Jack Monroe #61 Complete, made up, fanciful nuclear-level bollocks

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When she uses the word "snarky" she means us. She said it before when she mentioned her "snarky fan club". Jackie just can't deal with Tattle!
 
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Just watched his video on twitter, how simple and good did that little 5 minute scrambled egg and tomatoe chutney-thing look?! He managed to present it without stuttering, forgetting lines or the actual cooking process, it was even possible to watch it without having to look through my fingertips.

How long until Monroe releases the hounds?
She wouldn't be be able to handle basic scrambled eggs she'd have to jazz it up with Branston pickle and tinned pears or something
 
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So she hates all exercise including running? Yet I read one of her blog posts the other day that said seven year old her was a running fanatic.
Where’s Novak Nail when I need him?
 
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So she hates all exercise including running? Yet I read one of her blog posts the other day that said seven year old her was a running fanatic.
Where’s Novak Nail when I need him?
I think he may have collapsed due to overwork.
 
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She wouldn't be be able to handle basic scrambled eggs she'd have to jazz it up with Branston pickle and tinned pears or something
Am kinda imagining Monroe-esque scrambled eggs is just cooking a massive omelette and then blending the result in a nutribullet.
 
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'Fan club' 😂

Mate I'm on like 10 different threads here.

Your brand of fantastical bollocks isn't special or unique. All the regular posters here have in common is a low bullshit tolerance. It's nothing to do with you Jack.

Now duck off.
 
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So I’ve just grunkaed through the previous thread; had to take a break from JM for the last few days as my bullshit detector was getting an RSI. I am now reminded, in case of any doubt, that she is a PIECE OF WORK. An irritating, manipulative, disingenuous, attention-seeking, self-centred, cold-hearted piece of work at that. I don’t think she really cares about cooking, photography or poetry composition as crafts per se; she doesn’t love art for arts sake. She just wants to be famous, has probably always wanted to be famous, and sees these things as simple levers to pull to get her there. That’s why she never sticks at anything long enough to actually study it and learn it and get good at it. And she never wants to take well meaning advice from anyone.

and that’s why she’s been in a tailspin since L left. Quite apart from the understandable trauma of having a long term relationship end suddenly (and I really feel for her there) I think she realises that her career is going nowhere. She’s less famous and in demand now than she was five years ago. She hasn’t developed her craft and she hasn’t developed as a person so there’s nothing for anyone to work with. I bet she’s burned lots of bridges too. The relationship with L was her last link to the Groucho blue tick set she seems to love, without that she has no network and seemingly nothing in the career pipeline. she claims to work 20 hours a day - so where is the output Jack? Your attention grabbing twitter screeds? That will not help you: all you have left there are a bunch of quite vulnerable followers who need validation and will put up with any nastiness you give them in hopes of getting it, just like the unpopular kids nervously fawning around the high school Mean Girl. and a few blue tickers who occasionally condescend to blow a bit of smoke up your arse because they do that to minor slebs all the time, just to cover themselves.

I don’t know whether RB was her sponsor and I don’t actually think it’s that relevant. What I do know is that she would likely not be able to work with any decent sponsor because they would force her to take stock, look in the mirror and confront the issues within herself that cause her problems. And I don’t think she’s ready for that. To paraphrase a wise man (Bill W): “So we saw that our problems were of our own making; others did not cause them.”

Sometimes I think Jack kind of realises this about herself but she never then goes on to take the next vital step: to CHANGE.

oh yeah and the poetry is shite. Like emo lyrics. I bet she was a fan of Evanescence.

all speculation your honour!! Jack is a paragon of virtue. Now duck off.
 
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Now, you can’t just come in here and tell us she’s a friend of your friends, and not give us any stories ☕
As I said, I didn't ever meet her. I wouldn't call the others my friends (not exactly), but they did have direct contact with her. She wasn't a major topic of conversation, but I did ask what she was like, because I was vaguely fascinated by her. (Even then, I had my own theories.) The gist is that she was/is a manipulative, entitled nutter. Unstable. Mad. Deeply unpleasant unless she wanted something. No one had a good word to say about her. In other words, precisely what we've all surmised for ourselves.

I also think there's another thing here. I can't substantiate this, but I think it may well be true. Someone on another thread asked what her partners found attractive about her. I think I can sum up the process. I've known people like this and I can suss them out pretty easily.

Initially very flirtatious, rapidly turning hotly (and adventurously) sexual. Love-bombing, which is hard to resist. 'Never felt like this before' etc. It's ALL about the Other Party. Life is bliss, for just long enough to have the Other Party fall in love, hard. Cohabitation happens far too quickly, followed by plans for 'Together Forever'. Then there's a slight vulnerability (probably one of her physical issues), making her a little unwell. The Other Party lavishes her with love and care. She bounces back. Then a small meltdown, probably about internet bullying ('It's not fair, you KNOW I only try to help people'). The Other Party leaps to her defence. This pattern continues, slowly at first, then the physical and mental meltdowns pile on thick and fast. The Other Party finds their friends unwilling to hang out with them as a couple and they start making excuses for her, eventually changing their lives to accommodate hers. In time they realise that she is an attention vortex and there is nothing whatsoever in it for them.

She's quite simply a vampire, draining the energy and life out of everyone she encounters. Even us.
 
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I am watching “that man” his food always looks good and he’s easy to watch / follow what he’s doing
 
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As I said, I didn't ever meet her. I wouldn't call the others my friends (not exactly), but they did have direct contact with her. She wasn't a major topic of conversation, but I did ask what she was like, because I was vaguely fascinated by her. (Even then, I had my own theories.) The gist is that she was/is a manipulative, entitled nutter. Unstable. Mad. Deeply unpleasant unless she wanted something. No one had a good word to say about her. In other words, precisely what we've all surmised for ourselves.

I also think there's another thing here. I can't substantiate this, but I think it may well be true. Someone on another thread asked what her partners found attractive about her. I think I can sum up the process. I've known people like this and I can suss them out pretty easily.

Initially very flirtatious, rapidly turning hotly (and adventurously) sexual. Love-bombing, which is hard to resist. 'Never felt like this before' etc. It's ALL about the Other Party. Life is bliss, for just long enough to have the Other Party fall in love, hard. Cohabitation happens far too quickly, followed by plans for 'Together Forever'. Then there's a slight vulnerability (probably one of her physical issues), making her a little unwell. The Other Party lavishes her with love and care. She bounces back. Then a small meltdown, probably about internet bullying ('It's not fair, you KNOW I only try to help people'). The Other Party leaps to her defence. This pattern continues, slowly at first, then the physical and mental meltdowns pile on thick and fast. The Other Party finds their friends unwilling to hang out with them as a couple and they themselves making excuses for her, eventually changing their lives to accommodate hers. In time they realise that she is an attention vortex and there is nothing whatsoever in it for them.

She's quite simply a vampire, draining the energy and life out of everyone she encounters. Even us.
This comment is so good it’s like glimpsing into the Matrix and really deserves to be read in a Morpheus voice. The last sentence especially.
 
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