Jack Monroe #37 Don't f*** with cats.

[Flumps]

@Flumps Bass guitar!? OMG, you slayed, qween!

Dude. I was in an actual *band* that played gigs and *everything*. I dated the guitarist/lead singer for 3 years. The other members of the band were older and working, and he used to meet me after school fairly often and I was all casual about it (but secretly thrilled), as it was an all girls school and BOYS were frowned upon. Mmmmm....what is this middle-class rebellion cliche you speak of?

 

[ChickenPorridge]

Recipes for "ouchy mouths" makes me cringe SO hard fraus. I can't cope. She just doesn't suit all that twee language and ickle dickle shmoopy woo chat she comes off with. She's a brazen cow on all of her interactions with fans, unless of course she's licking blue tick arse

 

[no-no]

Any noughties teens wear this stuff? I used to cake it on in a colour more orange than my face tone and then not blend it properly. It dried my skin out no end which led me to caking it on more and more. A vicious cycle View attachment 170356

Just seeing that pot brings back so many memories Charlotte Dawson done a very accurate vid of kids of today vs (some) 90s kids.



^ that was circa age 13/14, then 15 hit and it was all black eyeliner and converse. My first Doc’s were a size too big and made me look like I had clown feet, I got them from a vintage shop because online shopping hadn’t taken off.

 

[Bookweevil]

There has never been anything like it since. I even remember one article in particular about styling hair curly or straight that I still live by. This is all I could find on it View attachment 170353

@MrsOgre is the model here a young Lisa Faulkner, or have I boggled my eyesight with too many blue contact lenses this week?!

 

[AmberSpyglass]

View attachment 170241
Oh do duck off. Nobody gives a tit about your pets. You. Told. Us.

Soz I forgot the spoiler. She’s tweeeeeeting fraus. Settle in.

Massive twit.

 

[Flumps]

@MrsOgre is the model here a young Lisa Faulkner, or have I boggled my eyesight with too many blue contact lenses this week?!

Oooo. Is it? I thought she looked familiar!

 

[Gentlemensrelish]

Off topic - Nigella posted a recipe from someone called The Boy Who Bakes on her IG. Does anyone follow him/have his book? His IG is swoonworthy but I'm not much of a baker...

 

[crystaleyesd]

Jack is all PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEE with her cutesy prose and bowls of slop and we're STILL chatting nostalgia. Sorry Jack, try harder

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

There has never been anything like it since. I even remember one article in particular about styling hair curly or straight that I still live by. This is all I could find on it View attachment 170353

Is that Lisa Faulkner?

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Omg I love this 90s/early 00s nostalgia, my incredibly late contributions (ended up getting a phone call so ended up Grunka-ing within a Grunka)

• Those teen mags with 'cringe' sections that were definitely made up, and loads of pregnancies that no one knew about which terrified virgin me...
• IMPULSE! I thought Charlie smelt so, so bad (no offence to stans)
• Boots used to do this mint fizzy foot spray does anyone remember those? It made your feet numb, duck knows what was in it
• Those pearl-y type bath balls the size of marbles? They had a gelatinous skin that'd end up stuck to you (gag)
• Being terrified of Marilyn Manson and that rumour about him removing a rib to suck his own dick (and being too young to realise that was a sexual thing, just thinking he was terrifying for wanting to do it)
• Rebook classics, my first pair of 'proper' trainers and I doubt they were actually Rebook tbh remembering the dodge shop they were from.

Back on topic to prevent Jack from stripping off to get our attention again:

View attachment 169968

Omg honestly duck off - so many of us are living in our workplaces now, suddenly with no warning or time to prepare for it, plus we're not able to claim £900 sideboards and £3k fridges (and the rest!) through allowable expenses to kit them out either! The lack of self awareness still shocks me, it shouldn't should it. She has enough spare rooms to dedicate one room to work and shut the door on it with timers, it doesn't take a bleeping brain surgeon love!

 

[Fitnessqueen]

Haha yes didn't she go around actually calling herself Dr Jack Monroe for a while? I'm sure it was her Twitter name or something
ETA she did, just found this article from Huffington post
View attachment 169863

Now this boils my piss a little bit. My son has spent 4 years working so hard on his doctorate, he got his thesis finished in Feb despite his dad (my ex-husband) being diagnosed with terminal cancer, he had his Viva last month and didn’t sleep for a fortnight beforehand and finally he was awarded his PHD and can call himself a Doctor. Jack on the other hand....

 

[NorthernSoul]

I JUST DON’T GET IT. Why do they fawn all over her?? Latest Instagram post of food for ‘ouchy mouths’ References cancer cooking book as part of the drivel she posted Of course one of her followers is concerned her ‘ouchy’mouth isn’t something more serious! Others are just the usual sycophantic fuckwittery

 

[Silver Linings]

For the love of god, woman.

Use

Paragraphs.

 

[AmberSpyglass]

There has never been anything like it since. I even remember one article in particular about styling hair curly or straight that I still live by. This is all I could find on it View attachment 170353

Is that a young Lisa Faulkner on the cover ?

 

[peperomia]

Oh wow so much fashion chat fraus! I only went off to treat myself to a piss and a sandwich and came back to these glorious cultural memoirs <3

My eldest had a pair in red. They were a b*gger to iron.

I had a special grunger pair in black/grey camo worn with a vest top AND a german army shirt

However my defining memory was drinking alcohol that’s actually banned now.

We used to drink something called a red witch which was Pernod black currant and cider. There’s no way that would be allowed now.

And pubs also used to sell half and half of lager and cider. It clearly sent people mad so pubs stopped it.

I used to drink a lot of snakebite, is it properly illegal now? I started going out drinking at 14
I recently found out via instagram that MD 20/20 was also available in the USA haha

 

[Veronicaaa]

I really don't understand why she has to adapt her recipes at all to make bland-flavoured slop, isn't that already her USP

 

[Silver Linings]

There’a a proper troll on there, not this person, who is quite right. Why? It’s so rude.

The flying monkeys will soon descend and it’ll probably be blamed on us.

 

[Flumps]

I used to drink a lot of snakebite, is it properly illegal now? I started going out drinking at 14
I recently found out via instagram that MD 20/20 was also available in the USA haha

Me too.
OMG 20/20!!

 

[peperomia]

View attachment 170402
For the love of god, woman.

Use

Paragraphs.

ERR bleeping excuse me, any resilient blue sky thinking (shudder)/ making the best of things ideas you got off of us and you know it. CREDIT THE CABAL

 

[Begborrowsteal]

Straightening our hair with our irons, dream matt mousse, spidery lash mascara & sitting in parks with our cheap vodka & mixer in coke/7up bottles. Ahh, youth.

Me too.
OMG 20/20!!

20/20 bad memories of that one