Jack Monroe #509 The Silence of the Scams.

[HotesTilaire]

Bet she’s gutted she can’t wade into the Pip saga. Choose your own adventure, how would Jack make it all about herself?
- Schofe set my hackles on edge, triggering my CPTSD from the abuse I suffered as a teen, you have a sense for these things
- Schofe was an open secret THEY KNEW @ITVBoss how could you defend this (crying ITV-mate selfie)
- Schofe is no different than what the ebil tories are doing
-he’s just todays dead cat, my dm’s are full of starving people who were working but quit when their boss made it known they had to provide “personal services” otherwise they wouldn’t be paid

 

[Seaford Haggington]

Bet she’s gutted she can’t wade into the Pip saga. Choose your own adventure, how would Jack make it all about herself?
- Schofe set my hackles on edge, triggering my CPTSD from the abuse I suffered as a teen, you have a sense for these things
- Schofe was an open secret THEY KNEW @ITVBoss how could you defend this (crying ITV-mate selfie)
- Schofe is no different than what the ebil tories are doing
-he’s just todays dead cat, my dm’s are full of starving people who were working but quit when their boss made it known they had to provide “personal services” otherwise they wouldn’t be paid

If she had any sense she'd do full confession/apology and beg for a clean slate tomorrow when an avalanche of lurid details come out. Her very modest celebrity status would mean it would get very little coverage and she could try to move on.

 

[Livia Fantasy]

Oh my god Monroeverse band names!

Pighead and the Eels
Rugsack Full of Goatleg
Cooper and the Bramblymice
Rug of Doom
Death Pumble
Ouchy Shoulder
Nightmeat
Asda Trek
Deadcat of Twitter

My eldest went through a phase of playing some dorky card game, all fantasy orcs and dragons and tit like that, and what I remember from the one time I showed interest was that he’d turn his cards of trees and mountains on their side and play all these cards named things like that and proceed to annihilate his little brother. “I’ve used my Orangery of Doom to summon forth the Brambly Mice and equipped them with the Sieve of Domestos to deal more damage that you can’t block because I’ll cast SHANT.”

 

[Dogmuck]

Want to add the Barbara (Borb) Kingsolver has an 11:30 talk before this one, and that's sold out too.

Spoiler: Off topic Borbs

just finished her book Demon Copperhead, bloody loved it, slurped it up in a 3 days whilst feeling poorly, if I didn’t have to sleep cos ~ouchie head~ I’d have downed that big sucker in 24 hours. Highly recommend, go on Barbs you literary legend you

Jack isn’t even liking stuff, is she painting the new flat?

ETA- read a book can’t even spell “off” who am I Jack? Corrected myself so duck of the lot off yews

 

[ForgettyBetty]

Spoiler: Of topic Borbs

just finished her book Demon Copperhead, bloody loved it, slurped it up in a 3 days whilst feeling poorly, if I didn’t have to sleep cos ~ouchie head~ I’d have downed that big sucker in 24 hours. Highly recommend, go on Barbs you literary legend you

Jack isn’t even liking stuff, is she painting the new flat?

I read The Poisonwood Bible, quite hard work ( emotionally) but amazing

Eta not spoilered cos It is a bit "Jack-helping-the-poors-in-Tanzania" adjacent

 

[Livia Fantasy]

Max is home, and apparently that card game is either called “keyforge or magic gathering or the lord of the rings one but probably not that one cos it’s a solo story”

Kids eh? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

- - -

Had a quick scroll through Hay Festival line-up. For ten points, spot a minority.

 

[BubbleDuck]

Anyone got a spare £500 to purchase 49 tickets for Hay?

It's the most it'd let me put in my basket .

Does that mean 49 seat left to sell?
Maybe.. dunno.. it's in a small tent, 50 is the capacity..

View attachment 2199455

There was 68 left on Tuesday

 

[Dogmuck]

I read The Poisonwood Bible, quite hard work ( emotionally) but amazing

That’s my next one. Demon is pretty dark emotionally too , but mostly just shook to see Borbs in the wild Jack adjacent when I just finished her book. It’s a sign I tell ya!

