Jack Monroe #336 Her writing style makes me wish I’d never learnt to read

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kachoochoo

kachoochoo

I am coming from a 24 hour behind grunk, so about a year in jack time.

someone said "nightmeat sounds like heartbeat" so:

🎵nightmeat
why do you miss when my pumble kisses me?

nightmeat
why does a yellow sticker stay in my inventory?🎵

and the pumble dall e that captain mouse asked for

Screenshot_20220706-213933_Chrome.jpg


be back in real time soon! I've seen her twitter! nothing looks good!
 
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Sideboard Bob

Sideboard Bob

NellieBoo said:
I think she should go for it. She's harped on about it enough.
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You’ve made me realise she’s used this picture for a “joke“ a few times now, remember the “how it started, how it’s going” pinned tweet? It’s so cringe!
 
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Rekyavikgirl

Rekyavikgirl

Django, apologies for my chicken comment. I've had dogs that react badly to it but I shouldn't have generalised.
 
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Mr Krabs

Mr Krabs

Cucumberthunder said:
Just reading this and hear baby cucumber coughing then throwing up via the monitor. His bedding, clothes and my clothes plus towel from the bath will fill the washing machine easily. So can confirm babies generate a lot of washing.
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I’m sorry. Dealing with a puking baby is awful. I hope you get some sleep. It gets much better when they can aim for a bowl!
 
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M

MsGilmore

Gutted that I missed the night meat barbecue!
Hell will have to freeze over before Jack gets into number 10!
 
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DisgruntledGoat

DisgruntledGoat

hellosailor⚓ said:
Bless her little mam. These are her comments under the I MUST DANCE ballet photo and a post in which Jack claims she's gotten death and rape threats on twitter (2015) 😑. I would look for more but every time I screen shot the page reloads to the top! View attachment 1397647View attachment 1397648
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Interesting that Jack was such a Super Serious Ballet Performer that she must give all speeches on her toes yet judging by this message from her mum she was clearly never en pointe. Not exactly Anna Pavlova, pals.

Don’t even get me started on that sleeveless scuba monstrosity. Just because it has lapels and you’ve paired it with a dreadful shimmery pair of American Tan rights doesn’t make it business, Jack.
 
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Captainmouse

Captainmouse

Dogmuck said:
I wonder if, after he’s calmed down from his hormonal teenage rage, she’ll get the conversation cards out so they can have some jolly japes? That lad does not know he’s born, the lucky little devil.

I’d put money on him not being there tbh, she just wanted to make it look like she has him more than one night a week, not buying it love. She also wanted us to know the dog was poorly and that’s why she was up tweeting shite at 4am, you were up tweeting shite BC (before content). She wanted us to know she’s fully aware that the dog isn’t allowed out until he’s had all his vaccinations. There’s far too much information in those tweets, it’s what liars do.
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She just wanted to let us know she’s caught up 👋
 
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ChickenPorridge

ChickenPorridge

I swear she lifted that no.10 pic straight from here on her grunk, can tell it's a screenshot she didn't quite crop out the share/edit etc options at the bottom. 🗣 Get your own material! 🗣
 
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WTFDidIJustSee

WTFDidIJustSee

Mr Krabs said:
I don’t believe she ever took testosterone. (Shocker I know). There were never any physical signs that she was on it, such as facial hair growth, thinning head hair (despite the supposed bald patches) or voice changes. I remember one of her cookery books, the one with the tool belt, her face looks a lot more masculine. But that’s clearly photoshopped to all hell and she’s not even recognisable.
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Grunking, but it was a good 6 months before my brother grew “bum fluff” (his words, not mine 🤣) on his face, and about 2 years before he had an actual, proper tash. His voice, however, broke pretty fast, which was bleeping hilarious, and it’s continued getting deeper.

I don’t believe she ever took it at all.

The hoops to jump through to get T are long and hard, Jack doesn’t have the staying power required. They’re even longer and harder if you have unstable mental health, like my brother/Jack does.

I don’t know what other PCTs are like, but that’s his experiences and the one here is really good.
 
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M

Mogmog

So... is the bbq friend a friend of SB's or the new OH? We know Jack moves quickly 👀

Edit: pure speculation m'lud but also if I'm right I'd like to come back to this prediction
 
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