Jack Monroe #333 Bootsnack crook

[Feck]

Hanging baskets above the bath...?? I'm all for plants in the bathroom but that's a bit rank, non?

I love a relaxing bath. Eucalyptus, grass-cutting and oat-filled old tights turning the water grey whilst black flies and moist soil, from the weed-filled hanging baskets, perfume the air. Bliss.

 

[Dogmuck]

“Looks like PAY YOUR TAXES to me” - Alan Titchmarsh.

I know it’s too early but fml this has to be the next thread title

Can I just touch on the 8 year old chard seeds.What phase was she in 8 years ago that allowed her to grow chad? Was she with Allegra? Did she chard up Allegra’s garden?Is it just an amazing coincidence that the crappy bungalow also had chard growing In my life I’ve lived in 24 different places,never, not even once, had chard…am I doing house moves wrong?
I’m grunking so this has probs been mentioned by the canal…I’ve done a bit of gardening in my time and was under the impression seeds had a shelf life of tops 2/3 years so 8 year seeds just made me think is it possible our Jack, although I know it’s not possible cos ADHD, is lying? So I googled and guess what…

 

[silverBirch21]

Followed these threads for over 2 years, and at last my specialised subject has appeared. I’m totally here for vegetable growing chaos.
She has planted each tiny weeny mustard cress seed in a module tray, what an idiot. What’s even more astounding is that our ’beloved celebrity chef’ doesn’t even recognise mustard seed.
It‘s quite possible she has did the original chard post just for the content engagement, surely she’s not that stupid.

 

[Captainmouse]

Yes. I think I said this before. She is in love with the idea of being with someone who has plenty of money and can invest in her. She is not mourning the loss of a relationship, she is mourning the loss of having someone and the opportunities they brought.a meal ticket.

Bib FTFTY

 

[Walkdengirl]

Deleting holidays from the joint Google calendar? After what was it, two and a half minutes of relationship? Good god the pumble is real! I’ve been married 5 years, we have no joint calendars and still haven’t had a honeymoon because no money! The bleeping entitlement is off the scale…

We've been married since 1988 and we don't have a joint calendar, hell we never even had those paper family ones that used to be so popular

 

[Five hundred dogs]

I very much doubt the dandelion over the bath thing happened. It’s yet another look at the wacky but cute scrapes only our smol pixie could get into stupid stories. I know someone irl who tends to tell these kinds of lies, they claim to get themselves into all these daft situations with lots of tee hee, having a bath full of dandelion seeds is so me type comments. It’s tiresome but in all other aspects they’re a nice person, the lies are basically harmless attention seeking and they don’t tell nasty or self aggrandising lies so it’d feel churlish to call them out on it. I don’t feel churlish calling Jack out though.

 

[silverBirch21]

I’m also an ex charity shop Frau. Most other people with a public profile are happy to work with a specific charity when they need to clear-out clothing. It works as a great fund-raising event for the charity and gives the ‘celeb’ really positive PR (worth far more than the small beans she will raise on Vinted).

 

[Alice in Blunderland]

No. The allegedly abusive one was her first fiancée, pre-SB, about whom we know nothing.

Jack's coming out post:

View attachment 1385969

Timing fits - she & the policewoman broke up just before the Sainsbury's ad.

Coming out post also has this, presumably for Allegra:

View attachment 1385971

Please don't call me A Girl Called Jack. I have something to tell you.

First published in the New Statesman on 20 October 2015. If you are a journalist or other media outlet, please scroll to the bottom of this piece and read carefully. “URGENT: Legal warning: Jack Mo...

web.archive.org

How about just a joint apology to all the people she’s used and abused while she tries out her various identities and for then vilifying them on social media for likes, follows, sympathy and cash when it’s over?

 

[Captainmouse]

Disgusting she’s got a joint calendar packed full of even more holidays abroad without her son. PLEASE get him a passport and PLEASE take him somewhere you head!

Maybe harold didn’t want to pay for her son, and we know she resents putting her hand in her pocket unless it’s for her benefit. Or maybe she’s not allowed to take him

 

[Geetbo]

I wish Kim and Aggie were still going and could stand the sight of each other, they would have a field day in the crappy Bungalow.

 

[Froggies]

THEY HAD A JOINT GOOGLE CALENDAR!!

 

[NellieBoo]

Followed these threads for over 2 years, and at last my specialised subject has appeared. I’m totally here for vegetable growing chaos.
She has planted each tiny weeny mustard cress seed in a module tray, what an idiot. What’s even more astounding is that our ’beloved celebrity chef’ doesn’t even recognise mustard seed.
It‘s quite possible she has did the original chard post just for the content engagement, surely she’s not that stupid.

So what has sprouted in the trays is it? It's not going to grow into chard/radish/coriander?

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

You're basing it on what you've been told by experienced gardeners, but whatever.

 

[fairylights2000]

THEY HAD A JOINT GOOGLE CALENDAR!!

Surely if they'd split up you'd just delete the joint 'Jack + Harold's Hols' Google calendar altogether, rather than take out all the individual appointments

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

 

[MsGilmore]

So what has sprouted in the trays is it? It's not going to grow into chard/radish/coriander?

 

[ContentCrunch]

someone (a 20 something deadly social justice bore) was explaining the JM vimes boots index to their mum and elderly Nan in a Yorkshire based Gregg’s today and getting cross with them both

Me and t’Nan locked eyes and as she got up she said to me “she’s got a lot to learn.”

Nan are you here?
I repeat is greggs Nan here?

 

[Readingismyhobby]

My most abiding memory of Countryfile (YEARS ago) is of John Craven talking to a farmer about sarcoptic mange mites. So, maybe the mange mites are the Jack-Clothing-Countryfile link?

Also a Welsh frau currently exiled in the USA far away from the green green grass of home. Send cawlo and bara brithos.

(too short, the only Welsh things I could find).

 

[TankGirl]

Pumboleo!

It took a while but now it’s rattling around and won’t leave … PUMBOLEO … and do we have a new thread title …. All together now ….
PUMBOLEO PUMBOLEO

(too short, the only Welsh things I could find).

Sending a Cwtch x

 

[auntylil]

I will give her a pass for feeling heartbroken. She possibly has an anxious attachment style which is genuinely making this very painful for her. But how has she got to this age without knowing what not to do post-breakup?

Here’s what you do, Jack.

You get plenty of sleep. You get yourself a nice notepad and you write in it every day. You read a break-up self-help book and take the advice to heart. You reflect on what went wrong and take responsibility. You go no-contact for 60 days. You choose very carefully who you talk to about the breakup, because people will get sick of hearing it. That’s what your journal is for.

You go on a walk every day. You throw yourself into actual work. Not Twitter. You set a time limit on your phoneS for that.

Honestly. There are heartbroken 16 year olds dealing with breakups with more dignity.

This is lovely advice and so very wise, she would do well to pay heed (but we know she won't!).

Wasn't it just yesterday that she shared a picture which said she was living a life beyond her wildest dreams? This is why one shouldn't share every detail of one's life on social media. She really is an up & down person, definitely fits with the personality disorders you lovely ninnies discuss. Or perhaps she's just a drama queen, I can't decide. #icanreally