Why doesn’t she follow her own advice?????
“'A good, arched brow – thicker than Edith Piaf's, thinner than Kate Middleton's – works better than Botox'”
What a difference nine years makes. She looked so much better before. What on earth has happened to her? She looks like a totally different person now!
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I mean, she's no minger now but just imagine having this as your starting point and 'tweaking' the features out of it. This is such an interesting, attractive face.
I still don't think I'm jealous, but I do slightly despair at how someone who wasn't born looking like an uncooked Christmas ham has chosen to take a great face and morph into Yet Another Instagram Face. Meanwhile, Hermione Hamhock over here is desperately trying to contour some definition into her face with her trotters and would happily welcome a natural mole onboard, if it helped to break up the great expanse of pork cheek. I do feel a bit bad if she's succumbed to pressure, but my sympathy is limited given the role that influencers and beauty journalists play in perpetuating these ideals of 'what women should look like this year'.
PS, I'm not being overly harsh on myself, I really do look like a Gloucestershire Old Spot. Fortunately though I have an exemplary brain and make incredible roast potatoes, so need not rely on my looks to succeed in life / find a boar to settle down with