LornaLuxe #5 liar, liar acrylic pants on fire

[annabelle_bronstein]

‘Lorna Luxe - For a whole two days, black lives matter, then its straight back to being the mad hatter’

 

[Ohmydays]

“I need to check if they actually like us” Well it’s a bit fucking late now love Johns booked the flights! And no it’s not a tricky one you prat Greece isn’t open to the UK yet and there’s currently a quarantine in place when you get back to UK ( I don’t think she said when she’s planning to but who knows if it will be extended or what might happen in the coming weeks)

Also can someone tell her she looks like a fucking borrower with this bag!

Oh FFS I just watched the rest! SIX suitcases!? Fuck off Lorna.

More talk of Rosé 🥱🥱🥱

Why have I done this to myself!!!

FFFFFSSSS !!!! I’ve just watched
Ok .... here we go
grubby Fukkin hands !
She doesn’t normally wear make up on Mondays ???? Since when ? Today !!!
We’ve Fukkin watched 10 Monday’s of you sat on your arse in your grubby robe slapping it on !!!!
‘She’s not been able to travel and she travels a lot so her life has completely changed recently ‘..!!
WTF ITS NOT JUST BEEN A LOONYLUXELIAR LORNA LOCKDOWN there is a whole world of real people away from your dressing room mirrors !!! And we’ve all been in lockdown having OUR LIVES completely changed !
Of course your glad we bought your beauty boxes it’s lined your Fukkin pockets £££££££££
Don’t get me started on the booking flights .. is the man a total moron !!!!!!!’ He needs something to look forward to ... i
Oh they were inexpensive doesn’t matter if we can’t go ‘ fukkin nob !!! I’m gonna start a #Give @Jasmine back the M&S money ..
6 Fukkin cases !!!!! Seriously you vain ugly witch . ?
As for the ‘friends’ !! Have they not been in touch with them since ????
oh and the Fukkin vacuous conversation between them, the constant drivel re rose wine is purely for us TATTLERS. as was the Zoom filter giggle ‘
But her smug face when he said ..
‘Looking really pretty today’ I Fukkin roared laughing ....

HOW RUDE is she to be still sat on her arse waffling on to the internet when she’s supposed to be in a meeting ... I detest lateness is people but why am I surprised that she doesn’t even care !!!
Vile person ..

I need a drink

rant over ..

 

[AllAboutTheMayhem]

Fuck my tin trumpet.

And Dyson are paying her for this? I’m sorry but it looks terrible. Truly truly awful.

Who the hell would watch that and rush out and buy one ? I’d be more inclined to use my geriatric mother’s Braun Independent off of 1989 ( complete with hissing gas cylinder)

Thread title offering


4 months in a cupboard, wearing a mucky gown,
Trowelled on make up, resembles a clown.

 

[annabelle_bronstein]

Is it premature to get excited about new thread titles?

delayed her 'collection' because black lives matter,
thank god for filters so she doesn't look fatter

 

[Fluffy81]

OR. Getting his teeth whitened !


This Fukkin cracked me up


OMG ... his voice is so creepy ... they’ve def discussed what they are gonna say beforehand ...
oh and the way he talks about his Botox made me wanna vomit !!! Totally agree re cringey ... he sounds like a Smarmy, yes man ,whipping boy doesn’t he find it weird that she’s talking to her phone .... there’s no rapport between them it’s all very stilted ... Oh and the she feels like a single parent cos he’s at work all the time ... what a Fukkin insult to single parents .... FFS grow up !!!

I bet lord johhny boy uses her makeup too .... slathers on the fake luxe tan .... all he needs is a medallion ....

I feel like I need the vomit bucket .... it’s so deceiving how they come across and manufactured.

It’s parhetic. Whilst my company is going through mass redundancy... for hard workers ... she’s there acting like a spoilt diva. I’m getting less and less interested in these apparent ‘ bloggers ... etc’ .... they are all greedy as fucking hell and do not live in the real world. Yes .. I would love to be in a position where I can sit on my ass all day... but the reality is I can’t. She sits there all coy in her dirty bathrobe .. putting on this contrived face, acting like her life is one big murder she wrote escapade ... where is John .. oh he’s lost in my big mansion.

