterday at 5:05 AM

• #462

Hey baes, thank you all for the laughs- they are much needed! I'll be off the Tattleverse for a few days. I literally came out of a board of director's meeting, and my phone blew up. A friend and neighbour of mine passed away this evening, He had COVID last summer, nearly died from it, but his lungs were compromised and he caught Rona again a month ago (despite being vaxxed and double boostered- stated he was right as rain when we saw him this week.) He was feeling off on Friday, went to the hospital and his wife and daughter returned from Seattle on Sunday night. He called me on Sunday to ask if I could watch their daughter on Monday while his wife went to the hospital. He downplayed his symptoms- had to be intubated on Monday due to pneumonia, and the doctors were planning to perform surgery tomorrow for tear in his heart. They put him in dialysis today, as his kidneys stopped working, and just when everything seemed okay, his body quit working. @mrsp67, it was Len, the owner of Pier One Yacht Sales. He was a good guy, and seriously it is a sad day in our community. I know it is off-topic, but please send prayers to his family.

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Clara Burnett
VIP Member
Tuesday at 8:24 AM

• #105

I have heard many complaints from people I know in the area about the internet playing up over the last few months, so Stephanie Jarvis is not lying about that, but she's also not telling the truth: she herself is at the root of the problem, being the major consumer of 4g in the area and their abuse of it has caused the antenna they connect through to become oversaturated in turn causing a lot of local people to be without a working internet connection. The repair apparently takes a lot of time.

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KiKiGee
VIP Member
Monday at 10:47 PM

• #4

Charlie B
20 minutes ago
For goodness sake, get a grip Stephanie. It will be back next year. I have lost patience with this emotional hysteria.

REPLY

Luke Hartman
13 minutes ago
Don’t watch then. Seems like you are the one having emotional hysteria.

REPLY

Charlie B
4 minutes ago
@Luke Hartman not at all, I am perfectly calm, but I certainly won't be watching any more

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Beachgirl
Chatty Member
Yesterday at 6:10 PM

• #647

I had to go out this morning and on my way home I drove through a beautiful village I always take for granted. I think the village and church, but not the pub have been used in Midsomer Murders and a couple of other crime shows.
I decided to stop and take a photo for all tattlers who have never been to the UK. The pub looked so inviting that I did something I’ve not done for many years and then only when I was walking my dog, I went into the pub on my own and had lunch in the garden.. Everyone was so friendly and I ended up talking to some regulars. But then I do talk to anyone and everyone.
The tree behind the church gate is a yew tree planted in 1655.

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Lovely village.


Clara Burnett
VIP Member
Tuesday at 8:53 AM

• #107

Kalessi said:
They were making a point to show how brown everything is. I think they are about to let the patrons in on the fact that the Belgian souced garden is dead. Isn’t there a water shortage and restrictions going on there?

There certainly is, see here : http://propluvia.developpement-durable.gouv.fr/propluvia/faces/index.jsp
Stephanie Jarvis' local area is in crisis due to water shortage and drought, colored red on the map.
This means: A ban on any non-priority use, including agricultural purposes. Water may only be used for essential reasons – health, civil security, drinking and sanitation. Farmers are forbidden to irrigate their crops with sprinkler systems and sports fields and gold courses can only be watered if they are being used for national or international level competition. Public swimming pools can only be refilled with the express permission of local health authorities and private swimming pools cannot be refilled. Private households can only use water for essential reasons such as drinking, cooking or washing.

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Remember to check the wiki
Happy Tattling.

 

[Iolair]

TVM for creating the new thread ComtesseRose.

I'm liking the thread title! Congrats to Spoilt Victorian Child and Tea with Lemon.

Any guesses on numbers for the visiting Patrons Day?

 

[Just Grift Wood]

Love the new thread name and one true to thing to come out of Lie Lie Land.

 

[Mme Flog]

@Jules100 said, "Or I might have bought it at a local store called Our Boathouse, I can’t remember."

