Jack Monroe #37 Don't f*** with cats.

[Veronicaaa]

That's so lovely @PennyLoafer and bodes so well for your new home. Fruit trees!!

 

[Silver Linings]

Sorry, this is totally off-topic but I just wanted to share as an antidote to Monroe's nefarious antics. I am moving house tomorrow so I just called in on my vendors to say hi (my buyers did the same and I appreciated the friendliness). Anyway, they were the nicest people. They've been in the house for 45 years so it's emotional for them but they are really excited about their new place. They're leaving me house plants, a bag of coal and a good luck money tree, plus a Christmas cactus that has been in the house for as long as they have. They gave me the lowdown on all the neighbours and talked me around the back garden. I've got bloody fruit trees, how fancy am I?

When I first viewed the place, my first impression was that it had been really loved, and a place of love; I made an offer on the spot. I told them that, and we all got a bit emotional. Swapped numbers, talked about people we know in common, offered to help each other out in future.

I've been getting so strung out about moving but now I'm excited and so heartened to be on the receiving end of real kindness.

Sorry for the gushing. I'm a bit giddy!

How lovely. I hope Jack keeps her chaos to herself and you have as calm a day as possible.

20 pages to get through! I dread to think what lies ahead, it's like reading a thriller every time.

Is it the cat, is she being 'too woke' (her words, never ours) with her hard hitting political analysis and bumlicking of the Goves? I'm about to find out...

I love how literally 95% is none of the above! No spoilers.

 

[Motherwellgirl]

View attachment 170274
You forget how long Girls Aloud have been around. I had some of those bad boys in green but my mistake was not co-ordinating the top to match.

I saw girls aloud back in the day in Glasgow.

One of the few bands I listen to that isn’t 80s music.

Muse is the other (seen them live) and I love George Ezra as well. Seen him live as well. Totally not the kind of music I ever thought I’d like but he’s brilliant.

I’ve also seen Steve Coogan back in the day when he was in his Paul/Pauline Calf persona.

Pauline ‘do you think I’m a slag tits first’.

He’s by far my favourite comedian apart from Kevin Bridges.

 

[Jay-cloth Cow]

Totally off topic and sorry for doing a JM and making it about me! Been going through a really crappy few days (for a positive reason though, my doctor has reduced the dosage on my antidepressants so my brain chemistry is a bit screwed)...just had a delivery and these arrived!! Mr LF wanted to cheer me up and knows how much I love highland cows, I'm now sending overly excited pics to everyone about my amoosing feet!

 

[help i need some help!]

Are vets open again sahn sarf? My vet is only actually seeing emergencies where they are handed over in the car park with the staff using their own leads, and everything else is by telephone. My disabled girl was due a checkup before represcription but I was grilled on her over the telephone before collecting the Metacam from an open window and paying online

I can attest. Vets are open in Sarfend cos mine emailed me to tell me so.

Totally off topic and sorry for doing a JM and making it about me! Been going through a really crappy few days (for a positive reason though, my doctor has reduced the dosage on my antidepressants so my brain chemistry is a bit screwed)...just had a delivery and these arrived!! Mr LF wanted to cheer me up and knows how much I love highland cows, I'm now sending overly excited pics to everyone about my amoosing feet!

They are fabulous.

 

[PoorPatrol]

Sorry, this is totally off-topic but I just wanted to share as an antidote to Monroe's nefarious antics. I am moving house tomorrow so I just called in on my vendors to say hi (my buyers did the same and I appreciated the friendliness). Anyway, they were the nicest people. They've been in the house for 45 years so it's emotional for them but they are really excited about their new place. They're leaving me house plants, a bag of coal and a good luck money tree, plus a Christmas cactus that has been in the house for as long as they have. They gave me the lowdown on all the neighbours and talked me around the back garden. I've got bloody fruit trees, how fancy am I?

When I first viewed the place, my first impression was that it had been really loved, and a place of love; I made an offer on the spot. I told them that, and we all got a bit emotional. Swapped numbers, talked about people we know in common, offered to help each other out in future.

I've been getting so strung out about moving but now I'm excited and so heartened to be on the receiving end of real kindness.

Sorry for the gushing. I'm a bit giddy!

Fab news! Really really great. As a serial mover, a la Jack, I know how stressful moving is and how rare it is to have such lovely vendors . Every time we’ve moved, the outgoing person has been awful, and it leaves such a sour taste moving into a new place in that way. It really is something special to move into a home with such warm spiritedness coming from the previous owners, soak it up and enjoy it. Here’s a thought to haunt you, imagine moving into Jack’s house! I know she “only rents a crappy bungalow” but just suppose.... imagine what a bloody nightmare it would be

 

[Eurgh]

She can’t possibly ever take a holiday but frequently doesn’t reply to emails/ messages from the same person over and over. Or post things or remember to do basic tasks like thanking strangers for gifts etc. Babes, YOU ARE ALREADY ON HOLIDAY.

 

[Pocahontas]

Exactly - SO irrelevant and so annoying! The time of begging for gifted tit for just ~breathing~ should be over. I think they were planning a comeback, and they had started their interiors insta, but are now MIA. Also, apparently Cash Carraway has written a play about ‘Alice’

I will always be grateful for the SODs thread as it led me to this one through you, heartoread, breakdance and harderfaster among others. Once I heard about the corned beef incident, I had to investigate.
Needless to say, I had the last laugh.

