Mrs Hinch #253 As long as I got me and me, Fleecing my sheep with each two faced scheme

[Javajoe]

Finally coming out of lurk-dom because this bitch acting as though she’s dying because she can’t have her family inside is just too much for me.

I live in Melbourne, Australia. We are currently in one of the longest (and harshest tbh) lockdowns in the world. We have been locked down since March, we aren’t allowed to go more than 5km from home, We can’t have visitors, and until very recently were only allowed to leave the house for a maximum of an hour between 5am-8pm. Absolutely everything is shut with the exception of grocery stores, medical centres, and pharmacies. Since MARCH. We are losing ourgoddamn minds.

I haven’t seen my family since Christmas Day, because prior to lockdown our country was on fire and we couldn’t leave the house due to excessive smoke. So cry me a fucking river, Sophie. And get fucking tested.

 

[Hanni-pops77]

Title suggestion

Sophie Sophie how does your garden grow...Thats a Tesco tomatoe we all know

 

[What's the craic Jack]

Guyyyzz what an honour to get my first thread title I never thought this could happen to little ole me from the small village of Dublin. I would like to thank my fellow pastry trolls for the inspiration and support! Happy Friday tattle bastards...keep singing

 

[Sazz1006]

After seeing Hinch’s tomato success, I thought I’d have an early morning trip in to the garden and look what I found nestling in the bus shelter flower bed!

 

[mgh727]

Thread title suggestion: It’s October that’s a salad tomato from Tesco you twat.

 

[MrsNott]

Soph, considering you do everything Tattle says - lend me 10 grand please hun x

 

[shadyessex33]

Do we think Henry gets his own order from the Chinese?

I’m not sure about the Chinese but I know he gets his own Indian order.

Chicken bhuna
lamb bhuna
prawn bhuna
mushroom rice
bag of chips
keema naan and 9 poppadoms

 

[GossipBug]

Does Fresh 'n' Up Friday annoy anyone else as much as me or am I being completely pedantic. 'n' is usually used in place of "and" so is it Fresh And Up Friday? Which makes no sense. Surely it should be Freshen Up?

 

[Egg parcels]

That fucking tomato

 

[calmyourritas]

Unreleased pic of Vestlife and the potato he dug up earlier from Ron Don’s veg patch

 

[AC55]

How are you all feeling? Well Grinch, let me tell you as you sit in a quiet little restaurant for dinner! I'm on nights all weekend and last night was an incredibly difficult and emotional shift. Tonight there is a family grieving for the baby that they do desperately wanted but despite the best to of our team, we couldn't save him. The whole team were shattered and wrung out. Tonight I have to go to work and despite the sadness of last night, I need to stay positive and focused for the other babies and families I care for. I didn't really sleep very well today and I'm tired. So while you sit there eating dinner, revelling in the attention your ongoing pity party brings you, asking people how they're feeling, stop for just one minute and ask yourself why you're asking that question. You don't give a fuck about how anyone other than you is feeling and as long as you're soaking up the attention you so desperately crave, everything is just fine isn't it?
Just go home. You're pathetic.

 

[shadyessex33]

Jamie or Ma Barker probably stuck it in the patch to placate the stroppy cow.

Are we thinking Mad Ma still comes around on Christmas Eve to eat the mince pie, half a carrot and drink a glass of milk? So Verucca still thinks Santa is real?

 

[GarlicMayo]

I'm getting abit sick of seeing the fucking sliced meat in a bowl every morning tbh. HUN WE GET IT.

 

[Lemongrab]

Never thought I’d say this but I think you’re all being so harsh judging her about that tomato. Who says you can’t get a tomato mid October, I just got this off mine. (Please note: these are not my hands before you nasty little hand trolls start ripping into me)

 

[HinchesSousChef]

I predominantly watch her stories on mute so forgive me if I’ve gotten this wrong but anyone feel like her “cleaning” today is very much begrudgingly being done. Like here you go. Here is the Friday cleaning thing. Sigh.

 

[KMS79]

First of all, I apologise if what I’m about to say is upsetting or triggering for some people, but in the hope that Zoph still does read on here (and I’m sure she does) I want to say this....Hun, your first born “child” does not take a blind bit of notice of you and still likes to take a dump in your raised beds, despite you apparently having him well trained...probably because when he does it you find it funny even though you’re shouting at him to get out..,that creates very mixed signals to a dog so what on Earth makes you think that letting your gorgeous little boy climb under the table to be right in that dogs personal space which he clearly isn’t happy about, is a good idea!? When he has that little boys arm, leg or even face between his jaws and he’s shaking him about like a rag doll and you tell Henry to “Drop it” or shout at him to stop...he won’t and it will be YOUR fault, not Henry’s, not Ronnie’s....YOURS. Maybe you’ll be lucky and Henry will just give a snarl and nip and that will be enough but do you think you’ll ever be able to trust him after that? No. The dog will have to go and Ronnie will probably have a fear of dogs that will last his whole life...all because you wanted content for your Instagram page...just think about that and for Gods sake adjust your priorities. They are NOT brothers, they are human and Dog and both need to be treated with respect.

 

[under the ivy]

Potential next thread title: Fake grows tomatoes she thinks she’s Monty Don, still recycling content with Hen and Ron

 

[easeypeasey]

looks suspiciously like a Tesco special...

View attachment 277608

Yeah pics of the plant or it didn't happen. I'll eat my fucking slippers if she pulled that off a plant. Most tomatoes are done for the season and there's not a chance in hell they've survived to live that big if they've been growing in the open.

She didn't even plant tomatoes in there man!!!! 4000 carrots and that's about it isn't it?

 

[Cthomas491993]

Is it just me that thinks Henry looks like Audrey from Corrie ?? Poor lad needs a hair cut

 

[under the ivy]

Guysss I’ve been secretly following Hinch’s gardening tips of never watering and putting rabbit ornaments in the veg patch and lo and behold! This morning I’ve found this ready to pick. ATV...