I can't quote it but you made me laugh out loud

 

[Beachgirl]

After learning all about Aubergines @KyBourbon and Pineapples @Jules100 I’m just checking to make sure that Artichokes are just vegetables and have no other meanings as I have bought Artichoke bookends.
I never know with you lot these days.

 

[KyBourbon]

@ComtesseRose thank you for setting up the new thread, and perfect title name @Spoilt Victorian Child and @Tea with lemon !

Also, my condolences to @T Rex and @Le Comte de Monte Cristo on your loss.

 

[graciemckitten]

Fanny is lying, again, in the Patreon video about heating plans, in order to buy herself several more months of grifting income without being questioned about her other lack of projects while she blows more and more money shopping and vacationing. Expect more wide mouth open videos with Fanny sadly and manically videoing her made up reasons for delays and excuses for no heating while frantically collecting money for the non existent heating plans. While clutching or wearing her latest hot water bottle strapped to her body and filming her breath in the air in the cold damp Dump.

 

[JackSpratt]

I'm behind on the chat. If she does go for the Gaz option (more digging work to install the tank and the pipework to the building). Guessing the boiler will be a French one. No good bringing in one from the UK as Qualigaz will not pass it at all. She'll need a French registered fitter to make the final connections to the gas tank so as it can be signed off, so no cutting corners there. Even if she goes the pellet route there will still be all the upheaval of installing the new heating system as there will if it's gas. What's the betting then.

 

[Jules100]

Fanny is lying, again, in the Patreon video about heating plans, in order to buy herself several more months of grifting income without being questioned about her other lack of projects while she blows more and more money shopping and vacationing. Expect more wide mouth open videos with Fanny sadly and manically videoing her made up reasons for delays and excuses for no heating while frantically collecting money for the non existent heating plans. While clutching or wearing her latest hot water bottle strapped to her body and filming her breath in the air in the cold damp Dump.

Remember, a viewer on an up and coming YouTube channel left a comment that she actually called the heating guy’s company & spoke to him about the chateau & he said he wasn’t able to install a pellet burner for her situation, then a tartlet (maybe @JackSpratt?) mentioned her husband in the biz agreed a pellet burner wouldn’t be a good fit for the chateau? That was back in the beginning of July.

 

[JP in SC]

Greetings Tattlers! Announcing our international CHANGE THE LYRICS contest (so we get over pineapple and oatmeal & get our creative juices flowing while Fanny Figures out her next set of diversions which she calls Chateau Diaries).
In an earlier post, one of our Tattlers started to re-write the opening of Beauty & The Beast theme song, but only got through the first opening refrain. I recommend you all take your turn at this. If you intend to sing along, please gargle with vodka (or liquor of choice) and in the case of Jules 100, a Miller Lite. So here we go, to the tune of MY FAVORITE THINGS (you all should know this song) from The Sound of Music.

HAIR DYE ON PHI PHI & WHISKERS LIKE PUBIES
DULL COPPER KETTLES & WARM WATER BOTTLES
GIFTS FROM THE GRANNIES & SCREECHING TO SING
THESE ARE A FEW OF STEPH’S FAVORITE THINGS

CREAM COLORED PULL-UP & FANCY FAUX BROACHES
NO DOORBELLS, NO TAXES & CRAP STUFFED IN ATTICS
WILD PEACOCKS POOPING & VERSAILLES FLINGS
THERE ARE A FEW OF STEPH’S FAVORITE THINGS

STEPH IN WHITE DRESSES WITH BOOBS PUSHED UP NECK HIGH
BOTOX & BLACK ROOTS & FAST BLINKING LASHES
FREEZING COLD WINTERS WHERE SHE TAKES VACAY
THESE ARE A FEW OF STEPH’S FAVORITE THINGS

WHEN TAT CRIES
WHEN NUTTI BITES
WHEN LAUGHTER FAILS
STEPH SIMPLY COMES UP WITH HER FAVORITE LIES
AND THEN SHE JUST GOES AWAY

RAINDROPS THROUGH ROOFTOPS & ROTTING OF BEAMS
AMAURY SANS SHIRT & MUMMIE WHO SCREAMS
DOORS THAT ARE HIDDEN &. DAN’S NOT AROUND
PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH STEPH’S COLLECTION OF CROWNS