She’s not an influencer. The only influencing she does is to manipulate people to spend there hard earned cash .. so she can obtain more freebies to add to her existing junk in the trunk.

Sorry Lorna .. but it’s wearing thin. Get a real job and get some respect for yourself.

 

[AllAboutTheMayhem]

She didn’t get treatment at the priory! She went for half a morning as a day patient and they said if she wanted to get better she needed to stay for a month. And refused and told John “ if you make me stay the marriage is over” so he got her counselling 2x a week and she did that for a bit and then never went back.


In the podcast thing , she maintains that Instagram has really helped her. Maybe if she wasn’t filtering every picture and showed her true size and face and didn’t lie about her manor then this statement would be more convincing...but there’s not just the eating disorder issue at play. She mentions she grew up on a council estate and was overweight. She obviously feels she has something to prove which might explain the pretence about the flat they live in. It also explains why she is so “impressed” by wealth.
From the information we are presented with John is absolutely her enabler. But they’re evidently both happy with that arrangement so...

 

[Mrs Wilde 7]

Who the fcuk does she think she is? ‘Holding Court’!? It’s a cheap, scratchy, acrylic, fire starting rag, not the cure to Covid babe. No one gives a fig!
Like we are all losing sleep over not having cheap, nasty nappies. Piss off Mrs Bucket!

 

[annabelle_bronstein]

It’s as though she likes them to practically hang out. The way she always pulls one side of her robe further open to expose more of her chest . There’s been the odd occasion her boobs nearly fallen out of the robe . She does need a bra though your right

Argh the engraved robe being pulled ‘ever so’ open drives me MAD
As does:
The constant raking through her manky barnet with her fake claws
The quizzical look she does at the end of every sentence she utters
Ha I need to stop looking at her insta

 

[Ohmydays]

I agree I reckon there's been a major falling out, with companies now looking at the other end of Lockdown there is going to be a huge amount of restructuring including redundancies, he poss could be in the firing line. Spending too much time together with her demanding childish ways.

Something just doesn't add up that he has just disappeared.

I still think it’s because his Botox needs doing and his hair needs dying !!! A wrinkly old grey haired elf is probably Not the OAP Sugar Daddy image she wants on her ‘brand’
Plus she’s such a lazy cow she’d be a dehydrated dried up old husk laying on her dressing room floor if the whipping boy wasn’t there to feed and water her

 

[Nevar3663]

Didn't see anything from rodial used today. Guessing that 'friendship' and the best concealer, powder etc ever have now been relegated

Clearly only used them to push the 'curated' box sales

 

[LadyLockdown]

I’m sorry but her stories today have really rattled my cage !!. Lots of reference to the tattlers thread though . She’s just not addressing BLM , it’s like the elephant in the room she’s pussy footing around the issue .... trying to prove she’s intelligent with her ‘English degree’ then acting as if her minions are thick and just want to watch you tube or listen to Podcasts so she’s again suggesting stuff that she’s found interesting that they can learn from FFS !!! Then back to her and her skin and her hair playing the victim re lack of confidence blah blah blah ..,I find her infuriating today ... the shallow vile person that she is is never far from The
TIP OF THE ICEBERG
hey LoonyLuxeLiar
Here’s probably more that Ive missed but I’m bashing the keypad so Im gonna stop

I unfollowed her yesterday as she just pissed me off monumentally but I had to go back and look cos of what you said and she’s just desperately desperate.
First off; why are ALLLLLLL influencers (not just LLL) with nothing to REALLY say just asking how people are? Could it be their management companies telling them how to respond to the BLM movement?
Second: no it’s not the “age of digital”, sweetheart. It’s the age of narcissism.
Third: In relation to finding “information” to share, Tuesday and Wednesday do not constitute “this week”
Forth: Friends??? I. THINK. NOT.
Fifth: Re her hair - “I feel like a different person” Yeah... but you’re not. ITS A FILTER.
Sixth: Everyone message OAP about LLL’s haïr so she can reply for him to tell us how much better she feels (not to mention feed her own pathetic narcissism).