 

[ForgettyBetty]

She's been liking a couple of tweets on the hell site. One about chunks of stress, being exhausted and just wanting to sleep. She's like bleeping clockwork isn't she? Though a broken clock is actually right twice a day- Jack never is.

She knows she can't tweet about QT, she will get absolutely slaughtered with the quote tweets (figuratively, Jack. Not literally)

Does this mean she's planning to stand Adam up on Monday? (He'll be furiously whatsapping Jay Rayner from the portaloos)

 

[MoistenedGussets]

There was 68 left on Tuesday

Wow, as with all Jack's stuff... Selling like room temperature cakes.

 

[appleskin]

Anyone got a spare £500 to purchase 49 tickets for Hay?

It's the most it'd let me put in my basket .

Does that mean 49 seat left to sell?
Maybe.. dunno.. it's in a small tent, 50 is the capacity..

View attachment 2199455

tried a few others in the the hive and some had over 200 available so a good chunk of people have bought for JAck

 

[Geetbo]

I would like to take a moment to thank Philip Schofield for the fact I had only 4 pages to grunk today.

 

[usefullyuseless]

Bet she’s gutted she can’t wade into the Pip saga. Choose your own adventure, how would Jack make it all about herself?
- Schofe set my hackles on edge, triggering my CPTSD from the abuse I suffered as a teen, you have a sense for these things
- Schofe was an open secret THEY KNEW @ITVBoss how could you defend this (crying ITV-mate selfie)
- Schofe is no different than what the ebil tories are doing
-he’s just todays dead cat, my dm’s are full of starving people who were working but quit when their boss made it known they had to provide “personal services” otherwise they wouldn’t be paid

Schofe called her a pretty little p**f, realised she wasn't male and then made sure her TV career ended there and then.

(Apologies for the use of the word p**f but it's how Jack once claimed she was described in a gay bar. Yes, really)

 

[MoistenedGussets]

tried a few others in the the hive and some had over 200 available so a good chunk of people have bought for JAck

Stop ruining my fun with your 'Facts'
I prefer Jack style 'Facts' which is basically whatever I say.

 

[Foxvint]

I think it was that combined with a dodgy drawing and Walliams racist history (little Britain and come fly with me) that just so happened to have been a topic of discussion on the hellsite at the time. She put two and two together and made 75 as normal trying to jump on something she thought would go viral.

Also Walliams takes the piss out of the working class and that's her niche he's all up in.
---

Anyone got a spare £500 to purchase 49 tickets for Hay?

It's the most it'd let me put in my basket .

Does that mean 49 seat left to sell?
Maybe.. dunno.. it's in a small tent, 50 is the capacity..

View attachment 2199455

Oh god I'd missed that she's talking to him. I like his books. But he did go a bit self-satisfied weary edgelord. He can get in the bin now he's Jack adjacent. Wish these people understood it's career suicide.

 

[HotesTilaire]

People are wondering if Williams might fall, hot on the heels of Pip and ITV. If he is a wrongun, I hope he does, but not until after his Hay thing. Can’t cope with Jack glomming onto that on Monday.

 

[Livia Fantasy]

Also Walliams takes the piss out of the working class and that's her niche he's all up in.
---

Oh god I'd missed that she's talking to him. I like his books. But he did go a bit self-satisfied weary edgelord. He can get in the bin now he's Jack adjacent. Wish these people understood it's career suicide.

The awesome Hannah Fry does an awful lot of heavy-lifting on their show together.

 

[Foxvint]

She's been liking a couple of tweets on the hell site. One about chunks of stress, being exhausted and just wanting to sleep. She's like bleeping clockwork isn't she? Though a broken clock is actually right twice a day- Jack never is.

She knows she can't tweet about QT, she will get absolutely slaughtered with the quote tweets (figuratively, Jack. Not literally)

She can't tweet about any work. What's the point in a guest who can't promote the event? She's so disliked she'd have a reasonable crack at being the next Bond villian.

 

[Jumpstart]

We will grift it, we will grift it View attachment 2199152

The marvellous, mechanical grift organ

 

[Fleasyweezy]

I would add "No sense of smell" to required characteristics.

Fitting in like an old (not claw) hand, Mice S