PERCY IS SMILING AT STEPH’S DADDY’S PORN PRINTS
PHI PHI IS STIL ON HIS NAIL PAINTING STINT
WALLPAPER PEELING, BATS FLYING BELOW
THESE ARE THE THINGS STEPH DOESN’T WANT TATTLERS TO SHOW

GERRY IN PLAID AS STEPH WEEEEE’S & IS GLAD
#4 SCOOPED BY A GUEST, OH THAT IS QUITE BAD
DRUGS & COCKTAILS AS THE CHAPEL DOES FALL
STEPH DOESN’T WANT THE LAKE AND FACADES FINISHED AT ALL

WHEN THE MONEY‘S GONE
WHEN THE PATRONS SHY
WHEN STEPH IS FEELING BLUE
SHE’LL SIMPLY REMEMBER THAT SHE NEEDS TO SHOP
AND THEN SHE WON’T FEEL SO BAD


Now if some tech savvy Tattler could pull the video clip of the song, super impose the faces of the LaLande characters onto the cast from the Sound of Music, and record a voice over with the above lyrics - then we’d have ourselves a little masterpiece.

 

[graciemckitten]

IMHO, I think that the gruesome twosome, Fanny and the Douche Lord, are going to the same area as the Larkin family and will just meet up with them for a 2 hour lunch to discuss the Shittoo situation and that phi phi will try to make up with Nic over the Christmas fight.

I think Fanny is doing this to try to keep Nic from selling his portion of the Dump and escaping Fannys clutches. I do not in any way think they are together at the same place doing things together for a week and that the Larkin family pines for alone time with Stephanmememe and the porcelain fondler.

I believe that Jarvis is attempting to do some emergency damage control with the Larkins in order to keep them from fleeing the Dump, literally and financially. Fanny would never want to lose control of Nic Larkin, her partner in crime for years, when she intends for him to grow old with her and live with him when she is elderly.

 

[JackSpratt]

Remember, a viewer on an up and coming YouTube channel left a comment that she actually called the heating guy’s company & spoke to him about the chateau & he said he wasn’t able to install a pellet burner for her situation, then a tartlet (maybe @JackSpratt?) mentioned her husband in the biz agreed a pellet burner wouldn’t be a good fit for the chateau? That was back in the beginning of July.

Probably me. It seems to be a bit swings and roundabouts as to what is doable or not. For the pellets she'd have to have quite a large hopper for the pellets (the different combinations or what you can have and what it can do vary a lot) which would have to be refilled. The system is a programmed as to when it goes on or off. He's already put in a gaz system for one Chateau but recently he's been to another Chateau, a bit smaller in size and was advised that Gaz would not be a good idea but a pellet system would. Either way whatever is decided in the end is going to be a big job and best of luck whoever has got to deal with that bunch of loons.

 

[billybudd]

Morning, mealyheads.
@Harpocrates thank you for the recommendation of the YT The Crew Chef channel, very interesting. Interested to see how small the kitchen was on one of her "yachts" and how huge on the next one, complete with more dry storage than I have at my house.
I can't see that Marie has the chops or the energy to cook even for the crew who are hard-working and cosmopolitan young people.
Steamed buns? Poke bowl platter? Banh mih? Bunny chow? Protein-source vegetarian dish for every meal, in addition to the meat one? And like three composed salads? Three meals a day, muffins and some bread baked on board (when she had a sous chef)? Fruit? Shopping in foreign currencies and supermarkets? All on a strict and unfuckable up budget? I think she said low end was €17 a person per day.
And then Friday, you do your three Friday meals, six cooked/prepped-in-advance weekend meals so you can have your days off, and clean the vast kitchen yourself.
Not clear how often she gets help with the dishwashing, either.
Then she stands on her hands in the pantry and skateboards to the supermercado.
That's a lot of energy, a wide range of cuisines, and blitz-fast skills.
And, as Nina mentions, she spends all her time indoors, below decks. And alone in the later vlogs.
I don't see Marie or anyone without a really positive personality, wide and eclectic food experience, and herculean energy (not supplied by cocaine, the chef's Bolivian marching powder) being able to take this on.