Sorry to quote my own post like a wanker - but I was having a look at the old SODs thread to see when I was persuaded to come check this one out - and *this* gem from @PoorPatrol was the cincher

 

[GoLando]

Pretty sure her grandad had one. A while back she loved to go on about it. She would NEVER turn one down.

She'd have an excuse ready of "it's important to show other downtrodden impoverished mavericks that they too can beat the establishment"

 

[Pocahontas]

Sorry, this is totally off-topic but I just wanted to share as an antidote to Monroe's nefarious antics. I am moving house tomorrow so I just called in on my vendors to say hi (my buyers did the same and I appreciated the friendliness). Anyway, they were the nicest people. They've been in the house for 45 years so it's emotional for them but they are really excited about their new place. They're leaving me house plants, a bag of coal and a good luck money tree, plus a Christmas cactus that has been in the house for as long as they have. They gave me the lowdown on all the neighbours and talked me around the back garden. I've got bloody fruit trees, how fancy am I?

When I first viewed the place, my first impression was that it had been really loved, and a place of love; I made an offer on the spot. I told them that, and we all got a bit emotional. Swapped numbers, talked about people we know in common, offered to help each other out in future.

I've been getting so strung out about moving but now I'm excited and so heartened to be on the receiving end of real kindness.

Sorry for the gushing. I'm a bit giddy!

Penny that all sounds amazing. So so so so happy for you. Nothing like a kind, warm welcome. Wish you ALL the best in your new home We expect to some jams and fruit cake (NOT peach cake though, don’t get up in Jack’s niche ) lots of love x x x

 

[JoyceDivision]

She'd have an excuse ready of "it's important to show other downtrodden impoverished mavericks that they too can beat the establishment"

cue the new twitter handle @DrJackMonroeMBE

the B is for BUSY

 

[PoorPatrol]

Sorry to quote my own post like a wanker - but I was having a look at the old SODs thread to see when I was persuaded to come check this one out - and *this* gem from @PoorPatrol was the cincher View attachment 170314

Ha! I want to a do a heart AND a laughing emoji mixed together

 

[Saint_clemmie]

My cousin had the spice girls body spray, she was (still is!) one year older than me and I could never reach the height of her sophistication.
I used to love crimping the tit out of my hair and then waving on hair mascara a la Lizzie Maguire.

Don't think parachute pants have been mentioned yet? You know the baggy ones with far too much going on tassel wise? My profile picture on my MSN group page (just before Myspace) was me in a pair of those holding a bacardi breezer. I was 14 and underage drinking like a boss.

yes! I went down a beauty wormhole earlier looking for these lipsticks, I’m sure they were Rimmel colour pop, (brightly coloured transparent tubes) But can’t find them. Did rediscover the hair mascara and miss sporty eye shadow though also the maybelline foundation stick I always really wanted modelled by Buffy.

I had bright BRIGHT pink parachute pants...my poor mum! I think they were from Tammy girl. Ah the nostalgia.

 

[Chocolate girl]

Sugar magazine, butterfly hair clips, HANSON!!!

I was obsessed with wearing (my sisters)
Rimmel 'Heather Shimmer' lipstick.

Topped off with 5 million squirts of Kindred Spirit, bought from Woolworths and I thought I was the height of sophistication

 

[Readingismyhobby]

Are vets open again sahn sarf? My vet is only actually seeing emergencies where they are handed over in the car park with the staff using their own leads, and everything else is by telephone. My disabled girl was due a checkup before represcription but I was grilled on her over the telephone before collecting the Metacam from an open window and paying online

My vets is open for some cases. My dog was due his annual inoculation in April, was told he could go 3 months over. He had his jabs today. Handed over outside and payed outside as well.

 

[MrsOgre]

Is there any 80s girls here? I feel so old now after reading all these posts. Anyone remember Look magazine, I still live by their beauty tips. I got my hands on vintage purple mie dm's earlier this year, still trying to break them in as don't think they'd ever been worn. Also body shop henna, would take hours and the smell but worth it afterwards.

@PennyLoafer best wishes for your move into your lovely new home

 

[maytoseptember]

Ah all this 90s talk has me nostalgic...life was much simpler when I used to spend Saturdays at Pitsea Market to get my school disco outfits, caking my face in orange foundation I nicked out my mums case and painstakingly putting those tiny bloody butterfly clips into my crispy glittered hair...sigh

Didn’t think I’d ever see Pitsea Market on this thread. I grew up in Basildon (I got out though, go me), so we’re practically neighbours.

<waves to all the Essex Tattlers>

 

[JoyceDivision]

This was my absolute favourite

 

[Toffee finger]

View attachment 170241
Oh do duck off. Nobody gives a tit about your pets. You. Told. Us.

Soz I forgot the spoiler. She’s tweeeeeeting fraus. Settle in.

Ergh seriously Jack. You went in to loads of detail about the cats condition first. People are going to be concerned for it. Just say the first part, that you’ve got a care plan from the vets and are following it. You don’t need the extra bullshit about tRoLLz. That’s when people start to wonder what you’re hiding. Jesus she is EXASPERATING.

 

[Spanner]

Is there any 80s girls here? I feel so old now after reading all these posts. Anyone remember Look magazine, I still live by their beauty tips. I got my hands on vintage purple mie dm's earlier this year, still trying to break them in as don't think they'd ever been worn. Also body shop henna, would take hours and the smell but worth it afterwards.

@PennyLoafer best wishes for your move into your lovely new home

I loved Looks magazine! Absolutely loved it. I can still remember some of the features. No one ever remembers it now, so THANK YOU!