I could go on but nah. She’s just such a fake at everything.

 

[AllAboutTheMayhem]

I had a weird flashback yesterday. Quite a few years ago now I went to a birthday party - the spoiled son of a “ luxe friend”. The child and mother sat there opening birthday presents in front of all the guests, and were placing some in a pile to the right, and some in a pile to the left. I asked another parent what they were doing - turns out it was a keep /bin pile !
I was horrified on so many levels ... but long story short.. this is how Lorna comes across to me.

 

[Ohmydays]

She’s paying homage to me today !! She’s made her stories about the vile shapeless Sweaty polyester dress !! .
@Its_Me I think she wants to make friends . ? !

where do they hand around in B? I am taking hubby for Father’s Day to our fav spot in Brighton, may have a little stroll around ...
love B by the way, we are only short drive away and it’s my fav town ever

Exact my thoughts!!!
all high street brands ripped it off Dior, so did Lorna. Who tf she thinks she is?Some designer guru? she prob pointed at the fabric she likes and that was it what a fucking moron

I was sat outside in the Lanes and they strolled past ... well she was walking like she’d pissed herself and he was walking like an OAP !! My Fukkin jaw hit the ground ..

 

[it’s not been changed?!]

Hahahahaha she just said “pierce de la resistance” when she meant “piece de resistance” when about to spray that setting spray. Thick as pig shit.

 

[AllAboutTheMayhem]

Talking of mates. I’ve just seen the arse end of google box, ( I’ve never seen it before) and lo and behold it’s her mate that was allegedly in the garden.

Im Guessing they go to the same butcher for their lips?

Where’s Jasmine?

Texting John to get her Kylie picture back.

 

[interestingobserver]

did anyone see her post 'i'm tired of being part of a major historical event'.... open your eyes Lorna- millions are dead and all you're worried about is a hideous dress and fucking Rosé!!! her posting her WhatsApp conversation with OAP confirming the order of Whispering Angel. SO FUCKING BORING.
also side note- OAP has an iPhone 7 what is that all about?

 

[tired&uninspired]

I’ve only just discovered these threads and they are giving me life. So glad I am not the only one that finds this unbearable, repetitive and fake. There’s only so many times I can see ‘ahhh thanks darling’ on every.single.comment like a bot.

 

[Pingping]

That video of them kissing really made me retch, she’s not into him one bit I don’t think, what an absolute silly cow in that hat at someone’s wedding, and who the hell gets their own name tattooed on them, is she really that dense she couldn’t think of anything other than her name ffs Oh and someone asked how often do you wash your hair... obvs Mr luxe to plug her Kingsley shit again, why would anyone ask someone that question ffs, and anyone who watches her must know she does it every day by now as she tells us daily!

 

[Its_Me]

Anyone read this ? Seriously I think it’s instagram breeding these narcissistic selfish vain greedy idiots..
Does this mean More trickery and fakery on their LYING Instablaggers accounts !! ?

You know I was thinking earlier (not that it’s anything new) how much social media, Instagram in particular has changed over the years. I remember circa 2013 It was just people posting crap pics of what they were up to, Holiday pics, reposts of quotes, throwback Thursdays and birthday shout outs. It’s now just a breeding ground for greed and narcissism

 

[Ohmydays]

She thinks she’s Zsa Zsa Gabor with her 6 suitcase bollocks. It’s meant to impress everyone. Lucky old mr luxe taking photos of this vain creature. That’s his idea of a holiday?? Tbh she needs 5 cases of slap to slather on and a case full of acrylic shit.


Jesus I’m on the wine and it’s not even 5pm. I need a safe space. She’s triggered me completely with this last 30383 stories since lunch.
What’s with the guest (Vocal) appearance from Mr Luxe? It’s like some pub circuit comedy duo.. but less funny. You know the type that get booed off.

And her lips look collossal.. she really does see something else when she admires herself in the mirror. She really has come a long way....

Team Luxe do Santorini !!!