We've also only just hit October, the tough winter months are yet to be felt. People will be taking more notice of their outgoings and cutting back on the non essentials. Mind you, she has no shame in putting out a blatant beg for money when times are hard for people. Just as she did as soon as lockdown hit by tweeting her PayPal link, the grabby mare.Sorry to always be boring but:
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Thank you to Oot and other fraus who spotted this secret window into her numbers - currently picking at it to see how we can automate capture… but we opened the month with 700 subs, if we opened Nov 2022 with 664 that would be churn of 5.1%, the second highest monthly loss since records began (highest being last month’s 7.3%). We are only in the first week of the month, too…
Imagine if every month ur employer was docking over 5% pay you’d look for another job. Jacqui hun the game might very well be up.
Jack Monroe #412 Chiz on Tiz
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Omg also guys - it looks as if Patreon have a flag for creators not fulfilling their promises? The slop thickens indeed!
If we weren't both already married HTRIA, I'd be taking you to a Harvester to wife you right up STAT.
Omg you’re an actual genius!
I love you forensic ninnies!
Car Brie Nara?? Officer, arrest that squig for crimes against food!!
Thanks bb
I used to love a harvester sundae haven’t seen one in the wild in years tho! But seriously the above suggests this is something they’re monitoring so must be something they’re acting on? So implore any victims of her to get in touch with customer services even if they don’t need the money back.Anyway feel like I’ve clocked how we can get the lower number automated which will be so much fun! I leave you with this inspiring message from Patreon’s dev team…
I love it too, with a takeaway!
So she's acting like the VBI is still a thing that's happening 
Don't think she can get away from it tbh, she was completely and utterly over before she started the idea and it blew her up again. Now she's over once again and it's her only lifeline. Can't wait to see if anything materialises 
It won't, but she might get another 6 months out of promising it.
Don't think she can get away from it tbh, she was completely and utterly over before she started the idea and it blew her up again. Now she's over once again and it's her only lifeline. Can't wait to see if anything materialises It won't, but she might get another 6 months out of promising it.THis an abomination unto Nuggan. Where do you even start... The brie? The yoghurt? The onion? The f*cking ever-present and unnecessary lemon? Has she ever tasted the real thing? 🔺️ myself here, but I do know what I am talking about. Carbonara was the first dish I cooked for my not yet husband, I will never forget his face after the first forkful. I know why I married me, reader.Apologies for the crappy picture, my room is rather cave like, but wtf have they done to the pasta? It looks far worse than Jack's. I did used to make this semi regularly, not realising until I joined the canal, that I'd been entirely ignoring most of Jack's instructions (turn the pasta down. Wtf?)
Anyway, one grandad was a spy, and I can'tto save my life. The other taught welding, and it's safest for everyone that the closest I've ever been to that was the husband, who was a welder/fabricator
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Karma is a witch.Anyone find it hilarious that a decade of pretending to be relentlessly hounded has resulted in her being relentlessly hounded but by people taking the piss out of herShe must be on the verge of spontaneous combustion by now
*He* obvs.
Wow brilliant find @Valiofthedolls. That dating profile has more red flags than a Momentum rally. I loosely translate it as “Narcissist seeking a sugar mamapapa. Must centre ME in every single interaction. I have many obtuse and tiresome political opinions and you must be fawningly admiring of every single one. I’m even more of a nightmare when drunk.”More spoilering of old to new ‘how little things do change’ stuff so anyone not interested can skippety skip. Jam and Insufferable.
EDIT cos I’ve just seen BBs post about her new bio. Lol “accidental inflation analyst” my arse. She was trying to ‘analyze’ the inflation of fking value jam way back in Jan 2013 for anyone who’d listen to her bollox.We’d all perhaps be better off making our own jam, dear Smeggy. Prophetic Jack predicted in Jan 2013 that 35p jam that had gone up 6p would perhaps cost FORTY POUNDS by the end of the year. Why is she so bleeping jam obsessed?! Even though I have some in my house, I don’t even really think of jam from one year to the next while she can’t seem to shut up about it.
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The Price Of Jam: Will It Be £40 By The End Of The Year?
While in Sainsburys earlier picking up £2.69 of shopping (fromage frais, apples, rice pudding, orange and grapefruit juice and lots of kidney beans, if you're curious) I couldn't help but notice th...web.archive.org
It is truly fascinating to see just how little growing and evolving either personally or professionally she has done in the past ten years. Oh, and how little her understanding of economics and inflation has evolved too.
PS, for the fraus wondering whether mixing with leggy and the meejya set turned her insufferable, the answer’s a hard no. The blog is her in all her unfiltered narcissistic glory.
