Jack Monroe #206 I wouldn’t trust her with a spam fritter

[Captainmouse]

Indeed it isn’t but it does seem to lack anchovies and is the first thing she has made in a long time that is actually edible (minus the weird flowers).

I wouldn’t put money on that

 

[FrumpyCat]

At this point we’re just going to have to replace me with a bot that repeats her dad is a multi property landlord

Her first book references a £4k watch she was given for her birthday

She’s live tweeted chronic diarrhoea there is no secrets left between her and this coven

Alhough given Jack's history of lying about everything I am doubting the existence of the birthday watch.

 

[Lanie]

I wouldn’t put money on that

They do look somewhat edible like her domino biscuits. They weren't homemade either, more toddler cooking at nursery.

 

[SlopAmbsase]

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Spoiler: The full picture

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That thing is terrifying.

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

I think the Hadjicostas family home is probably some kind of space-time vortex, where the kitchen is simultaneously a plank of wood over a bannister and a luxuriously-equipped haven where Papa makes his SmartPrice trifle.

Or is she referring to Allegra’s kitchen, here? It would be an egregious mangling of the timeline, as usual, but looks like an ivory rangemaster to me (and realistically, I just can’t see someone who rationed fruit salad and made his biological and foster children fight to the death for the lone cherry stretch to one).

 

[NomDeGuerre]

Allegra’s kitchen scares the shite out of me. I’m hardly Marie Kondo but you could ditch a good 40% of that clutter and still not see any work surface.

 

[Captainmouse]

I think the Hadjicostas family home is probably some kind of space-time vortex, where the kitchen is simultaneously a plank of wood over a bannister and a luxuriously-equipped haven where Papa makes his SmartPrice trifle.

Or is she referring to Allegra’s kitchen, here? It would be an egregious mangling of the timeline, as usual, but looks like an ivory rangemaster to me (and realistically, I just can’t see someone who rationed fruit salad and made his biological and foster children fight to the death for the lone cherry stretch to one).

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I love how the cabal are all trained bloodhounds, there is very little they cannot track

 

[FrumpyCat]

Okay, I can't find it. But I *swear* she did.

You don't have the receipts, but it did happen.

Okaaaay.

 

[BlendedSlop]

Just finished my morning Grunk. Something smells fishy, and for once it ain't anchoiade.

Anyway...

Hello @anon12300 can I point you in the direction of thread 91? Were Jack took £20 off a person (it came out of their winter fuel allowance). This kind person donated it to her for her to buy a wheeled shopping trolley even though someone had already been kind enough to buy her one and Jack just couldn’t be bothered to collect it and to my knowledge still hasn’t. https://tattle.life/threads/jack-monroe-91-poor-ish.10410/

I still remember just after the shopping trolley begging episode, when another squig asked if she'd managed to get one and she replied with something like "Someone sent one to my agent apparently." Not "A lovely follower kindly donated one, I haven't had chance to collect it yet but it's really going to help." I'm not even sure if she thanked the poor sod who sent it.

 

[Veronicaaa]

Allegra’s kitchen scares the shite out of me. I’m hardly Marie Kondo but you could ditch a good 40% of that clutter and still not see any work surface.

It's the way Jack's just shamelessly stolen Allegra's aesthetic (check out the utensils hanging from the window and the magnetic spice containers on the fridge, not to mention the hanging knives) and then later on pretended like it's all her own smol pixie puppy brained idea. Not an ounce of originality in her.

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

I love how the cabal are all trained bloodhounds, there is very little they cannot track

I didn’t expect to be coming out of lockdown on track for a Master’s degree in Jack Monroe Studies but here we are!

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

I think the Hadjicostas family home is probably some kind of space-time vortex, where the kitchen is simultaneously a plank of wood over a bannister and a luxuriously-equipped haven where Papa makes his SmartPrice trifle.

Or is she referring to Allegra’s kitchen, here? It would be an egregious mangling of the timeline, as usual, but looks like an ivory rangemaster to me (and realistically, I just can’t see someone who rationed fruit salad and made his biological and foster children fight to the death for the lone cherry stretch to one).

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The bit I shared was from her first book a girl called Jack, and the original essay hunger hurts so yeaaars before Allegra. It’s her family home’s kitchen she’s referring to as being well stocked with a range hob, she also mentions getting organic veg boxes delivered to her executive flat prior to the poverty.

Allegra’s kitchen is truly something tho lol

 

[BlendedSlop]

It's the way Jack's just shamelessly stolen Allegra's aesthetic (check out the utensils hanging from the window and the magnetic spice containers on the fridge, not to mention the hanging knives) and then later on pretended like it's all her own smol pixie puppy brained idea. Not an ounce of originality in her.

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I'm sorry but her emo hair from this era always makes me and

 

[Boyo]

I didn’t expect to be coming out of lockdown on track for a Master’s degree in Jack Monroe Studies but here we are!

I reckon a distinction is guaranteed and the ‘further work’ section in your diss sets you up nicely for a PhD.

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

I reckon a distinction is guaranteed and the ‘further work’ section in your diss sets you up nicely for a PhD.

Then I can be a double doctor just like Jack!!!! BRB writing a funding proposal as we speak.

 

[MancBee]

Is that broken spaghetti pieces, or threadworms?

 

[Saint_clemmie]

I'm on the matt haig thread too

ETA - it was a genuine question. I've not used patreon before. Being unconvinced someone isn't 100% a bad person because I haven't read all 200+ threads doesn't make me a troll. I pop in and out of this site and I haven't heard of most of the people the site talks about. I stumbled across the RSM thread after looking at the Jack threads. Bit weird that you're this suspicious?

Jumping in before I catch up. In my opinion, the best insight to Jacks personality is through her interactions on Twitter (i’m sure some will be logged on the wiki). One of the ouchy mouth threads will suffice, every single suggestion from well-meaning squiggles she's “tried it”. Here she demonstrates all her best traits, lies, passive aggressiveness, rudeness and just nasty. She is not a good person in my opinion, and full of bullshit.

 

[SlopAmbsase]

That thing is terrifying.

Sorry to be a metaphorical dick and do a self quote, but now I’m fully caught up I now realise the sentient slug eggs/guardians of the Village were not the scariest thread event of last night.




ETA - Bridget Fonda has a full on kumquat in that movie! Am I single white female-ing her? Was Jack? We are truly through the looking glass now, Fraus.

 

[Veronicaaa]

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Is that broken spaghetti pieces, or threadworms?

It's the way you never see any of these attempts at dessert plated up, I assume because they're impossible to scrape off the tray.

 

[jordishaw]

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Is that broken spaghetti pieces, or threadworms?

Probably bits of pretzel, finger on the pulse of 2017 as per. Off topic, Nigella's Instagram currently offers a masterclass in dealing with online idiocy.

It's the way you never see any of these attempts at dessert plated up, I assume because they're impossible to scrape off the tray.

Be very grateful for smol mercies