 

[JackSpratt]

Greetings Tattlers! Announcing our international CHANGE THE LYRICS contest (so we get over pineapple and oatmeal & get our creative juices flowing while Fanny Figures out her next set of diversions which she calls Chateau Diaries).
In an earlier post, one of our Tattlers started to re-write the opening of Beauty & The Beast theme song, but only got through the first opening refrain. I recommend you all take your turn at this. If you intend to sing along, please gargle with vodka (or liquor of choice) and in the case of Jules 100, a Miller Lite. So here we go, to the tune of MY FAVORITE THINGS (you all should know this song) from The Sound of Music.

HAIR DYE ON PHI PHI & WHISKERS LIKE PUBIES
DULL COPPER KETTLES & WARM WATER BOTTLES
GIFTS FROM THE GRANNIES & SCREECHING TO SING
THESE ARE A FEW OF STEPH’S FAVORITE THINGS

CREAM COLORED PULL-UP & FANCY FAUX BROACHES
NO DOORBELLS, NO TAXES & CRAP STUFFED IN ATTICS
WILD PEACOCKS POOPING & VERSAILLES FLINGS
THERE ARE A FEW OF STEPH’S FAVORITE THINGS

STEPH IN WHITE DRESSES WITH BOOBS PUSHED UP NECK HIGH
BOTOX & BLACK ROOTS & FAST BLINKING LASHES
FREEZING COLD WINTERS WHERE SHE TAKES VACAY
THESE ARE A FEW OF STEPH’S FAVORITE THINGS

WHEN TAT CRIES
WHEN NUTTI BITES
WHEN LAUGHTER FAILS
STEPH SIMPLY COMES UP WITH HER FAVORITE LIES
AND THEN SHE JUST GOES AWAY

RAINDROPS THROUGH ROOFTOPS & ROTTING OF BEAMS
AMAURY SANS SHIRT & MUMMIE WHO SCREAMS
DOORS THAT ARE HIDDEN &. DAN’S NOT AROUND
PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH STEPH’S COLLECTION OF CROWNS

PERCY IS SMILING AT STEPH’S DADDY’S PORN PRINTS
PHI PHI IS STIL ON HIS NAIL PAINTING STINT
WALLPAPER PEELING, BATS FLYING BELOW
THESE ARE THE THINGS STEPH DOESN’T WANT TATTLERS TO SHOW

GERRY IN PLAID AS STEPH WEEEEE’S & IS GLAD
#4 SCOOPED BY A GUEST, OH THAT IS QUITE BAD
DRUGS & COCKTAILS AS THE CHAPEL DOES FALL
STEPH DOESN’T WANT THE LAKE AND FACADES FINISHED AT ALL

WHEN THE MONEY‘S GONE
WHEN THE PATRONS SHY
WHEN STEPH IS FEELING BLUE
SHE’LL SIMPLY REMEMBER THAT SHE NEEDS TO SHOP
AND THEN SHE WON’T FEEL SO BAD


Now if some tech savvy Tattler could pull the video clip of the song, super impose the faces of the LaLande characters onto the cast from the Sound of Music, and record a voice over with the above lyrics - then we’d have ourselves a little masterpiece.

That's my limit.

 

[NotAChatelaine]

Yesterday's Patreon video and the "secret door". Stephanie appears to have forgotten it's called a jib door - a subject she covered in some detail in the vlog about La Mirande in Avignon (the Hotel that she, her mother and Hanni stayed in September 2020). She could have slotted in a clip from that Sundays at the Chateau vlog: way more interesting and informative than Armoire getting unhinged and SJ becoming chamfered at the edges.

Dan's quite right, the success of the end result is entirely dependent on the wallpaper hanging. Crayons at the ready.

An example of a jib door in properly grand surroundings. Eat your heart out or dream on, Miss Jarvis. One way or t''other, you still won't be creating a facsimile of a palace.