Here from her blog, for example, is the internet dating profile “her friends” wrote for her in January 2013 (but that sounds suspiciously very much exactly like her own writing). Actually maybe she has grown a little bit, cos the Tinder 2022 one was awful and no less self-aware, but this one is worse. “Mumma Jack” was looking for sugar mammas and papas even back then too…guess the sugamama hunt worked tho as she was engaged to the PoPo lady mere months later.
What does the VBI even mean? How does she picture it working? It's not a measurement of anything, just a clever quote from a Pratchett book about false economy. Other than pointing out that prices have risen while wages haven't, there's nothing "there" to make an index of. It's just useless busy work (that she isn't even doing) to make herself seem like an important voice in the poverty expert arena.
Right, BASTARDS. It’s me Jack. Hacked FrankReagan again. Daft cow still has ‘jackisagrifter’ as her password. (Who is Jackisa?).
Anyway I HAVE been working on the VBI!!!!! Softly and gently and forensically and sexily. Cos I can’t help it.
Just to show you, YOU NEFARIOUS accoutrements (note to self, double-check it means bastard in French) here are the initial findings.
Bet you feel jealous and SHAMED now. Ha! Send apologeos
Go well. Jack
VBI - Jack Edition™️
Item Starting Price
Cotswold Sideboard Free (Patreon)
Viv Westwood (RIP) frock £5 (charity shop)
Tiffany earrings Free (puddle)
77 lipsticks Free (shoplifted)
Deliveroo/Just Eat Free (Patreon)
Rinsed Hoop Cacio e Pepe Priceless (genius)
Anyway I HAVE been working on the VBI!!!!! Softly and gently and forensically and sexily. Cos I can’t help it.
Just to show you, YOU NEFARIOUS accoutrements (note to self, double-check it means bastard in French) here are the initial findings.
Bet you feel jealous and SHAMED now. Ha! Send apologeos
Go well. Jack
VBI - Jack Edition™️
Item Starting Price
Cotswold Sideboard Free (Patreon)
Viv Westwood (RIP) frock £5 (charity shop)
Tiffany earrings Free (puddle)
77 lipsticks Free (shoplifted)
Deliveroo/Just Eat Free (Patreon)
Rinsed Hoop Cacio e Pepe Priceless (genius)
Ahhh I remember over a year ago when she only had bylines in surprising places <nostalgia> no more do we gasp in wonder at them, like unexpected butterflies.
Great minds... *raises glass to you*.
Evening ninnies,
Happily waiting for the chaos with you and thought I'd share another Green Eggs pic. An even earlier incarnation than the OG one with snot ham and the baked slop.
She just won't let the Dr Suess thing go and I'm starting to think she wants to read it on cbeebies...
I mean wtaf?
Happily waiting for the chaos with you and thought I'd share another Green Eggs pic. An even earlier incarnation than the OG one with snot ham and the baked slop.
She just won't let the Dr Suess thing go and I'm starting to think she wants to read it on cbeebies...
I mean wtaf?
No. No no no. Nobody needs this crossover. Jess has been getting her grossly young wife to harass people for her in the last couple of days too.
This! People who are really poor, don't often find themselves falling into these types of careers as the doors, or even the notion of them, rarely present themselves.
I am sure there are exceptions, but as a general rule, you're often limited to the frame of reference you're exposed to.
As an example, and apologies for the me-rail, my parents were actual poors and as a result, my perception of the working world was shaped by what was around me. My mother was a travel agent and my dad a roofer working for his father, my grandad, who is incidentally DEAD.
When at age 17, having suffered very badly with actual mental health issues (the non made up kind) I found myself sofa surfing and wandering around clueless about what job I could get, if any, the last thing I thought of was journalism of any kind. I was looking for retail work, pub work etc and eventually found several jobs as a cleaner in a care home and some work as a bakery assistant.
Reader, at no time did I have the f***king nerve to quit these PAID employments despite often hating them, because I was all too aware that there may not be a cushty career loafing around boiling slop around the corner, and I knew there was no safety net at home from wealthy relatives who could prop me up.
It's very telling that FACK had ideas above her fabricated station and a total aversion to work from day one. Oh and she has never known real poverty. Not a chance in hell.
I am not poor now, far from it. But I’ve seen glimpses of it and her behaviour tells me she never truly has.
Suspiciously Fishy Fingers for Thread Title!
It can be stretched to cover all her nefariou$ activity, inappropriate personal oversharing, mangled foodstuffs and disgusting hands, so it’s basically The Full Jack
Found more evidence it's Jack. Jack blocked me on Twitter ages ago because I liked a post a sensible squig made, and I can't see anything from the sock account...This is just pathetic Jack. I have no more words but she’s so transparent it’s ridiculous and just makes her look even more utterly mental. I don’t even care about the poor squiggling out I’ve done tbh
I love this, Pumbli xx
"my mind doesn't work like other people's"...
Sorry luv, it works exactly the same as every other greedy scammer on the internet.
And "You're welcome". I have expressed no gratitude for your slop, nor shall I ever.
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