Jack Monroe #336 Her writing style makes me wish I’d never learnt to read

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She'd be erecting statues of herself first up.
Can picture exactly what they'd look like too -

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She's a fine one to be criticising Boris' statement for its insincerity. Old Me-rail Monroe, who can't devote more than a sentence to a serious topic before talking endlessly about herself every time 🙄.
 
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Jack must identify with the 'miserably contemplates catastrophically bleeping up' the one thing she wanted most in the world as she looks back at the dismal wreckage of Daily Kitchen Live. Or indeed most of her career opportunities.

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Jack must identify with the 'miserably contemplates catastrophically bleeping up' the one thing she wanted most in the world as she looks back at the dismal wreckage of Daily Kitchen Live. Or indeed most of her career opportunities.

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To say nothing of all those broken engagements. There's Johnson onto his third marriage and poor Jack can't get anyone up the aisle.
 
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I’m behind because of work and spending every spare second watching the news but just came over to sweetly say that I don’t think Jack has any right whatsoever to comment on politics when she can’t declare her tax…
Just my opinion but as it stands I WONT wait with baited breadth to see those accounts she supposedly filed a few weeks ago…
 

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To say nothing of all those broken engagements. There's Johnson onto his third marriage and poor Jack can't get anyone up the aisle.
Plus wishing him underwear two sizes too small. We all remember her baggy greying monstrosities 😬
 
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Can picture exactly what they'd look like too -

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She's a fine one to be criticising Boris' statement for its insincerity. Old Me-rail Monroe, who can't devote more than a sentence to a serious topic before talking endlessly about herself every time 🙄.
I dunno why, but Jack in a cape always gives me Waynetta Slob in that sketch where she won the lottery vibes. I think it’s because she looks so grimy but thinks she looks so fancy. Delusional.
 
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I used to take Night Nurse to help me sleep when my husband died. Three years of 24 hours caring for him really jiggered up my sleeping patterns. It did work, I can't lie but I wouldn't take it again.
This talk of night nurse reminds me of when I had a nasty cough // cold (Dec 2019, I’m convinced it was Covid) and we went to the chemist because I needed a good nights sleep and I knew that night nurse would do that …. Husband goes into the chemist whilst I’m standing outside with the dog…. Can see him asking and suddenly I panicked he was going to get the capsules so I thrust open the door yelling “the liquid, it has to be the liquid”. Omg the chemists face was 😱

I’m behind because of work and spending every spare second watching the news but just came over to sweetly say that I don’t think Jack has any right whatsoever to comment on politics when she can’t declare her tax…
Just my opinion but as it stands I WONT wait with baited breadth to see those accounts she supposedly filed a few weeks ago…
Ffs. JACK PAY YOUR bleeping TAXES AND FILE YOUR ACCOUNTS. I’m sure you’ve got it all nearly, softly, gently filed away in one of your lever arch folders !!! 😡
 
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Oh come on Jack, the whole thing was awesome and hilarious, including those cabinet members who went, well you know yesterday I said yes, I've been having a bIt of a think, and chatted it over with my oh, and, sorry but...

I'm off work this week so could watch it unwind as it happened. I can just see Micky Gove cackling maniacally as he does the duck you dance.

On the minus side the whole bleeping thing is likely to have major implications for my job,if he does stay until September, not sure what they will be yet, but duck it, it is worth it for the lols.
 
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I did not know T is a "forever home". Makes sense, of course, just hadn't thought it through. So interesting about the changes to who he looks like. Genes are amazing
It has to be taken for life even post surgery. It can be taken in gel form too but my relative actually experienced worse side affects with the gel.
 
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Can’t take night nurse, as it makes me sleep for over 24 hours with lurid dreams
Codeine gives me headaches and hallucinations. The best pain relief I've ever had was gas and air when giving birth. I'd have one of those installed above my bed if I could.
 
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Can picture exactly what they'd look like too -

View attachment 1399573

She's a fine one to be criticising Boris' statement for its insincerity. Old Me-rail Monroe, who can't devote more than a sentence to a serious topic before talking endlessly about herself every time 🙄.
What has happened to Jack in that photo? Where's her pointy, pixie like chin, high cheekbones and pouty full lips? Did the Guardian filter them out?

How rude of them. We have all seen Jack's selfies, so they can't fool us. We all know that Jack has perfect skin and features of a pre-pubescent boy.🙃
 
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Still laughing at Jack's arrogance about coming up to Scotland to "campaign".

It's like when someone she follows...(cant remember who, but someone quite well know I think)....wrote a book and Jack said ... "want me to write something for the cover?"

Her pompous self importance is just mind boggling!🤓
 
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To say nothing of all those broken engagements. There's Johnson onto his third marriage and poor Jack can't get anyone up the aisle.
Jack Monroe, always the bridesmaid fiancée, never the bride.

Just like Uncle Geoffrey husband of Una says in Bridget Jones “Off they run, wheeeee”

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I once took in a mama cat with her six newborn babies for three months, just until they were old enough for the local shelter to rehome. Mama cat was the sweetest cat ever, clingy even, but I swear the six offsprings of Satan kittens cost me what little sanity I had.

When I was still working at a large veterinary practice, we had a stray doe rabbit come in who was very pregnant and had her kits overnight. Sadly the doe passed away from suspected VHD as she was probably unvaxxed 🙁 (vaccs are vital for buns, literally the difference between life and death). We had to hand rear the kits and keep them warm. Initially they were fed every hour with droppers and this slowly increased as they got older. It was hard work and that was between 3 of us. We had to do nights as well. Rabbits are nowhere near as hyper as cats and dogs but still very active, playful and in need of constant varying stimulation. Of course we loved them and took lots of pics for the practice SM. First thing anyone did on a morning start was ask about the babies and go to see them. So yeah, Jack's lack of spamming is making me wonder. Maybe she bought Content for SB with dad's permission. Narcs will often try to buy a person's affection through extravagant gifts. Perhaps that's what's going on here.
 
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