The Mirande vlog is probably the only CD I have atched, actually paid attention to and found genuinely interesting, thanks to the contribution of M. Stein, co-owner of the hotel, and Stephanie's (for the most part) reined in interviewing performance.

 

[Mme Flog]

Getting bored with this now but it is relevant if her indoors is watering her garden without a. care in the world.

Water conflicts multiply in France as drought restrictions extended

Holes torn in jacuzzis and water stolen from tanks and cemeteries as people take issue with certain water usages and limits

www.connexionfrance.com

 

[Princess and the Pea]

IMHO, I think that the gruesome twosome, Fanny and the Douche Lord, are going to the same area as the Larkin family and will just meet up with them for a 2 hour lunch to discuss the Shittoo situation and that phi phi will try to make up with Nic over the Christmas fight.

I think Fanny is doing this to try to keep Nic from selling his portion of the Dump and escaping Fannys clutches. I do not in any way think they are together at the same place doing things together for a week and that the Larkin family pines for alone time with Stephanmememe and the porcelain fondler.

I believe that Jarvis is attempting to do some emergency damage control with the Larkins in order to keep them from fleeing the Dump, literally and financially. Fanny would never want to lose control of Nic Larkin, her partner in crime for years, when she intends for him to grow old with her and live with him when she is elderly.

Of course Fanny & her bf are with Nick & Marie It's a free holiday dahling....Now that Antoine is getting older the last thing he wants to do is spend his holidays in the arse end of nowhere with not even a swimming pool in high summer.

 

[TorontoGWM]

IMHO, I think that the gruesome twosome, Fanny and the Douche Lord, are going to the same area as the Larkin family and will just meet up with them for a 2 hour lunch to discuss the Shittoo situation and that phi phi will try to make up with Nic over the Christmas fight.

I think Fanny is doing this to try to keep Nic from selling his portion of the Dump and escaping Fannys clutches. I do not in any way think they are together at the same place doing things together for a week and that the Larkin family pines for alone time with Stephanmememe and the porcelain fondler.

I believe that Jarvis is attempting to do some emergency damage control with the Larkins in order to keep them from fleeing the Dump, literally and financially. Fanny would never want to lose control of Nic Larkin, her partner in crime for years, when she intends for him to grow old with her and live with him when she is elderly.

Refresh my memory… what happened between the Hedgehog and Baghead at Christmas?

 

[Jules100]

IMHO, I think that the gruesome twosome, Fanny and the Douche Lord, are going to the same area as the Larkin family and will just meet up with them for a 2 hour lunch to discuss the Shittoo situation and that phi phi will try to make up with Nic over the Christmas fight.

I think Fanny is doing this to try to keep Nic from selling his portion of the Dump and escaping Fannys clutches. I do not in any way think they are together at the same place doing things together for a week and that the Larkin family pines for alone time with Stephanmememe and the porcelain fondler.

I believe that Jarvis is attempting to do some emergency damage control with the Larkins in order to keep them from fleeing the Dump, literally and financially. Fanny would never want to lose control of Nic Larkin, her partner in crime for years, when she intends for him to grow old with her and live with him when she is elderly.

I think it’s the opposite. It’s a weird goodbye vacation. I believe Nic has sold his part of the chateau & in order to smooth things over with hysterical Stephanie, planned a trip together.

 

[Madame de Pompanddoodoo]

Getting bored with this now but it is relevant if her indoors is watering her garden without a. care in the world.

Water conflicts multiply in France as drought restrictions extended

Holes torn in jacuzzis and water stolen from tanks and cemeteries as people take issue with certain water usages and limits

www.connexionfrance.com

I agree but there has been no video evidence of that happening recently. Earlier in the Summer when there were water restrictions in the Indre district we saw the Jardin de Anglaise was still being watered, but for the last few weeks although she has pranced around the garden many times in her night clothes there have been no scenes of watering. Not saying they are not but without proof there is nothing that can be done. The only way to be sure is for someone who lives in the locality to go and check on them. Feel like a jaunt?