Noooooooo, James, noooooooooo
Not another silly twit.
Go and stand in the corner with Nigella and Ian Rankin.
Jack Monroe #64 One hand refreshing Twitter, and the other one playing the piano
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Not another silly twit.
Go and stand in the corner with Nigella and Ian Rankin.
She’s ruined her insta grid theme.
Oops. How long until she realises? 
What, wait, why is she sitting at a chipped formica table, do Cotswold not do nice tables? And can you eat raw greengages?
Just reading her ‘Greengages’ caption ...
Love how she’s gone up in the world - her grandad spread soft white rolls thick with margarine, but she’s going to have hers with fancy butter.
Also, I know she’s attempting to romanticise the meal with descriptions of a ‘chipped Formica table’ in her rented non-bungalow, but the words ‘cheap wet ham’ will never, ever make my mouth water.
Love how she’s gone up in the world - her grandad spread soft white rolls thick with margarine, but she’s going to have hers with fancy butter.
Also, I know she’s attempting to romanticise the meal with descriptions of a ‘chipped Formica table’ in her rented non-bungalow, but the words ‘cheap wet ham’ will never, ever make my mouth water.
Props to the HE institutional frauen taking one for the team with the god-awful radio programme. I'm on a deadline today but happy to listen to more next week, cringe myself inside out, and report back.
She's determined to punish her parents for their wrongdoings, perceived or real, isn't she? I mean, it never happens that really bleeping old fruit trees die and have to be cut down, does it? And has she not considered that perhaps it was so painful for her dad to have to see the tree after his father had passed away that he just needed the reminder gone? God forbid anyone else should have feelings, or pain.
I'm a nail-biter of three decades so I've never actually had nails to know if they get minging (other than acrylics
) and thus I've never actively commented on the detritus under her nails but... that is bleeping foul. No wonder she doesn't seem to have any friends, they all contracted dysentery and snuffed it after eating her food.
She's determined to punish her parents for their wrongdoings, perceived or real, isn't she? I mean, it never happens that really bleeping old fruit trees die and have to be cut down, does it? And has she not considered that perhaps it was so painful for her dad to have to see the tree after his father had passed away that he just needed the reminder gone? God forbid anyone else should have feelings, or pain.
I'm a nail-biter of three decades so I've never actually had nails to know if they get minging (other than acrylics
) and thus I've never actively commented on the detritus under her nails but... that is bleeping foul. No wonder she doesn't seem to have any friends, they all contracted dysentery and snuffed it after eating her food.
Is the posh Englishwoman in the radio play supposed to be her Greek grandmother or her Northern Irish grandmother? 
Is there a show idea that Jack wouldn't accept right now? It seems she will jump on any concept proposed ..... anyone for Thorpe Bay Monkey Tennis?
That *is* her being annoying though. I loved my Grandparents a lot too, but that doesn’t mean I’m allowed to lie at work.
"Cheap wet ham"
She always makes things sound so appetising, doesn't she?
She always makes things sound so appetising, doesn't she?
Greengages and fingernail dirt. Southend.
It would be quite a short show, no? Let's say 2 minutes for this guy to say "tinned veg are healthy", 5 min for Jack to do her standard introduction, then...time for her to make delicious meals?
Shy people hate drawing attention to themselves. Jack-look-at-me-look-at-me-mon-bleeping-roe, shy??
I honestly thought this was your satire of what she might write! This is terrible.
The funniest bits to me were her complaints about a twitter user saying Jack makes it all about herself, and the polician who said her retelling of her story was “boring”.
Of course, Jack ascribes this to society wanting to stamp out the working class, such as herself, and not allow them to tell their stories.
Rather than the fact that she does make it all about herself, and her repetitively going on and on about briefly dipping her toes into poverty is bleeping tedious.
Id never even heard of greengages before. /peasant
I mean, thisSeeing that greengage photo all I can think of is that it has been taken with her tongue
is the caption!
OK... I have waited for Jacquie to say something, somewhere on any social media or indeed acknowledge her mothers messages. She hasn't, maybe shes doing it privately but if Eve is putting it out there on SM her daughter should publicly acknowledge her. Her mum is really rather poorly in hospital.
Do you follow her mum on twitter @help i need some help!?
She manages to crowbar mawkish, self obsessed melodrama into even the most mundane of activities.
duck me, she must be hard work to live with.
Yes, I am not Louisa BTW, or Allegra, or indeed any past fiancees of Jak
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